i called wayne and wished him a happy father's day (even though i was a day late).
it was sureal. and uncomfortable.

i had been telling myself for about a week that i needed to re-connect.
so i did.

today, i visited "the house". grant dropped me off. we talked alone for about half an hour, ten of which was him apologizing. i was ready for that.
he surprised me with gifts and declared it chi-chi-boo day. then grant came back to pick me up and wayne got to meet him and we ended up playing ping-pong. mom and jazzy later arrived and grant got to meet them and then we had had a nice vegitarian dinner together.

i got to take grant out to the park so he could watch wayne perform.

surprisingly it was excellent night.

today, wayne hugged grant twice, played pong with him, showed his collection of records, served us dinner, took our pictures, and told grant he is a part of our family and is welcome back anytime.

it felt so good not only for me to be accepted but also to see grant accepted as well (and so quickly).

it is so good to have grant in my life...
especially during a time where after two and half years, i have a family again.

sir grantus and i went to the beach at tuttle last night after work.
it was terrifying!

besides it being pitch black when we got there, there was also trees and branches that had been swept a good ways up shore from all the previous rains. so we hiked that and a stream of mud and then we were home free. The sand felt so nice and there were wild shrubs and exotic rocks EVERYWHERE!  we built a fire and watched the sunrise. Ah, love.

we stayed until i got tired and attempted to make a get away and were unsuccessful. After about an hour of digging tire wheels out of sand we came to understand the extent of our defeat and and stumbled over a christian camp and a couple of guys produced magical shovels from their pockets and we were saved! hurray! and then the thorny trees attacked the vehicle. and then then the logs didn't want the car to drive straight and slid us sideways, and then 3 huge herds of bicyclers almost trampled us.

and then sir grantus picked me wild flowers! and almost drove off the road 50 billion times. he also followed a woman who drove into a lane of oncoming traffic and almost backed into us! he jumped many curbs and ran two stop lights (the second one almost into another car).
i blame myself.

we are back at his apartment and just finished our showers.
i've got a long day ahead.

i'm dating again.
"why?" i ask?
i can't answer myself.

but we are blinded by love.
it took only a week.
he's polished my rusted heart.
and now it patters.

i need a new apartment.
i need a new job.
i need a new FACE.

just listen up, god,
put me on an island in the sun.

k?

when dakota wakes up
he's a ninja!

sometimes we are lonely so that when we do meet the right people, it's at the best possible times in our life.

it's nice when someone falls for you.

it's painful to fall for no apparent reason and twist your ankle on concrete and ram your arm into screen doors.
it sure is funny though.

i puke like a baby.

grant gave me a beaut-iful bicycle!

people evolve. nothing is forever.
no serious relationships for me.
no sir.

"i want some guacamole"