on the road again

a shower - in three pots

“Twentysomethings” who are they really?  We’re all so different.  We all live different types of lives.  I come from the “dirt poor, trying to survive, livin on a prayer” type.  So I can understand, while visiting friends here in indy, why the gas has been turned off at the house making all running water extremely cold.  I courageously decided to take a “shower” in the tub with three pots of water heated on the stove and a coffee cup.  The things we do to be clean, right?  I didn’t mind.  

 Sometimes I wonder if I’ll ever be able to be financially stable enough to live comfortably, and sometimes I wonder if I ever really want to be able to do that… there is something about the stories and lessons learned that come from the hard times

right now, truthfully, i am staying at my loving parents house, able to breathe and take a rest from clutching on to the harsh reality of trying to stay “a float” financially.  I realize I won’t be able to stay there forever but am thankful I have the ability to stay for a bit, while so many others don’t…  living out of my car, hopping from place to place and living with all boys has been, at times, a struggle but at least I had a roof over my head. 

I feel very blessed today.

             Try not to take blessings… and a nice warm shower… for granted. 

I know who I use to be,

Where I've come from,

And what I've done.

I know where I want to be,

Who I want to become,

And constantly dream of what my life might look like someday

But today I thought about  who I am right now

I struggled a bit to find the answer…

Always looking back or looking forward,

                regretting or dreaming

   I left for the day, to get out of the house

        Searching    for     something     defining

            T   o   d   a   y

  I love to drive down the highway with the sun on my face

                 through the hills of Pennsylvania

Pondering life, love, and happiness

 I walked through isles alone thinking about how I like quiet and don't need heightened drama that comes with a relationship

    Grabbed my soy milk and thought about how I don't think I would like to be alone 

f o r e v e r

Sipped a Sumatra while flipping through a good memoir and realized I have a pretty good life with only very minor tragedies. 

         concerned with environmental issues and social injustice, thought about what I will do to respond.

                   Decided to make and refashion more clothes than I buy this year.  Stretching my creativity and learning more of what I love

         Took gus for another walk and laughed out loud in the dark

             I like who I am today

Who I've become

         I'd paint a portrait with bright colors and a smile

i'm at a crossroads....  as they say. 

where to go next ~ i wish i could stay