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| HOW MARRIAGE IS TO BE VIEWED AS A COVENANT Society today has been bombarded with false doctrines and a focus on feelings and emotions rather than the truth found in the Scriptures. The stability of a marriage has been attacked by a postmodern mindset and the inability of commitment found in culture. The self-centered, me-first generation plague has become an epidemic that is not only tolerated by the American Church, but embraced as well. What was once a taboo and shameful act, divorce is now ostentatiously flaunted with the excuse that marriage was not the picture perfect Hollywood ending that was imagined. In a human sexuality class in the University of Texas, over half of the class of over one hundred students, believed that “falling out of love” was legitimate grounds for divorce.
This epidemic has not spared the American Church, but it runs amuck. The leadership in the Church turns a blind eye towards this problem in fear of attendance rates dropping and conflicts rising in the church. The postmodern mindset is not only destroying families but the Church as well. With the church “divorcing” their doctrines from Christ’s very word, it is not surprising to see how marriages find it acceptable to follow suite with the same example in their own lives. In order to see how marriage is a covenant, rather than a contract that can be voided, the very example of Christ being wed to the Church has to be addressed. Glorifying God needs to become top priority and our selfish desires must take a backseat.
The Postmodern Poison
It seems to be a stretch to associate a postmodern thinking as one of the perils that is destroying marriages today. The truth of the matter is, with postmodern thinking, the “blurriness” and “mystery” of the Scripture leaves the individual readers to “bind and loose” the truths they desire to apply in their very lives. According to Rob Bell, Jesus Christ gives “his followers the authority to make new interpretation of the Bible.” He comes to this conclusion in Matthew 18:18 where Christ says, “Truly I say to you, whatever you bind on earth shall have been bound in heaven; and whatever you loose on earth shall have been loosed in heaven” (NASB). This opens the doors to proof texting and eisogesis of the Word of God. This postmodern mindset allows the readers to ignore the “archaic” teachings in order to maintain the modern societal trends. The American Church needs to address the issues of truth through biblical, expository preaching of the Word of God, not a watered down wishy-washy feel good message. The focus of preaching must go back to the cross in order to not only save marriages, but to also save itself from the dangers of disassociating itself as the bride of Christ.
The postmodern society has traded truth away for emotions, feelings, and experience. The Word of God is no longer necessary as long as the experience of God is there to guide the way. This theological fallacy allows the truth of the Gospel to become emasculated, taming it down to the level where it becomes pliable, malleable, and essentially relative. The absolute truth is no where to be found. With this type of mindset, it is of no surprise to see marriage being lived out in every which way except as a covenant between each other and to God. When the feelings and emotions fade, marriage becomes an irritating chore that produces little satisfaction and happiness for the spouse. This happens because, “the main idol is self, and its main doctrine is autonomy, and its central act of worship is being entertained, and its two main shrines are the television and the cinema, and its most sacred genuflection is the uninhibited act of sexual intercourse.” A God-centered, covenant marriage is no longer satisfying when the spouse is no longer satisfied by God.
How Covenant Marriage is Biblical
God intended marriage to be a reflection of His glory. It is God’s doing, and it is a display of Him. From the beginning the idea that marriage as a covenant was clearly stated. It states in Genesis 2:23, “The man said, ‘This is now bone of my bones, And flesh of my flesh; She shall be called Woman, Because she was taken out of Man.” Eugene Roop states Walter Brueggemann findings that, “‘bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh’ when used elsewhere in the Old Testament describes a covenant which two parties enter. Genesis 2:24 builds on this covenantal formula. To become ‘one flesh’ describes a union of utter solidarity.” This covenant involves more than an agreement between two people verbally or contractually. It involves the very essence of the man and woman. Their lives are no longer their own, but instead it is shared between the two. God intended marriage to ultimately act as one function that glorifies God. “Unlike the contract, which is primarily an agreement with the State, the covenant is primarily a relation entered into by the couple, but always ‘in the presence of God and this congregation.’ The congregation is called upon to ‘do all in your power to support and uphold this marriage in the years ahead.’ In the Christian institution, the community commits itself to sustain and enhance the covenantal relation, the becoming one flesh of the couple.” The covenant is not separate from the body of Christ. They are to encourage and uphold the marriage. This is done through the love and obedience of the members of the church, but more importantly this is done through the truths that the scriptures proclaim. The church needs to uphold marriage as a covenant and refuse to accept and allow divorce within the congregation. The church must feel the weight of the words in Matthew 19:6 when Christ says, “So they are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate” (NASB).
