Kabanata Isa  : “Uhh… Ba’t Ganon?”

Mayroon akong dalawang tao na malapit sa akin at, sa tingin ko’y, napaka importante sa buhay ko. Pero hindi ako mapalagay… Mahal ko silang dalawa, pero mas magiging maluwag ang pakiramdam ko kung malaman ko lang kung anong klaseng pagmamahal ang nararamdaman ko kay Cael at Sid. Ano bang klaseng pagmamahal ang meron ko kay Kael at ano naman ang kay Sid? Hay…Mga tanong, oo…

August 15, 2005, Monday. Laking tuwa ko ng pumasok ako sa klasrum dahil hindi ako na-late. Bihira lang mangyari sa’kin ‘yun!. 8:30am ang simula ng leson pero nakarating ako ng 8. As usual, ang una kong narinig ay ang walang katapusang halakhakan ng mga kaklase’t kaibigan ko. Hindi na talaga sila nagsawa. But what can I do! Guys will be guys. At, sa tingin ko, masaya rin ang sense of “company”. One has to NOT be alone sometimes.

Nakita ko rin na naandoon na pala si Cael. Palagi siyang maaga. Medyo lumundag yung puso’t kalamnan ko dahil ang gwapo-gwapo niya at di ko mawari kung gaano siya kalakas sa akin. Si Cael Natividad ay di gaanong matangkad, pero mas matangkad siya sa’kin (maliit lang kasi ako e…) Maganda ang kanyang mata at makinis ang mukha. Fair ang kanyang balat at di gaanong payat, di gaanong mataba, tama lang. Mahaba ang kanyang buhok, hanggang sa balikat. Medyo magulo nga ito pero yun ang nagpapa-panalo sa image niya. Nakita ko siya na tumatawa sa mga jokes ng kanyang mga kasama. Gusto kong ngumiti at mamula pero pinaandar ko na lang ang pagtago ko ng emosyon. Dumaan ako na parang ‘wala lang’ kasi kunwari manhid ako.

“Oy, Ashley! Aga natin a!” tinawag ako ni Romel. Eto naman si Romel Padigan. Payat siya, medyo matangkad, nagsasalamin (kulay dark blue lang ang outline sa ilalim ng  glass at sa ibabaw ay wala…) Fair-skinned at maikli ang buhok ngunit nakababa ito, mga two to three inches and haba ng kada strand ng kanyang buhok. Nakaupo sa isang sulok si Romel, nagdo-drawing ng puno na may prutas at ahas ng nakita niya akong ilagay ang bag sa arm-chair harap sa kung saan siya nakapwesto.

“Uy…” sinagot ko ang katanungan. “Ayus lang. Nagtitipid ako e kaya ibang ruta ang sinubukan ko. Yung isang ruta kasi mas makakatipid ako, hehehe,” sabi ko habang tinitignan ko ang kanyang drawing

Bigla akong napatingin sa pwesto nina Cael. Nagulat ako kasi nagkatinginan kami ni Cael kungkaya’t tumingin na ako agad sa ibang direksyon, kunwari may nakitang kaaya-ayang view sa labas ng window kahit wala naman.

Madalas ko ng nahuhuli si Cael na tumitingin sa direksyon ko. Ang kapal din naman siguro ng mukha ko kung inisip ko na tumitingin siya sa akin. Pero inisip ko talaga ang mga possibilities na hindi pupwede na maging pawing “coincidence” lang iyon. (Masyadong marami ang mga iyon kaya’t hindi ko na ibabahagi hehe..) Pero ayun nga, ba’t ba tingin ng tingin yun sa’kin? Siguro ang pangit ko kaya ganoon. Anyway, emotion-less mode na lang ako nung nagsimula ang mga so-called ‘Staring Frenzies’.

Pagkatapos ng morning class na natapos from 8:30am to 11:30am ay lumabas na kami para kumain. Dapat sasabay ako sa kada ko: Eloy, Lea, Cael, Matthew, Sandy, Bea, , Choy, Andy, Saza, Jod, Mot at Ed, ng kinalabit ako ni Zen, kaklase ko rin (buhok ay parang kay Wa Ze Lei ng F4, may pink na clip, maliit, at Tan-skinned.

“Uy Ash! Sabay ka sa’min ngayon kumain!”

“Bakit? Sabay ako kina Saza ngayon e, bukas na lang…”

“Sasama si Sid sa’min ngayon!”

“O?” Lumaki ang mga mata ko sa sindak.

“Oo! Tas kausapin mo. Diba sabi mo mismo sa’kin na gusto mo mag-sorry sa kanya dahil dun sa nangyari nung Thursday?” sabi ni Zen habang inaayos ang kanyang bag na nakasuot na sa kanyang balikat.

Nag-isip ako noon habang sinabi sa akin ni Zen. Oo, totoo na gusto kong mag-sorry. Medjo nag-away yata kami ni Sid nung araw na iyon. Iyon na ata ang isa mga pinaka-ayaw ko na araw, ng magsabi si Sid ng isang bagay na ayaw kong marinig.

