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| 1. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE? The main character of Karate kid 2. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED?Over spring break when I watched a documentary about 9/11
3. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING? yeah for the most part 4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT? chicken 5. DO YOU HAVE KIDS? no
6. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU? oh yeah or maybe even more than friends.... yes I would do myself lol 7. DO YOU USE SARCASM ALOT? no!!!! never!
8. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS? yup
9. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP? maybe...
10. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL? fruity pebbles
11. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF? not really 12. DO YOU THINK YOU ARE STRONG? physcially sometimes, emotionally about 80% of the time
13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM? cookies and cream 14. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE? their teeth/smile 15. RED OR PINK? red 16. WHAT IS THE LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF? being hairy its a bitch to groom
17. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST? la familia
18. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO SEND THIS BACK TO YOU? i don't care 19. WHAT COLOR PANTS AND SHOES ARE YOU WEARING?basketball short and i'm barefoot
20. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE? amazingness from old chicago! 21. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW? Someone coughing outside my window
22. IF YOU WHERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE? probably some shade of blue
23. FAVORITE SMELLS? very sexy for him2 (I wear it, part of the reason i would do myself lol) 24. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE? James Scott aka Jimmy 25. DO YOU LIKE THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO YOU? yes because she said people that loved her would responded so i was obligated 26. FAVORITE SPORTS TO WATCH? curling... i think because i'm still trying to figure out how it is scored it just interests me for some odd reason lol
27. HAIR COLOR?golden blonde... thats right its not brown bitches! 28. EYE COLOR? Greenish blue 29. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS? no
30. FAVORITE FOOD? chicken
31. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS? Just about every movie has a happy ending but if its a good scary movie than that
32. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED? The Gathering
33. WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING? red
34. SUMMER OR WINTER? spring
35. HUGS OR KISSES? depends on who its for.
36. FAVORITE DESSERT? Cheese Cake
37. MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND? probably no one
38. LEAST LIKELY TO RESPOND probably everyone 39. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW? I haven't read a book in awhile. 40. WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSE PAD? its a dell mouse pad for my toshiba laptop and my microsoft mouse its kinda a cluster fuck of computer stuff but i like it.
41. WHAT DID YOU WATCH ON T.V. LAST NIGHT? hmm i don't remember
42. FAVORITE SOUND? music, rain, the ocean
43. ROLLING STONES OR BEATLES? rolling stones
44. WHAT IS THE FURTHEST YOU HAVE BEEN FROM HOME? LA!
45. DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT? all of them are dirty lol 46. WHERE WERE YOU BORN? Wichita, KS
47. WHOSE ANSWERS ARE YOU LOOKING FORWARD TO GETTING BACK? Anyone's | | |
| IF SANTA ANSWERED HIS MAIL HONESTLYDear Santa
I wud like a kool toy space ranjur fer Xmas. Iv ben a gud boy all Yeer. yer Frend, BiLLy
Dear Billy,
Nice spelling. You're on your way to a career in lawn care. How about I send you a frickin book so you can learn to read and write? I'm giving your older brother the space ranger. At least HE can spell!
Santa
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Dear Santa,
I have been a good girl all year, and the only thing I ask for is peace and joy in the world for everybody. Love, Sarah
Dear Sarah,
Your parents smoked pot when they had you, didn't they??
Santa
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Dear Santa,
I don't know if you can do this, but for Christmas, I'd like for my mommy and daddy to get back together. Please see what you can do?? Love Teddy
Dear Teddy,
Look, your dad's banging the babysitter like a screen door in a hurricane. Do you think he's gonna give that up to come back to your frigid mom, who rides his ass constantly? It's time to give up that dream. Let me get you some nice Legos instead.
Santa
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Dear Santa,
I want a new bike, a Playstation, a train, some G.I. Joes, a dog, a drum kit, a pony and a tuba. Love, Francis
Dear Francis,
Who names their kid "Francis" nowadays? I bet you're gay. I'll set you up with a Barbie.
Santa
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Dear Santa,
I left milk and cookies for you under the tree, and I left carrots for your reindeer outside the back door. Love, Susan
Dear Susan,
Milk gives me the runs and carrots make the deer fart in my face when riding in the sleigh. You want to do me a favor? Leave me a bottle of scotch.
Santa
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Dear Santa,
What do you do the other 364 days of the year? Are you busy making toys?? Your friend,
Thomas
Dear Thomas,
All the toys are made in China. I have a condo in Vegas, where I spend most of my time making low-budget porno films. I unwind by drinking myself silly and squeezing the asses of cocktail waitresses while losing money at the craps table. Hey, you wanted to know.
