So...my first entry in....a really long time....but yeah....i just need to talk....cuz i get like that...

Anyway.....so, seriously, my life is so amazing right now! I can't even begin to explain....God just works everything out....I'm so blessed. I mean, everything i wanted to happened happened to me, within two days! How cool is that? it's such a great way to end out my Junior year.....next year will be so incredible....SENIOR! But yeah....how many times does something like this happen to a person in one lifetime? It doesn't happen that often, i can assure you. but here I am, and for some reason, God is allowing me to have all these things. So cool. I'm just in a haze....I can't even believe all of it....

Wow. Okay. So, life is incredible right now. I mean, everything is as close to perfect as it's going to get. Except that I'm feeling confused like, all the time now. Not like I'm starting to lose my memory or something, but just about...life. In general. It's really weird. It's not like I'm confused because everything's going wrong....anyway, it's hard to explain.

I just feel like driving out to some deserted country road and screaming my lungs out where no one can hear me. Maybe that will help. ;)

Currently Listening Two Lefts Don't Make a Right.. But Three Do By Relient K Mood Rings see related

Guess what guys! Today is totally the first year anniversary of this Xanga site! I just noticed that out of the blue! Yay me!

Anyway....so I love how I scared everyone off with that last post....either that or Xanga has officially died. I hope not. Because I loathe Myspace and all those other blog thingys.

So....the play is over! And I'm sad, because we were totally just starting to bond when it was over. Hopefully we'll still talk throughout the year.

And...I could talk more, but I have to go to Awana and watch little children! Yes!

Talking. Conversations. Chatter. Discussion. Banter. Something so simple, something we go through every day without giving it a second thought. But what if we did give it a second thought?

Could you make a friend if you just stood around and stared at each other?
Could simple problems be solved if we all tried doing our own thing without any discussion?
Could you have a relationship with someone if you never talked about the really important things?

Talking is amazing.

People speak thousands of words every day, and do we throw most of them out, never to be recaptured, without thinking about the outcome first? Do we just have idle chatter with people to keep ourselves interested? Banter with someone because there's nothing better to do?

Well, the answer would be yes. But there's nothing wrong with idle chatter, or good natured teasing. But if you were to think to all your closest friends, I think you would find that at sometime or the other, you have had some kind of heart-to-heart talk with them. One where some secret part of you that most people don't see was poured out to them. I find that once you have a conversation with someone like that, you can't help but grow closer. Maybe you weren't face-to-face, but over e-mail, or instant messenger, anything. There's still a common bond between you now. If you've had an experience like this, you know what I'm talking about when I say that some of my favorite memories aren't the crazy parties, or the water fights, or things like that. It was when everything was quiet, and you just talked. Nothing else. Just let down the wall we put up so people can't see that we really do have feelings, and really care about things, instead of that carefree, don't give a care person you try so hard to be.

And so we all agree that we've had times like that, and it made our lives better by far. But if we can pour out our hearts to our friends, who are just people like us, why is it so hard for us to talk to God? Why can't we just stop and take time out of our day just to spend time with him. Not the quick prayers where we list off all our problems, and ask for a solution, but just talking to God. If you sit quietly, God will talk back. Has God ever spoken to you? His words are a million times more precious that anything our friends can say, yet we cast Him off to spend time with them rather than Him? Why are our guards always up around God? Because guess what....He already knows what you try to hide. So you might as well talk with Him openly, rather than slinking around trying to shrink behind your Christian facades.

I think most of us would agree that America needs a revival. But how will that ever come if we never talk to the one who controls everything? And not just as the jolly benefactor would is oh-so-happy to grant us our every wish, but as a close friend who loves us. Aren't you always more willing to help a close friend, than someone who only talks to you when there's something in it for them? Who are we to think God is any different? He passionately desires our fellowship, and we can't just expect Him to fix the world if we aren't willing to do our part.