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| Ah... The weekend was awesome. Got drunk on
Friday night at Golden, then went to Mardi Gras on Saturday night and
got absolutely smashed. Yeah, nobody rocks the cuff-links like I do. Bitches.
Yeah, that shit was fun. (Open bar--need I say
more? Screw it, I will anyway.) A bunch of people from school were
there, and we all sat at one table. We were the youngest and drunkest
table there. That shit was beyond awesome. Everybody was dancing, too.
I usually can't stand dancing, but shit, that shit was great. They
played a lot of Tarkan towards the end of my time there.
But yeah, the open bar... Damn, that shit was
awesome. That bartender was crazy, too. I asked for a rum and coke, so
he fills the glass halfway (no joke) with Bacardi Superior and then
adds some coke. Then one of my mom's friends whom I haven't seen in
years decided that since I was who I was (my mom's son), I couldn't
have anymore to drink. I was about to be like, "Bitch, get yo' hands
off mah rum n' coke." Yeah, come to think of it, that would've been
cool. Didn't do it, though. Her husband was hilarious--he was off his
ass and rambling about how I should give him a call if I ever need a
friend. Yeah, sounds kind of disturbing now, but it was funny as hell
at the time, particularly because nobody had a fucking clue as to what
he was talking about.
Yeah, that shit was great. I could definitely
get used to shit like that. Too bad that kind of thing rarely ever
happens here. Oh well. Cigarette, then shower, then bed. Peace.
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| Eh, weather warmed up slightly today. It's still freakin' cold, but now we're getting rain instead of snow.
It's been a fairly uneventful while since I last updated. The teams went to Incirlik last weekend, but that's about the only thing that's happened. (FYI, it was pretty homo. I got to see a couple old friends, but the weather was crappy and there wasn't anything to do.) I've spent most of my time chilling in my room and writing songs. God, the depressing crap I can come up with when given a guitar, a pen and a notebook... Oh well. Maybe it'll all make me some money someday.
Anyway, there's some sort of faux Mardi Gras party at the Hilton this Saturday. Provided that I'm not sick (which was why I didn't attend the Marine Ball), I'm getting smashed off my ass. My mom already said she doesn't care and that it's an "open bar"-type thing. Kick-ass. I get to dress up and down a shitload of Jack Daniel's.
As for everything else that's happening, school's gay, my parents are the same, we still have no food in the house and I'm still pining over the loss of our APO address. Yeah, that about covers everything, so... I'm going out for a cigarette. Peace.
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| Holy crap. Another snow day. It's windy and
snowing super-fuckin'-hard out there. It must really suck to be a
pigeon right now.
Sadly enough, that's really all there is to tell for now.
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| Eh. I've just realized what a fucking idiot
I've been. I really need to chill out and stop overreacting. This isn't
to say that I don't still have issues with the universe, because the
whole reverse-karma thing really does piss me off, but shit, I gotta stop stop stressing so damn much.
Anyway, onto happier shit...
Today's a snow day. About fuckin' time. Looks
like the new support facility commander recognizes the perils of
driving on icy roads with a bunch of drivers who suck at driving as it
is and never put chains on their tires. All the papers are predicting a
shitload of snow for the next couple of days, too. Who knows, maybe
we'll luck out tomorrow and have another snow day. Unfortunately,
though, there's nothing good on TV. Screw it, I'll go to the gym.
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| I figured that since I'm actually bothering to
update, I might as well let the world know how pissed off I am at
everything.
I just can't figure this out. No matter how
much good shit I do, some kind of reversed karma comes around and bites
me in the ass. I give some guy a cigarette out on the street, I get
screwed over by a cab driver. I buy somebody a beer, I lose my keys.
This shit's starting to get old.
I keep hearing this "what goes around comes
around" shit and how doing good deeds for others means good things in
your future. You know what, though? The universe seems content to keep
ramming the proverbial broomstick up my ass instead of throwing
something good my way once in a while. Here are some examples from last
summer:
1) Second Session: A friend of mine was going
through some shit, so he came to my room and we talked about all the
shit that was bugging him, I gave him some Jack Daniel's, and I told
him that if he ever needed to talk to anybody that I was there to
listen. Next day I came down with a mild case of food poisoning and got
bitched at by seventy percent of the staff for something or other. I'm
not exaggerating when I say that nothing good happened that day--the
entire day sucked.
2) First Session: I give a broke friend of
mine the rest of my cigarettes. I go back to the dorm a couple minutes
later, then go to the laundry room to get my clothes out of the dryer,
and the door's stuck. It was two or three days before the door could be
opened.
3) First Session: I lend a friend a CD. My headphones break.
4) Italy Week: I lend a girl I like a couple
euros for a drink. She fucks one of my roommates the same night--while
I'm in the room.
5) First Session: I lend my friend some
laundry detergent. I come back to the room to brush my teeth and my
roommate has just taken the worst-smelling shit I have ever
encountered. Opening the bathroom door to let it air out just made the
room smell like shit, even with all the big-ass windows open.
6) Italy Week: Some girl in the group asks me
to play "Wonderwall" for the hundredth fucking time that day, so I do
and then go to one of the old churches to see the artwork and say a
quick prayer. It closes five minutes before I get there. Had I not
played that fucking song, I could have at least gone in, taken like,
two photos, prayed really quickly and gotten the fuck out.
There are lots of other examples, but those
are the six that really pissed me off. I know it all seems
insignificant; no big deal, they're all just little things. Well,
little things pile up to become big things. That's what's happening now.
Here are some examples from the past couple of months:
1) I hold the door open for one of the
kapicis, who's carrying boxes, even though he's treated my family like
shit ever since we moved in. I get in a cab, go to Renewa and fuck up
my knee getting out.
2) I go down to the supermarket to pick up some cookies for my dad since
his lazy ass didn't want to, I come up the street, trip on a piece of
concrete on the sidewalk and cut up my hand on some glass shards in the
ground (and then get bitched at by my mom when I walk in the door).
3) I come home last week to try to clear the
air with my parents (huge fight a few days before and all that) and
they were asleep, so I figure I'll do it the next day. I had every
intention of clearing the air, I just didn't have the chance to do it,
so there was still good in that, especially because my mom wanted me to
come home. But anyway, I go out the next evening and my girlfriend says
she wants to take a "break" because we've both got lots of shit to deal
with and won't have a lot of time to commit to each other. I'm cool
with that--but it turns out it was a huge crock of crap and she didn't
give a rat's ass. I'm not heartbroken by any means, but being lied to
about shit like that really pisses me off.
I could be the friendliest motherfucker around and
throw my money at people to pay for all their beers and tickets and
help them out with whatever shit they need help with (people I don't
know, mind; I wouldn't even think about not doing any of that for my
friends), and still the universe will knock me upside the cock with a bunch of new problems I don't need to deal with and shouldn't be dealing with (under the principles of karma). I try to do good, I try be good, and I keep getting screwed.
And then there all these asswipes who all spew this "optimistic
outlook" shit at me and I feel like tearing their throats out with my
teeth and eating them. For any and all of you out there who are reading
this and planning to spoon-feed me more of that crap about optimism,
you have been warned--if I come into contact with you, I will kill you.
And no, I'm not joking. Your bullshit is among the last things I need
right now.
For all of you who like reading me bitch about
shit, you'll be pleased to know that there's a lot more in store in the
days to come. For the rest of you, you can all eat shit and die. I'm
Johnny Kunstadter, saying, "Good night and go to hell."
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