will someone tell me why i can't be beautiful?  or why it can never work for me?

hmmm...i'm thinking about something i shouldn't be thinking about.    and it sucks because i shouldn't be like this.

new xanga...love_me_in_the_morning

i seem to be of no importance to most people anyway.

Currently Playing Schizophonic By Geri Halliwell see related

i talked to him...

about everything she said...and the way she made me feel about all of this.  its nice to know someone wants me to die.  and for someone to think i would help her (ex) boyfriend cheat on her.  no.  however, i will let you know that you can hate me as you will...you can talk about me all you want.  it only makes me stronger.  he makes me stronger.  and can't ignore what feels right.  i won't deny myself happiness anymore.  he means so much to me.  and i'm sorry for that.  but i can't ignore my feelings.  and i'm not backing down.  hate me all you want to.  but is it really worth it?  in the long run.  i just wanted to let you know.

thanks to lani and nicki for helping me get the guts to tell him how i was feeling and what was going on.  you kids mean the world to me.  screw the world...THE UNIVERSE...haha.  thanks so much...its really means a lot to me to know ya'll got my backs.  and you too sophia...you helped me put all the words together.  and now its all okay.  and i owe it to you.  i <3 you kids more than ever.  i owe you all good times now.

and you...you just make it all better.    just to hear you say "dont worry about it...it'll be okay" makes me feel 8930821484931824547230578472572304957570423 times better...and thats a lot.  you make me laugh...you make me cry too...but its always fun.

today really tested me...but i made it.

and i will tomorrow...

this is stupid.

i hate it.

it sucks.

game over.

Currently Playing If U C Jordan By Something Corporate see related

late night talks on the phone are great.

i'm so glad everything is okay.

one point for the brittany team.