Sinabi ko kay Zen na sasabay ako sa kanila. Pinuntahan ko sina Saza at sinabi na hindi ako sasabay sa kanila. Nakita ko sa aking peripheral vision sa bandang kanan na nakatitig lang si Cael sa direksyon ko, nanaman, na parang di maintindihang bato. Nag-babay ako sa kanila at pati na rin kay Cael. Itinaas lang niya ang kanyang ulo, senyales na nag-babay rin siya.

Nakarating na kami sa “InKa”, isa sa mga masasarap na karinderya malapit sa building namin. Di nagtagal ay sumunod si Sid. Nakita kong palakad papunta sa’min. Naka-back-pack, maikli ang buhok, pero mas mahaba ang length kaysa kay Romel (yung buhok parang nakabalot sa kanyang mukha…) Di rin gaanong matangkad pero mas matangkad si Cael sa kanya. Tama lang din ang katawan, medjo maputi at cute ang face niya.

Nakita ako ni Sid at napansin ko na umiba ang kanyang mukha ng Makita niya ako. Umupo siya sa tabi ko at nag-greet sa akin. Nag-greet din ako sa kanya habang kinukuha ko ang pera sa wolet ko. Sa isip-isip ko, ang tanga ko nanaman dahil gusto ko ng sumbatin ang salitang “Sorry Sid!” pero parang may pumipigil.

“Musta?” biglang nagsalita si Sid. Nakatingin siya sa’kin at sa wolet na hinahalungkat ko.

“Okay naman, ayun medjo nakakatulog na” sinabi ko habang medjo natatawa. Natawa rin ng kaunti si Sid.

“Ako nga rin walang tulog. May tinapos akong plate na kailangan bukas. Nagkamali ako kaya inulit ko. Bad trip nga e…” sabi ni Sid habang inayos ang kanyang buhok at tumingin sa kanyang harap.

Tinignan ko si Sid at bigla kong sinumbat ang kanyang pangalan…

Lumingon ulit si Sid sa akin at tinanong niya kung bakit.

Nailabas ko na ang “Sorry Sid!” sa bibig ko. Nasabi ko na ang Sorry na ginusto kong sabihin. Nagtaka ako dahil natawa siya sa sinabi ko. Tinanong niya kung bakit ako nagso-sorry sa kanya.

“E kasi diba? Binabara kita…” sabi ko habang nakatingin sa baba. Nung mga oras na iyon, hindi yata ako tumitingin sa kanya pero napansin ko na tumitingin siya sa akin na parang super attentive niya. “…Bara ako ng bara sa mga jokes mo. Hindi ko talaga sinasadya. Hindi ko nga maintindihan kung bakit ko ginawa yun. Hindi naman kasi ako talaga ganon…” Nakatingin na ako sa baba, halatang hindi makatingin sa mga mata ni Sid.

“Okay lang yun!” biglang sabi ni Sid. Tinap nya ako ng dalawang beses sa kanang balikat gamit ang kaliwang kamay niya. Nagtawanan na lang kaming dalawa at sabay kaming nag-order ng makakain.

Naging maayos na ulit kaming dalawa ni Sid. Nagkwentuhan kami ng kung anu-anong mga bagay. Mas marami kaming napag-usapan di tulad nung mga nakaraang mga araw na limitado lang ang mga topics na pinag-usapan.

“Ash…”

May lalaki na tumawag sa likod ko. Nagulat ako kasi nakilala ko ang boses. Boses ni Cael. Lumingon ako agad para Makita, at oo tama ako na si Cael nga. At napatanong ako sa sarili kung ano ang ginagawa niya dito

“Uy! Asan sila Saza, Eloy?” tanong ko

“Ayun, nagka-Counter raw malapit dito e.” sabi ni Cael.

Lumingon bigla si Sid kay Cael “Pare, nga pala, kilala mo si Angie?”

“Uhh.. Oo. Bakit?” sabi ni Cael na parang walang gana. (Pero madalas ganoon siya magsalita…)

“Oo pero sa isang subject lang na minor. Nagulat ako, bigla akong kinausap. Tas tinanong kung kilala ko ba raw ikaw…” banggit ni Sid. Papalit-palit ang tingin ko sa dalawang lalaki na parang nanonood ng Ping-Pong o di kaya Tennis.

“Ahh… Oo nung high school ko sha nakilala,” sabi ni Cael. Napansin ko na parang umiba ang kanyang mukha ng matapos magkwento si Sid. Tinanong ko kay Cael kung sino yung Angie na iyon, at sabi niya friend raw niya tas higher batch raw. Ginusto ko pang mag-fishing ng iba pang impormasyon pero biglang narinig ko ang ringtone ko. May tumatawag pala nung oras na iyon.

Agad kong sinagot at, sa kabilang linya isang boses lalaki. Matagal na ng huli kong narinig ang boses na iyon.

“Kob! Musta?”