Not Just Sticking Together
Marriage as a covenant does not strictly end in a couple staying together “’til death do us part,” but in fact it is the beginning of the covenant. If you look at Israel’s relationship with God in the Old Testament, mere lip service was not what God wanted from them (Hosea 6:6; Amos 5:21-23). Having a couple stay together because of the kids or because it is morally wrong to separate, has no favor in God’s eyes unless the marriage is filled with covenant love. Lip service is not what a covenant entails. It requires the very essence and being of the person to carry through the covenant faithfully until the very end. “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her, so that He might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word.” The call at hand requires much more than living under the same roof or sharing the same bed. Christ’s love for the church is not merely lip service, but the sacrifice of his very life. Therefore the church’s whole essence is not to just speak the name of God, but in fact exalt Him and give Him all glory, honor, and power. The Church needs to be faithful to the covenant in order for the body to pattern their own covenant with their spouse. Their marriage should not be a marriage that feels forced together, but instead it should be one where two people imitate the same covenant of Christ and the church. Through this example, nonbelievers are able to witness a tangible, self-sacrificing, scriptural love that is portrayed between the husband and the wife. This marriage becomes a display of God. The covenant bond between the husband and the wife will ultimately point to the covenant between Christ and the church.
A violation of the covenant holds tremendous consequences for the two parties. Eugene Roop states, “The marriage covenant is not to be violated. There are no or almost no reasons that justify the dissolution of the marriage. Violation of the marriage covenant carries with it judgment in form of pain, suffering, and misery.” God has set up protective barriers for the covenant of marriage through the Ten Commandments. “Violations of that covenant are forbidden as reflected in the prohibition, ‘you shall not commit adultery.’ Indeed such violations of the relationship are punishable by death.” God gives us this covenant with the intentions to keep and uphold it. Ultimately, following the covenant brings the marriage and the family to the obedience and Lordship of Christ. When Christ rules over the family, blessings and peace will rain down. Marriage will not be any easier, but it will show a clearer and more accurate picture of the greatness of Christ’s love to the church. As Christ keeps his covenant to his church, we must keep our covenant with our spouse and with Christ.
Conclusion
From the beginning of scripture, God makes it very clear that marriage is a covenant relationship. Through this covenant relationship, the marriage would be able to reflect the same covenant relationship as Christ and the church. Why many marriages in today’s society fail is due to the ever growing postmodern mindset. The emotional-driven, malleable, "what feels good" philosophy gives way for marriages to end in divorce simply because it no longer feels like “love.” The church is not immune to such poison either. As the church continues to water down the scripture and become heavily dependent on strategizing, activities, and superficial fellowship, it opens the gateway for believers to gain a twisted sense of what a marriage should look like. They are no longer equipped to fight the devil and His temptations with the Word of God and instead fall into the same trap as the rest of the world. The Church must carry out faithfully their covenant with Christ if they are to see changes within marriages, for the very covenant of marriage patterns after the covenant between Christ and the Church. This requires the Church to use scripture for teaching, reproof, correction, and training in righteousness, as Paul advised the young pastor in 2 Timothy. Once we see Church faithfully live out her covenant with Christ, we will see covenants lived out between a man and his wife.
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| It would be a waste of $186 if i can't use this for a sermon in the futureI was livid, there was no doubt about it. In my mind, I felt like there was no way I would be dumb enough to cut off a cop. I replay the scenario time and time again, only coming to the conclusion that he was far enough for me to merge in. He didn't see it that way, and I must have ticked him off somehow. I believe that the story had to be in between mine and his if I want to be perfectly honest. It was on a local road in Sealy, TX and I had to get some gas. Therefore in my mind, he had to be traveling no faster than 40 mph (granted he wasn't speeding). I probably had to make him brake (purely accidental), but I doubt he had to "slam on my brakes to avoid you." He is the cop and I am not. I gave him and excuse to give a ticket, and he took it. I continued him making a phone call to vent. I can't believe I just got another ticket in a year. I never get tickets and then I go on this amazing streak of unluckiness. The last ticket I received was purely accidental with a HORRIBLE hidden left turn only light. Janel can attest to that, she didn't see the light either. Finally, I call my mom and just let loose. I was furious! I can't believe this is happening to me again! I made it very clear to my mom that I don't make a habit of speeding (I go 65 on the hwy, I hear that is the optimal speed for saving gas and car efficiency), I rarely run YELLOW lights! Yet, I get pulled over and ticketed for small ridiculous things that I don't notice. Of course, now my record looks like I am some reckless driver. My mom keeps telling me that it is not a coincidence and there must be a reason why this happened. I thought my mom was crazy, but I decided to entertain the thought a little.
So I hit my knees and started praying. Honestly, I thought it was very odd. It is just a ticket, but with the convictions from Matthew 5 (since I taught it last tuesday), I started praying that I forgive this cop. I mean, honestly I felt that it could go either way (I could be in the total wrong for all I know, but that is besides the point). Then something hits me like a ton of bricks. Forgiveness is a lot harder than I realized. I could have potentially deserved this ticket, this cop was doing his job, etc. and I couldn't forgive him? Forgiveness might not even be in the question, because I could be completely wrong and he could have been completely right. It made me think about the wife of the missionary who was killed in Turkey. She was on the national stage and proclaimed forgiveness. I always hope that I could forgive such atrocities for the sake of the gospel, but I couldn't let go of the fact that I am having a tough time with something as minor as this. I couldn't stop being so angry, even though I spent hours upon hours not too long ago preparing for a Bible study about how sinful anger without cause was.
