Weblog

Wednesday, July 02, 2008

  • Eh...

    What can I say? I love him to death. I really do. But everyone around me seems to be getting married and having kids. Don't get me wrong. I want a good education. I want to be successful(define successful...) before anything like that happens. But everyone just seems so happy and I can't help feel like I'm missing out on something.

    I want to get married... someday. To Mike? Maybe, but who knows what the plan is.
    I want to have kids... someday. With Mike? Well that all depends on the first question. I guess maybe I'm just lonely right now and seeing everyone happy is making me sad. (Does that even make sense?)

    Is it sad that I keep waiting for him to get down on one knee? Even if we were to get engaged, a wedding wouldn't happen til at least one of us had graduated. I think maybe I'm just being extremely girlie right now.

    *sigh*  I really miss him.

    ~manajo

Sunday, April 29, 2007

  • So it's been about a year... for those of you that know what I'm talking about... And I heard this song on the radio like 5 minutes ago. It still applies to the situation, which is scary to me. I really really really want to move on with my life... BTW Happy Birthday Jake. You are still in my prayers everyday and my guardian angel watching over me...

    Kelly Clarkson  - Because of you
    I will not make the same mistakes that you did 
    I will not let myself cause my heart so much misery 
    I will not break the way you did 
    You fell so hard 
    I've learned the hard way, to never let it get that far 

    Because of you 
    I never stray too far from the sidewalk 
    Because of you 
    I learned to play on the safe side
    So I don't get hurt 
    Because of you 
    I find it hard to trust 
    Not only me, but everyone around me 
    Because of you 
    I am afraid 

    I lose my way 
    And it's not too long before you point it out 
    I cannot cry 
    Because I know that's weakness in your eyes 
    I'm forced to fake, a smile, a laugh
    Every day of my life 
    My heart can't possibly break 
    When it wasn't even whole to start with 

    Because of you 
    I never stray too far from the sidewalk 
    Because of you 
    I learned to play on the safe side 
    So I don't get hurt 
    Because of you 
    I find it hard to trust 
    Not only me, but everyone around me 
    Because of you 
    I am afraid 

    I watched you die 
    I heard you cry
    Every night in your sleep 
    I was so young 
    You should have known better than to lean on me 
    You never thought of anyone else 
    You just saw your pain 
    And now I cry 
    In the middle of the night 
    For the same damn thing

    Because of you 
    I never stray too far from the sidewalk 
    Because of you 
    I learned to play on the safe side 
    So I don't get hurt 
    Because of you 
    I tried my hardest just to forget everything 
    Because of you 
    I don't know how to let anyone else in 
    Because of you 
    I'm ashamed of my life because it's empty 
    Because of you 
    I am afraid 

    Because of you
    Because of you


Tuesday, March 06, 2007

  • Wow... so how long has it been since I've been on Xanga? It's been facebook mostly and myspace sometimes. I've been crazy busy with college and such. I find out Friday if I made RA or not. I'm excited. If I don't make it I'll be rooming with Steph and one of her friends, so it's not all that bad. I'm off to get the oil changed in my car, then back for a nap, then off again to see Pablo Fransico!! Yay! I'm super-excited! Love to all!!

    * I guess I added pictures to the photo thing? I don't know havn't been here in awhile. New stuff throws me off...

    ~manajo

Saturday, July 29, 2006

  • So just so no one thinks I'm dead, I'm gonna update. It's gonna be short b/c I'm in a horrible mood. Anyways, the youth group was in Oklahoma this past week on work trip. It was amazing to say the least. I met so many people that I know I'm gonna stay connected with, it's crazy. On a sadder note, I leave for college in two weeks. August 12th. I'm scared outta my mind, but I would be insane not to be. I've been talkin to my roommate through e-mails for about a month. She sounds really cool and I can't wait to meet her. Finally more girls interested in engineering! I don't just hafta talk to kevin about it! Nah, I love kevin... he's my bestest friend. Ok I'm done here. I will try to update at least one more time before I leave... misted the packing and tears...

    I love you all.

    manajo 

Friday, July 14, 2006

Top Tags - Weblog

[no tags]

cutmedeep69

  • Visit cutmedeep69's Xanga Site
    • Member Since: 2/12/2005

Weblog Archives

Don't worry - your calendar is here… to see it in action just click "Save" above and refresh the page.

About Me

  • I will be a Junior at UMR (M S&T) in the fall and crazy busy all the time. I love it! I am happily in love with my Michael. I love trying new things and such. I am blonde, crazy and love it!!

Pulse

Recommended

[no recommendations]