Sinabi niya sa’kin na ayus lang siya, pero sa tono ng kanyang boses, nahalata ko na hindi siya O-K. Agad kong tinanong kung anong problema niya pero nagulat ako na nasa school pala siya! Tinatanong niya sa’kin kung san raw kami pwedeng magkita dahil naghihingi ng advice sa’kin tungkol dun sa nililigawan niyang babae na nag-aaral din sa same school pero sa ibang building naman.

Nagulat ako at hindi mapalagay nung mga minu-minutong iyon habang kausap ko si Kob. Bihira lang tumawag itong lalaking ito at bihira lang din magsabi sa akin for advice! Puno ako ng pagtataka pero sinabi ko na lang din sa kanya na pupuntahan ko siya ngayon din.

Nag-sorry ulit ako kay Sid at nagpaalam. Mabuti naman at ok-ok na si Sid at masaya pa siyang kumaway. Nagpaalam din ako sa mga kasama ni Zen at, lastly, kay Cael.

“Sino yun? Boyfriend?” tanong ni Cael

“Hahaha ngek. Si Kob tumawag! Andito raw! Puntahan ko raw, naniniwala ka ba?” sabi ko na patawa’t nakangiti.

“Di ayus lang. Maglalaro pa ako e.” sabi ni Cael.

“Haha o sige. Basta kita-kits nalang mamaya, teks-teks na lang a! Sabihin mo sa kanila may mi-nit lang ako…” sabi ko habang inaayos ang aking lime green shoulder bag.

“Sige…” sabi ni Cael na parang walang gana nanaman. Ngunit sanay na ako sa tonong iyon.

Kumaway na ako kay Cael at kay Sid at sa iba at naglakad na ako ng mabilis para puntahan si Kob.

"Celton Park"

I didn't want to leave my discman behind. Even though my friends thought I was shutting them off from the world just bringing it, I felt like I was opening a whole new world by just walking around and listening to my favorite music tracks.

And I still could not forget that firefly I saw the night before.

That certain object rang a bell in my dilirious over-imposed cocoonic shell head as I was walking outside my little home cottage near the town under a autmn afternoon.

I was about to start my daily walk at Celton Park. My favorite stop.

I thought: Look at all the trees... The sun is fair and the sky is glee. It is autumn at the moment, and leaves start to fall." And then, I picked up this dried leaf and placed it in my right palm. I looked at it with wonder, examined all the shades of brown and orange, sulking all the beauty in the tender leaf. It was truly beautiful...

The wind was calm. It was a good thing I wore my worn out denim jacket. Though I wore skirt and boots, I believe it was not appropriate because it was starting to get cold. But then again, I do love a good fashion.

"Sigh* Where is that firefly?" I thought

I was starting to wonder if fireflies came in during the afternoon and not at night time. "Oh what am I thinking?"

"OH NO!" Suddenly I've bumped into this fine gentlemen. I was quite agitated, figuring out whether he was the one who bumped unto me first or the other way around. But then again, it didn't matter. He didn't seem to move from where he was. He...

He was in a state of stare... At my face!

"Is there something in my face, sir?" I had to ask..

Then he suddenly spoke "Oh no, there isn't any. I'm sorry I've must have spaced out for a while there..."

I looked at him in wonder and a bit of a confusing facial expression. But he, then, smiled at me nonetheless which made me more confused.

But in the physicality of his self, he looked quite dashing, really.

His hair was in a fix, blue-eyed, quite tall, wearing a coat. He appeared to be a businessman of some sort. But I wasn't quite sure...

"Are you all right, miss?"

Suddenly I was reminded to pull myself back together. "Yes, I... I am, sir... Forgive me for my blank stare..."

"Oh no, it's all right... I'm sorry, you are?"

He asked for my name! For a second, I could not believe that the situation I was in was suddenly happening! "Uhh..." I wasn't able to address my name clearly.

Then he said "Oh, it's okay. I might seem like some sort of a stranger to you. You should be careful next time, all right?"

I just looked at him, nodded my head and breathed. Fog came out of my mouth. It was really starting to get cold.

He turned his back and left. I felt like I had to call him out. I wanted to talk to that gentleman.

And then I wasn't able to contain myself any longer. I ran towards him and patted him in the left shoulder.

He smiled as he looked at me straight in the face. I told him what my name was and I told him that I was glad that I bumped into him. He smiled again. I always wonder why he smiled. I wanted to tell him that he should stop smiling coz it was blinding my eyes. But ofcourse I was just over-exaggerating.

"I'm Matthew. I'm from Jersey City. I'm currently helping out an old friend here to set up his own BookStore. This pleace is really nice.. Do you live here?"

He started to share all these nice things about him. I felt happy. My confidence boosted up like mad, but not quite. Just right. I told him that I lived in a small cottage a few blocks before Town and that I was studying in a University quite far from where I stayed.

He seemed really interested because he was listening to me like I had something special to say. It was a nice feeling.