So I guess my mom was right, though I really wish Jesus had a different (and cheaper) way of showing me this. $186 comes cheap if I could have a chance to put to practice all the things I stand firm in.
*Disclaimer: Of course I still believe that I do not deserve to get that ticket, but I am also reasonable. I realize that my opinion is completely biased, but it was really an honest mistake and I will stand firm in saying that the car was far enough away and I DID NOT cut him off. The end! | | |
| I was walking back to the apartment after spending a couple hours at the gym playing basketball. It was a pretty difficult day, a common theme that I have had on the basketball court. I walked out feeling defeated and I decided to ease my mind with the one thing that I could depend on to escape from this cruel world, music. The music roared from my earphones as I walked back home. (I was actually listening to "That Thing You Do" by The Wonders, which is actually a movie where the drummer was the star of the show, gets the girl, etc. Every drummer's favorite movie. In fact it was actually another drummer that showed me the movie. Boy I miss drumming, I miss the days behind the set...oh sorry, back to the story). I cross guadeloupe, with my destination close at hand. The music was making me feel better and I escaped into a world where I will sometimes accidentally sing out loud do a little jig while walking. It is quite embarrassing. I really hope I never see any of yall when I walk around with my ipod. Suddenly, a sharp pain flares up from my left ankle. Did I just sprain my ankle again? You might say, "Dennis, don't be a fool. You were walking, how could you sprain your ankle?" I got one thing to say to you people, shut up, it can be done. I look down and I see a bee with its stinger lodged in my ankle. My first reaction was "THERE IS A BEE ON MY FOOT!" Then I realized, wait...it already stung me, what else can it do? NOTHING. That's right. You wasted your poor life stinging me. What a sucker. I yelped in pain and started limping. A couple that was walking by stopped and asked if I was okay. "I got stung by a bee" I told them. They told me to take the stinger out, and I was secretly hoping that one of them would help me take the stinger out. No such luck, I had to do it myself. I limped home and then I went to church. The pain is gone, but the memories remain. If that was too long, you can read the abridged version of my story below.
Abridged Version:
I was walking home and I got stung by a bee. My body was so strong that it consumed the pain and now I don't even feel it any more (knock on wood). In other news, some huge guy landed on my right knee today and I said "oh geez you are heavy!" It still hurts. The end.
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| Do People Even Blog Anymore?Do people even do this anymore? I am not going to try to bring xanga back, I am smarter than that. I've been going through some of my old entries, and I had some classics, so I am thinking... why write a new entry when I can just have plenty of THROWBACK entries! I mean comon now... my fat kid/broken chair entry was a classic. How about the story about how apt 104 got robbed and I had a GUN POINTED AT MY FACE. Talk about excitement chilling down your spine. I even had a whole xanga entry talking about how Michael Wang was such a "great" friend. My Valentine's Day entry a couple years back was pretty darn witty as well. I also had a picture I made on paint when I almost drowned in my swimming class. Man, I use to live such an interesting life. Almost drowning, getting robbed, breaking chairs, etc. When did my life become so boring? Michael keeps asking that I bring him entertainment via drama in my life. Sorry bud, my life is quite boring, we are going to have to live in the past to bring some entertainment.
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| Come On RainI was on my way home from Baltimore coming back from a family vacation. We had a connecting flight at Dallas/Fort Worth International Airport. Our flight was cancelled and we had to wait for the next flight that was 12 hours later. Why was the flight cancelled? Because of rain and thunderstorm. Steve Holy, I hope you got that freaking girl because I was stuck in DFW for over 12 HOURS!!!!
Come On Rain
By: Steve Holy
Come on rain
Pour on down
Flood that runway
Shut it down
She's in Dallas, waiting on a plane
Don't let her leave
Come on rain, come on rain
Chorus:
Unleash your fury, fill the sky
Let your clouds explode, go on and cry
your tears of mercy, give me time
Unlock your winds and let them blow
Let your lightning strike, your thunder roll
Heaven help me stop that plane
Come on rain
Don't let your storm clouds break
Like my heart if i'm too late
One hour is all im asking for
(yah..well you got 12 of mine)
Come on rain, let it pour
Repeat chorus
Now here you come
You heard my prayer
Give it all you've got, she's all i've got and I'm almost there
Repeat chorus
Heaven help me stop that plane
Come on rain
Come on rain
Come on rain
Come on rain
This is where you can find the cursed song.*
*disclaimer: I actually like the song...too bad it hits too close to home for me. Remember to be careful with what you ask for, God might just shut down the whole darn airport.
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