so since yesterdays post i've been paranoid all day lol. i must have gone through all the worst case scenerios possible in which someone somehow gets onto my xanga and reads my private entries and then makes them global. i'm so odd sometimes. i'm self conscious about what i'm writing even in a journal i know is private. how sad, lol. but anyway, today was really boring. i set aside today to stay home and gather things together that i want to take to college. well, due to apathy and the fact that a little over half the things i'm taking were already set out (besides clothes, that'll be the last thing i pack. cant run around naked!) it only took about an hour or so. so i basically sat around all day doing nothing. getting fat. lol. jonathan was out doing stuff with friends, otherwise i would have hung out with him instead...but beleive me, i tried. so i'm getting really anxious to go to school now. newark high started school today. liz and yazan have left, as well as reid and britni, and nate has been in school for a long time already. i'm just so bored. and seriously, i dislike school as much as the next person, but i'm just ready to get out of the house and meet my room mate and all that. maybe even do some activities....i know.  its weird. i wonder what my parents are going to do with themselves. macy is probably gonna think she rules the house lol. i really need to start reading that book about college again, i havent really had the time lately but i figure i should finish it before i leave, considering the book is titled Things You Need to Know BEFORE College. makes sense, dont you think?  i think i'm not so much worried anymore about whether my room mate is normal or nice or whatever (since i've talked to her on facebook and she doesnt look insane or anything in her pictures) but more about whether she will think i'm normal and nice. i'm just too self conscious i guess. or maybe i'm just eager to please? perhaps the two go hand in hand sometimes. i'm just really bored right now. where's that book.... | 