And then he had to put the conversation into anabrupt end. "I'm sorry, it's getting late. I still have to meet my old pal. They are constructing the place for his Store. I'll see you again some time. I might be staying here for a couple of months or so!" He smiled again, his never ending antic that blinds my delicate eyes.

"See you, Jessie." he said.

I waved goodbye.

I sat in one of the benches and pressed the play button of my discman. The sounds of the guitar are beautiful and the singing was superb.

My day was authentic.

And I wonder what I will cook for supper?

This Girl in Some Room

I was in my room. All was dark and shady. My friends were also inside the room, sleeping. And as for me, I was lying down in my bed, staring at the darkness while the music in my discman played endlessly...

And then I saw something shining, sparkling, blinking...

That single light green speck flashing brightly in the dark oblivion I was gazing through... It was as if I were in space but with only a single star shinging so elegnatly... Light green in color, it blinked momentously, joyfully with glee. I felt awestruck and also frightened.

I felt I was alone. All was dark.

The music was still playing.

It was as if I were in a different place...

For a second I thought I wasn't in my world anymore.

Though it felt quite nice. It was like I found a spark of hope...

Through that single spark of light...

...

My firefly.

Subject Online Hook-Up

Wednesday night, 13th of May 2007. I finished work late coz I still had to encode some important files. Afterwards, I told myself I'd spend five to ten minutes checking my mail and my friend accounts.

"Oh boy, 24 messages? Ya gotta be kidding me..." I said. I was checking my Yahoo mail, quite exasperated coz I wanted to go home. I thought I couldn't view all the messages so I decided to just read only the interesting ones.

"Okay... Most of these mails are going to the trash!" I said while checking the bulk mails that were cluttering up my inbox. I was too fast in checking, I wasn't so sure anymore if I chose the right mail to erase. Then suddenly, I looked at the computer and saw that I had a Myspace mail alert telling me I had a message waiting on the Inbox. I tried to find out who sent it, and realized that it was from a stranger.

"Hmm... Might be some guy trying to get to know me better... Again." but I told that to myself with a, sort-of, common, boring mood. You see, at that time, I was already used to strangers emailing me and sharing their heart-filled wishes of "Hey you look great on that pic, can I know you better?". Though most guys who email me don't look that attractive so I just shut them off. Plus, I never trusted online jitters, considering the news I've been hearing about young girls getting kidnapped or raped. Totally gives me the creeps.

Anyway. I still opened that mail coz, somehow, I felt curious. I'm always curious!

"Hey, Mal, I'm gonna be off now. You know how to lock up right?" my secretary/friend, Sheryl, called out. I gave her a blank "Okay" coz my eyes were fixated on the computer monitor.

I was already on my Myspace inbox and to my utmost pry, the mail turned out to be the most unique one I've received. Here, I'm actually gonna place it here.

Subject: ...

Far away, circuits on... I see a face in the oblivion... It warms my body for a second. The unknown air of life, I breathe it...

So intimidating in a single stare... I'm obliged to exaggerate. It'd be hard to negotiate that lucky charm you got.

Nice... Is this just the scene? Neat... Must this be a scenario? I'd be the one flying in to you. For a second it may or not.

Dreams might grow. True enough… They're real after all.

Nice pic. and by the way, I made this one out of it... You seem very interesting....

I felt awe-struck. The poem was deep and it was totally awesome. I loved it! Though, I tried my very best not to get my hopes high even though I was SO drop dead head over heels toward the poem.

"Let us take a look what he looks like!" I said unpredictably clicking at his account. And then I saw it.

His name was Seth… And he wasn't so bad after all!

I looked at his picture really carefully and looked at his other pictures and it turned out that he was actually my type! He had lengthy hair, kind of wavy but short. His hair color was that of brunette brown. Sorry, I'm not quite good at men hairstyles. Then, he had a fair complexion. He had quite thick eyebrows, firm lips. He was thin but not skinny thin, just right thin. And, most especially, he had the most remarkable pair of green eyes, they were like these pair of luminous glow in the dark receptors! I was awed, totally. I crave for guys who have nice eyes especially the glaring ones I see on American TV shows. He actually had those pair of eyes like those on TV (unless he wore contacts, how stupid could he be if he ever did that..) I actually thought that he could actually be qualified for a Prime Time TV show!

"He's hot, but then, I just don't know him!" Though I was so excited and my heart began to pounce, I had to tell myself that this may not go too well. So I regarded my limits and maintained calm and not act all optimistic. So I thought of replying to him. Here I will place it.

Hi there, thanks for dropping me a message. I appreciated the poem so much and I might as well believe that the poem wasn't meant for 'my' picture image. Hehe. Uhhhhmm..... Anyway, thanks so much and yeah, hope to get to know you better. Till then! :) --Magdalynne

After sending the message, I shut the computer off and locked up. I was too anxious to eat dinner at my apartment.

