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| a part of me is missing... actually 4 parts of me are missing. and they were all very smart. and they all lived in my mouth. it hurts without them. i actually look 50 pounds heavier now that i've lost them. and did i mention it really hurts without them? :( i've resorted to popping pills to make me curl up in bed all day just so i don't have to think about them being lost. who knew it would be this bad? *sigh*
other than the aforementioned tragedy, i've FINALLY finished reading His Dark Materials by Philip Pullman. it took a really long time to read because i could never get myself to finish it. i kept putting it down for weeks before i would be able to pick it up to read another hundred pages and then put it back down. you'd think that would make me feel sort of disconnected from the characters and the meaning of the story... WRONG. that book is the shit, and i would recommend it to anyone. all i know is that i closed last page of the book feeling just a little bit more self-aware and very conscious of the world that i live in. it's the kind of book that makes you believe that everything you do MEANS something. and yes it does feed my belief in soulmates and all that good stuff... i hate giving stuff away and hyping the stuff up that i love so i'll stop there. i just feel very enriched from finishing that book, and i can't hold it in!
okay, i need to pop another pill now, forreal. this pain is getting to be almost unbearable.
sighhhh | | |
| more weird physical symptomswhile i know i'm catering to my semi-hypochondriac nature right now, i'm still going to say that there is definitely something wrong with my throat. i've been saying it. it started with these tinglies that i couldnt explain. now that i don't reallie feel sick anymore, my throat is STILL very sore, dry, and feels like there is a lump in it. it hurts to swallow too...
k i just checked friggin webmd, the bane of me. i am now convinced that i should be going to the doctor sometime soon. GREAT. | | |
| time to say thanks... againi should be wrapping all the still-tagged items that are sitting in piles of shopping bags all over the house... but i'm avoiding it and writing in here. christmas will have to wait haha.
in reality though, i seriously feel like christmas came out of nowhere. i coulda sworn it was the day after thanksgiving and i was shopping for presents. now it's the day before christmas eve, and i'm still shopping for presents? haha damn. wtf. where does the time go?
all in all, xmas shopping was more enjoyable for me this year. it's nice saving money with a job that will allow me to do that hahahah. it's exciting finding things that you think "damn this is so (insert name here)." i just hope people will like what i found. =)
in a couple weeks, it'll be 2oo8, and i'm pretty pumped. i've always told myself that if there is a time for changes, it's always now, and you don't have to wait for 12:01 of the next year to make it happen. but it's still exciting nonetheless. it'll be funny to see all the people at the gym next month who will be making the same new year's resolution as me and just about everyone else in the world. i'll also look forward to everyone being just a little happier, nicer, and more positive.
i don't know if i mentioned i had reallie great friends. i do. with all the stuff going on with me, i know who loves me and who is worth it to keep around in my life... and no it doesn't only include people i see every day or people i even talk to a lot. i told a friend from high school the other day, "i think that once you are close to someone, you'll always have the capability of being that close again, no matter how far away or how long it takes you to talk again." yes, people change a lot, even in a matter of months, but it really is just about the chemistry between two people that allows you to be close or not. that's just my opinion... so with that said, i'm super thankful for the people that i've ever had that chemistry with. hahahha
merry almost christmas eve! | | |
| hello worldi've been semi-MIA lately from the xanga world. my bizzle. i feel like a lot has been going on lately. november and so far, december have been really busy. everyone's getting ready for christmas, and it's been fun... minus the fact that i can't seem to find presents for about 10 ppl on my list. i swear, i think too much about whether or not ppl will like stuff haha. too much of a people pleaser, i guess.
a few highlights:
[[ thanksgiving with the fam ]]
i'm seeing my cousins less frequently the older we get. everyone's starting to work, and people's college lives are busier. too bad we didn't take another signature cousin pic this year. must wait for christmas :)
[[ seeing jinky! ]]
she says we haven't seen each other in about 15 years. holy crap, right? i swear i almost tackled her when i saw her haha. house of prime rib was GOOOOOOD. x)
i've been shopping a lot lately and coming out with fewer things than the amount of time i actually spend shopping. i'm a terrible shopper and need to be schooled forreal.
i'm moving forward on this semi-detox diet haha. i'm super surprised at the amnt of lbs i've lost since mid-november. i was like wtf when i looked at the scale last week hahahhaa. no complaints, though. :) just need to make sure i keep it up. i've felt fat again the past 2 days haha...
to the people who actually care to read this, i'm sorry for not being around a lot lately. it's been a crazy month for me in a lot of ways. i feel like 2008 is going to be huge for me...
later bulges. | | |
| that time of the yearso. tired.
i want to get away but at the same time i want to be here.
i want to see my friends but at the same time i'm feeling antisocial.
i want to talk about stuff but at the same time i don't know what to say.
i want to start working out again but at the same time i'm exhausted.
i miss things. a lot.
oh life. where fore art thou?
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