| so...umm...im at a loss. this is one of those few times i really have no idea what to do. i dont know whats right. if i stay things might get better, or they could continue to decline. but what if i leave and i realize that i really do love him. if i go i could just be setting myself up for dissapointment. but i could be starting something wonderful. i need something. some kind of sign. to let me know what i should do. im lost im lost im lost. this feeling in my stomach is killing me. |
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| do you ever feel like your the worst person in the whole world. one little thing sets you off and then you think back to all the bad things youve done in your life and you just let it all come down on you. thats how i feel right now. i cant shake this feeling that latley ive been this terrible person living 4 different lives none of which i feel like ive been doing good in. ive only been doing bad. or at least thats how i feel. ive been so selfish and greedy and only been thinking about myself. i think the worst part about all of this is that i am aware of how selfish i am but i dont really do anything about it. right now im juggleing too many things. i cant wait for summer. it cant come soon enough |
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| so i smashed my car into a median on the highway. it was scary and my airbags went off. im okay. my car on the other hand is not. blah |
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| im pretty much dieing right now. i feel like shit. oh my god please save me. |
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| recap of the year! well it started out awesome. hotel party and all that. but that quickly went to shit. very quickly. the first three months or so were pretty boring. grounded. once school ended things got better. i started haning out with amber all the time and some others as well. kirbys grandmas house. dance parties. amanda leaving for a month. matthew leaving. getting my car!!! school started again and that was cool. partying less. thats pretty much how the end of this year has gone. all in all it was a pretty good year.
HAVE A HAPPY NEW YEAR! |
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