“Sheesh, I’m hungry…”

I never imagined that I'd receive such an unexpected email with a poem. And, at that time, just thinking about the guy who sent it to me, I felt somewhat inferior, coz I felt ugly and had no match for him. I tried to forget about the whole Myspace incident though it just seemed endless. In the most peculiar way, it just kept on coming…

Friday, 15th of May 2007. It was lunch time. I was about to go down and grab a salad when I received, yet again, a mail from Seth. My heart leaped! I actually had Goosebumps all over my arms. But then again I tried to behave.

I read his reply and it here I will place it:

Hey,your welcome. I see you're from Philippines. I'm in Manila right now coz my mom has some work goin around here, so im here for a year or maybe more. So far this country's okay. Miss pennsylvania,though. My mom wants me to get a job here. still thinking about it. i dunno why i'm emailing you. i must be bored. like i said, you seem pretty interesting. wanna meet up? it's okay if you don't. thanks.

I felt somewhat bothered by his mail. I didn't know why.

"Why is he sharing all these stuff to me? And he wants to meet me??" I thought. I was, again, backtracking on the disadvantages of getting involved with men on the net. I felt bothered. But somehow, I felt excited at the same time. I had so many thoughts whirling around my head back then.

And so I ended up replying to his email, anyway. And here it was:

Oh really? I'm living in Manila. I am currently working at a furniture business (pretty boring huh) but it's just a part time thing. I'll be on a filming firm soon (hopefully..) meeting up? hmm wow that's fast. i'm not quite comfortable with that approach. i'm sorry. you seem like a nice person, but I have to think about it. Thanks again for the poem. I thought it was deeply moving. :) -- Magdalynne

When I clicked the "sent" button, I actually realized how stupid I was to click it at a deliberate instant. I wanted to say more or maybe change some ill-mannered words. I just hoped he replied coz I thought I said some not too synthesizing statements.

“I think I was too rude... OH, DOESN'T MATTER! I had to tell those things to him. Ugh… I’m confused…”

While I was eating lunch with my friends, I told them about my email encounter with a cute stranger, Seth.

I actually printed one of his nicer pics and showed it to my friends. Well, obviously and by design, they shrieked in excitement. "OH MY GOD YOU'RE SO LUCKY!! Can I date him instead?" said Megan. Annie was also excited. But of course they didn't disregard the precautionary measures of Online Mates.

They told me that it was a cool thing and I had to meet him while they tagged along with me. Or if I didn't want any company, they'll just act as spies and look at us from a distance and contact me on my phone if they see or feel anything suspicious. They said it would be much safer that way.

I told them that I’d be okay if I made it on my own, but thanked them for their hospitality. I felt happy that they were such caring ‘officemate-slash-friends’ even though I met them for less than two weeks or so. Megan and Annie are the best.

Right after lunch, I went back to my typing spree. It was back to work when I found out that Seth replied. I could sense that he didn't have anything to do at home. Anyway, I clicked the "Home" button and saw that I had 1 new mail. My very untamed heart started jumping up and down, totally felt ecstatic and scared. Here was Seth's reply:

hahaha.i see youre freaked out by online hooligans. its okay.. i read your profile and found out that i live near the building as to where you work (creepy huh?don't worry im no stalker). i had to ask my mom where your building was and she told me all. theres a starbucks cafe patio right upfront the building rigth? if you're still interested, we can meet there. i'm still in on getting to know your presonality.haha thanks.

I felt like I wanted to scream and be frightened at the same time.

"Why is he saying all these??" I showed my friends the email, and they were like, all happy for me instead. When I showed them more pics of him, they just kept on shaking my back like a bean bag. They made me feel dizzy all right. Yes I already get the point, my friends: You want me to do this date!

"Oh he's cute, though I don't like the grunge look." said Annie. She was a preppy girl so she wasn't that used to guys who were not that 'clean'. I could tell that Seth was kind of like a simple yet deep-seated fellow coz he just wore a shirt and jeans and like 'not-a-care-in-the-world' type of fashion statement. But then it actually looked kind of 'dashing' and 'mystical'. I tried my very best to get back to work, but my hands were itching to reply.

And yes I gave in to the itch. I had to reply. Here was what I had to say:

Okay. I will meet you then. But I hope you're not a mean person who does stupid stuff. I'm sorry I can be delusional sometimes. Ugh. But okay I'll meet you. Tomorrow? This weeK? thanks. --Magdalynne P.S. still love the poem. :)

I had to let some of my emotions soar through my reply. And good thing it turned out well. We set the date. He suggested May 21, Thursday. I told him we'd meet up in the afternoon coz my work would end up until 12. I felt so excited and scared at the same. But more excited nonetheless. I was about to meet an extraordinary American waste too sweet to comprehend. In my eerie perception of feeling, I felt so good.

It was Thursday, May 21 2007. Before I went to the office, I brought my make up kit so that at least I wouldn't look like a sweating mandrill after work. I fixed my hair as best as I could and brought jeans and a shirt so I could change afterwards.

Minutes, hours passed and, for all I knew, it was almost 12. I left work at around 11:30 so that I could prep up myself for my date. I felt so nervous. It reminded me so much of my soiree days during high school.