Santa
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Dear Santa,
Do you see us when we're sleeping, do you really know when we're awake, like in the song?
Love, Jessica
Dear Jessica,
Are you really that gullible? Good luck in whatever you do. I'm skipping your house.
Santa
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Dear Santa,
I really really want a puppy this year. Please please please PLEASE PLEASE could I have one? Timmy
Timmy,
That whiney begging shit may work with your folks, but that crap doesn't work with me. You're getting a sweater again.
Santa
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Dearest Santa,
We don't have a chimney in our house, how do you get into our home? Love, Marky
Mark,
First, stop calling yourself "Marky", that's why you're getting your ass whipped at school. Second, you don't live in a house, you live in a low-rent apartment complex. Third, I get inside your pad just like the boogeyman does, through your bedroom window. Sweet Dreams,
Santa | | |
| Dear Daniel,
Here is your single's love horoscope
for Monday, November 6:
It's not that you put on a big show wherever you go -- far from it. It's more that every person who sees you and talks to you feels so much better afterward. Who wouldn't want someone like you in their life? Ok Ok if this is really true then why do I feel the most lonely I have in awhile? Recently it seems to be one broken promise after another. And this isn't narrowed down to just one person either. It seems most of the people in my life are like this. I don't know how many times lately I've heard..."I'll call you" or "We will hang out this weekend" or "We should do something" and no one seems to be following through and that includes me. But it is kinda sad when people promise me something I have started to expect them to disappoint me. I would honestly rather someone not tell me they are going to do something that way its not a disppointment when it doesn't happen. Don't get me wrong... I understand that shit comes up and you can't always do what you wanted to do. Thats fine. But every fucking time. It just makes me wonder how much my friendship is valued. | | |
| Do u think u can read this with no problem? Go ahead have fun!!
I already knew this but its still kinda cool i cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno't mtaetr in waht oerdr the ltteres in a wrod are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it whotuit a pboerlm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Azanmig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt! if you can raed tihs rpsoet it.
Strange..isn't it? =)
| | |
| My brother cracks my shit up. Here is an email he has sent me its pretty funny. It has been brought to management's attention that some
individuals throughout the company have been using foul language during
the course of normal conversation with their co-workers. Due to complaints
received from some employees who may be easily offended, this type of
language will no longer be tolerated. We do however realize the critical
importance of being able to accurately express your feelings
when communicating with co-workers. Therefore, a list of 18 New and
Innovative "TRY SAYING" phrases has been provided so that proper
exchange of ideas and information can continue in an effective
manner.
1) TRY SAYING: I think you could use more training.
INSTEAD OF: You don't know what the f___ you're doing.
2) TRY SAYING: She's an aggressive go-getter.
INSTEAD OF: She's a ball-busting b__ch.
3) TRY SAYING: Perhaps I can work late.
INSTEAD OF: And when the f___ do you expect me to do this?
4) TRY SAYING: I'm certain that isn't feasible.
INSTEAD OF: No f______ way.
5) TRY SAYING: Really?
INSTEAD OF: You've got to be sh__ing me!
6) TRY SAYING: Perhaps you should check with...
INSTEAD OF: Tell someone who gives a sh__.
7) TRY SAYING: I wasn't involved in the project.
INSTEAD OF: It's not my f______ problem.
8) TRY SAYING: That's interesting.
INSTEAD OF: What the f___?
9) TRY SAYING: I'm not sure this can be implemented.
INSTEAD OF: This sh__ won't work.
10) TRY SAYING: I'll try to schedule that.
INSTEAD OF: Why the f____ didn't you tell me sooner?
11) TRY SAYING: He's not familiar with the issues.
INSTEAD OF: He's got his head up his a__.
12) TRY SAYING: Excuse me, sir?
INSTEAD OF: Eat sh__ and die.
13) TRY SAYING: So you weren't happy with it?
INSTEAD OF: Kiss my a__.
14) TRY SAYING: I'm a bit overloaded at the moment.
INSTEAD OF: F___ it, I'm on salary.
15) TRY SAYING: I don't think you understand.
INSTEAD OF: Shove it up your a__.
16) TRY SAYING: I love a challenge.
INSTEAD OF: This job sucks.
17) TRY SAYING: You want me to take care of that?
INSTEAD OF: Who the h___ died and made you boss?
18 ) TRY SAYING: He's somewhat insensitive.
INSTEAD OF: He's a pr_ck.
Thank You,
Human Resources | | |
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