“This is much freakier than soiree…”

 After fixing myself, I sent Seth an Sms message. Oh yes, he had a phone with him so it was better for me to reach him. He gave me his number along with the dating details on his last message. I asked him where he was and he told me he was already there. So I felt more panicky.

My hands were all shaky. I kept combing my hair with the use of my fingers. My friends saw me in a paranoid state so they rushed instantaneously like sports athletes aiming to calm my whole system.

"C'mon relax or you might screw up!" said Katty in a jokingly manner. I asked them to wish me good luck and I went down the elevator on my way to the Starbucks cafe in front of Tower Abres Building where I was working.

Not long enough I reached the patio of the Cafe.

I was looking hard for him. I couldn’t see where he was when a voice beckoned from behind. Someone called out my name!

"Magdalynne.."

I actually froze.

I looked at my back to see who it was.

And to my amazement, it WAS none other than Seth.

He was actually there and I could not believe it.

He was standing and he was smiling! He was wearing a gray shirt, kind of faded, and some khaki shorts and sneakers. I thought his grunge wardrobe looked self-confidently attractive.

"You're Magdalynne right?" he asked.  Goosebumps grew out off my arms.

"Yeah I am! You're Seth right?" I realized I asked the dumbest question. I felt so nervous, that was why. But he just laughed and shook my hand.

"Yup, that guy's me!" I noticed he had soft hands and I was rapt by it.

He was so adorable. I never predicted that, when we’d talk, I'd actually have a very comforting, interesting and cheery conversation with Seth! Before the date, I had a scenario in my head: I screwing up, and he'll just get pissed and get disappointed at my behavior. But NO he was SO open-minded and was so charming. And when it was my turn to talk, he’d just listen as if he was really interested in what I had to say. I felt like I knew him already for a lot of years when we talk. We were both comfortable with each other and we had a normal but out of the ordinary day.

Though at the back of my head, I was keeping my mind open and wasn't letting any expectation ruin my friendly relationship with Seth. I was thinking that maybe we could hook up but I was also thinking not to expect coz it happened to me before when I was way back in college. When I was talking to Seth, the first thing I told myself was that "He's just being friendly, and that's all. He's talking to me for company not for 'beyond friendship matters'." It was a nice experience. We talked for hours. We ate dinner together at a pizza place and then he wanted to check out the apartment where I was living. We were on our way.

"You're so straight forward..." I said to him.

He grinned "What?"

"Well, American guys say to girls that they like her right then and there. Most guys here seldom do that. There was a time when I was in college, I noticed that guys here are not that frank when it comes to what they feel about girls. Then I realized that guys were just not too vocal about it. Though I just tried my best to understand them and accepted it." I explained to him. Seth was such a good listener. Whenever I had to say something, he'd just be quite and listen to me. I thought that what he said on the mail was true. He WAS really interested in getting to know me.

"That sucks. Philippine guys.." he said laughing. I punched him lightly in the arm, I didn’t know why. He asked me if Philippine women love to punch guys in the arm and I told him most women all over the world do that. We laughed.

"Why, you tell me I’m straight forward?" asked Seth.

"Well, yeah. In fact, you're fine! I kinda like it. I guess I'm just not used to the fact that guys are straight forward. For years, I've been dealing with guys who had so much difficulty in expressing how they felt. They won't say a word! Until I realized that they just weren't interested. Until I realized that I end up getting all confused..." I felt down that moment and stupid at the same time. I felt like I got all emotional, thus, ending up blabbering away.

But Seth grinned like he used to do.

We were still walking. Hands in his pockets, he was kicking the pebbles that got in his way. Then he went quite closer beside me. I forgot to tell you that he has this amazing manly scent. I couldn't figure out what perfume he was using. I wanted to ask him at that time but I was too shy.

"Thanks for the company. I really appreciate it!" said Seth looking at me with a charming smile. I smiled too and looked away coz I felt kind of sad afterwards. I was then thinking: 'I knew it, it was just for company. Yeah I was expecting that..'

But then he said "We should do this more often. I dunno..."

I felt puzzled. He said he wanted to do the thing we were doing more often? But then I just listened to what he was going to say to me.

"When I first saw your image on Myspace, I really liked you at that time and I had the urge to get to know you. You seem pretty interesting. I guess I was too tired of blondes and brunettes or tired of seeing the same people. Not sure..." said Seth doing his very best to explain what he felt.

"I dunno what to say..." I said kind of having a worried look. I was hoping that I didn't say any not-so-nice words.

He sat on the bench. We arrived at the park. It was not far from my place. He sat down and I sat on his left side beside him, though a few inches of distance. I was feeling shy.

"By the way, Seth, I really really love the poem you gave me. I'm not kidding!" I said really convincing him that I was sincere. He laughed and said some jokes. For the past time that we talked, he would also joke around. And good thing I got his jokes. I'm quite of a slow person, not being able to get the jokes right away. But I dunno at that time I was laughing at his comic humor. Maybe I was too attracted to the guy, but nevertheless, I find his jokes funny.

"Well thanks. I'm happy you liked it." he said nodding his head appearing all gentlemanly. I slapped him lightly on his shoulders and cried a slight 'Ouch!'. He was insisting that I slapped his shoulder a little bit harder, but I refused to believe coz I knew it was just a mere tap. But then again he just loved the whole joke concept.

Then he told me that he'll make me more poems and I just waggled my head and said 'Thank you.'

Then we talked about music once more and we also talked about his band. He shared to me that he had a band in Pennsylvania. He was the bassist. But since he was here in Manila, his brother was taking his place. Though the nice thing was that he was still content coz even though he was with them at that moment, he was happy that the band was still intact. He would also send some poems to them and lately received a mail that they were coming up with some songs and hopefully they'll let Seth hear it.

"I sent the poem I made you. Hope they put some melody in it..." he said

"Oh... That would be pretty awesome..." I said right away, with my eyes wide and twitching my eyebrows up and down.

"I don't even know why I made a poem or lyric out of your image. Haha!" said Seth grinning. He looked at me and smiled. I kind of blushed and looked away so as to hide the embarrassment. "But then again I was just interested in ya!" he said

I noticed that he wanted to hold my hand, but he was hesitating not to, so he forgot all about that plan and said "Gee I feel like a Filipino guy.."

I felt puzzled for a split second then I grinned "No... You're starting to become a dear friend of mine! Thank you Seth. Thank you! Thank you!" I said while shaking his shoulder back and forth. He was laughing and saying 'You're welcome' in a shaky tone as well.

He then stood up coz he told me he had to go home soon. He dropped me off my place and he shook my hand. "I really enjoyed your company." he said yet again.

"Haha! You've been saying that for ten gazillion times! But, uhm. Welcome. And I DO want to do this more often! Really!" I said straight away.

He smiled "Me too. Me too."

We said our farewells. He told me that he wanted to hang out more often and I should bring my friends next time. And also he'd introduce me to his friends too. And also (he seemed to have a lot of requests but I just nodded my head and smiled..) he wanted to hang out in my house so that he could quote/unquote 'sabotage' the place. I just laughed coz I was too tired to slap him in the arm. And then right afterwards, I went inside my cozy apartment and went to my room to change.

While I was changing, I couldn't help but think how lucky I was to get an email from Seth. I mean, I thought that there were A LOT of women who were prettier and charming than me. But then he was interested in me. I thought that, in the future, time will soon pass and then he'll grow tired of me. But then I also thought that nothing lasts forever and that I should just be happy and live the present moment without anxieties and expectations.

After changing in to my pajamas, I got an SMS message. It was from Seth. I thought he was gonna say "I enjoyed your company" or anything of the sort, but he said instead:

 Magdalynne! Thank you for the company. And I hope we see each other soon. Take care then! Seth

I felt so relieved, especially the "Take Care" part. Even though I knew nothing lasts forever and perfection in life is impossible, I just focused on what I was feeling at the moment. He said 'Take Care' and that's all I needed.

When I went to bed, I still looked at my phone until I fell asleep still thinking about the wonderful day I had. Questions lingered in my head. It bothered me, yes. But I just thought of positive things.

Seth was my friend. He needed company, and I responded by giving him what he wanted. Yes I felt something. Though I’m not expecting. I’m just there…

And I think, for me, it feels absolutely great: Be there for that someone and forgetting yourself. It’s fun! And since then, I reaped the best of benefits.

Life is so ironic. Who would have imagined that letting go could turn into a blessing in disguise?

“ Less Ordinary! ”

CHAPTER II

Jiro was busy painting another one of his so-called “Masterpiece”. He decided to make his own version of Da Vinci’s Mona Lisa. He was still trying to figure out how he’d be able to manage it.

Suddenly, the door opened. “Oi, Jiro-san. Obuki-sensei wishes to congratulate you for winning the 1^st prize at the last competition! A job well done, man!” said Akio, one of Jiro’s classmates.

“Yeah, yeah…” said Jiro sluggishly. Akio closed the door.

Didn’t they read the sign outside the classroom? ‘Don’t Disturb’? thought Jiro. He didn’t want any visitors or distractions once he started on a painting. He enjoys the pleasure of being alone and once he gets pissed, he really flames like a bull.

It took him four or so hours to finish half of the painting he was making. It was six in the evening and he decided to call it a day. He packed his things and placed it in his bag. He went out of the classroom and locked it. He then went to the office to give the key back to the officers in charge. Then, he went out of the school building to head home.

“Konbanwa Matsumoto Jiro!” said a voice from afar.

Oh no, another one of those obnoxious women thought Jiro. He was too eager to get home and he didn’t want to talk and prolong the time. His only desire was to reach his home early and eat and then sleep.

“Yeah what is it?” said Jiro trying to be patient. Though his eyes looked sleepy and apathetic.

“I hope I’m not irritating you in any way.” Said a perky young high school look-a-like girl with pigtails and pink ribbons. “…But anyway I’d just like to say… Well… The moment I saw you…”

“Uhh, are you trying to tell me that you either like me or you had a crush on me or you want me to be your boyfriend? Coz if it’s related to the things I’ve mentioned, well I’d have to think about that. Right now I wanna go home and eat some bento, have miso soup and sleep early.” Said Jiro right away. The perky girl eyed at Jiro, shocked at his response.

“Wow, I wasn’t even finished. Boy, you can be so rude…” said the girl. “You’re cute and so irresistible, but you’re SO SO SO SO…”

“Yeah I’ve heard that a couple of times and I like it. Okay? So I’ll just talk to you tomorrow coz right now I want to go home. Okay? Do you get it?” said Jiro starting to turn his back and walk home

“You always say we’d talk tomorrow but you always ignore me like some paper you can crumple any time. All you have to say is whether you’re interested in me or not!” said the girl, demanding his attention. Somehow her perkiness slowly vanished and became like a child desperate for a lollipop.

Jiro turned around and didn’t face the girl. “I’m not interested in anything…”

“So you’re not interested in me?” asked the girl.

There was a long pause…

Then, Jiro sighed. “Yeah I guess so…”

The girl frowned and then suddenly, she cried. She ran as fast as she could. Jiro, on the other hand, continued on walking. He could still here the girl’s innocent cry.

Then he thought while he started to walk Another broken-hearted victim thanks to me…Bunch of dumb-ass…

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

It took him fifteen or so minutes before he could reach home. And then he arrived at an old, small house with a small steel gate. It was covered with vines and the whole lot appeared to be somewhat haunted and enchanting at the same time. The house was his grandmother’s. After her death, his parents decided that Jiro should stay in the house. His parents, also, wanted to rent the rooms, but Jiro refused because he always hated the nuisance and just adored being alone.

He opened the light and swung his jacket towards the sofa. The house was filled with newspapers and rice boxes that were a more or less a week old. He never bothered to clean the mess up due to laziness. He went to his room, took off his clothes and headed towards the bathroom to take a quick shower.

After fourty-five or so minutes, he finally got out of the bathroom. He changed in to some drier clothes and made his way towards the small living room to watch television. As he sat down, he heard a crackling noise. He looked at the portion where he sat and he noticed an unopened bag of chips. Right away, he got it, opened it and started eating it while watching.

“Darn, I forgot to by dinner in the store…” said Jiro while slothfully eating the chips and watching the TV like a modern aged zombie.

He watched tirelessly for two hours straight. Upon the brink of sleepiness, he closed the TV and went to his room to get some peaceful sleep.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

                “MATSUMOTO JIRO WA DOKO DA???” yelled Yaguchi-sensei.

It was eight in the morning at Sorakima University. Yaguchi-sensei grew impatient upon seeing the unfinished painting inside the classroom where Jiro was working.

“Sigh* He told me he’d be finished by today, and here I am standing in front of his unfinished work! Now how the heck are we going to submit this piece to the Akizawa Museum, eh?” said Yaguchi-sensei wiping the perspiration from his forehead with the use of his hanky.

“Sensei, he’ll be here in no time. You see, he did his best to finish it, but, well, I am confident, sir, that we’d be able to submit this work of art by today!” said Chou.

Yamada Chou is a classmate of Jiro and is one of his trusted friends. He’s one of the ‘nerds’ in class for being a straight ‘A’ student. Yet even though he’s smart, he’s got outwardly enticing looks that make girls go gaga over him.

“Sigh* I guess I just got carried away. I do hope he would be able to finish the piece. It would be a nice parting gift to consider this University as the best Art University. Plus, also, the cash itself can be a nice thing to have as well!” said Yaguchi-sensei. “We need more facilities! We need more buildings for more courses! We need funds! Oh it would be a joy to win the 1^st prize, again!” Said the healthy-looking professor. He was starting to imagine all the possibilities of winning the grand prize in the Painting Contest sponsored by the Akizawa Museum. Chou grinned.

“I’ll be right back, sensei. I’ll just make a quick phone call.” Said Chou. Yaguchi-sensei nodded and Chou went out of the room.

Chou got his small colored phone and searched for Jiro’s number. Then he pressed the ‘Call’ button right away and waited for an answer.

“H-Hello?” said a sleepy voice on the other side of the line

“Jiro! Chou here. What the heck? Man, don’t tell me you’re still sleeping. You gotta finish the painting now. Sensei’s going nuts right now. He’s counting on you, you know…” said Chou half whispering while fixing his glasses properly.

“Oh yeah, right. I’ll be on my way. Tell him to wait for, like, three hours coz I still have a lot of cleaning to do…”

“Aw c’mon Jiro! You can fix that later! You gotta get here right away!” said Chou almost shouting but still trying his very best to stay calm and speak in a whisper

“All right! All right! I was just kidding. Hehe… Be there in fifteen minutes.” Said Jiro half asleep and he hang up.

“Darn, he’d better be here in fifteen minutes…” said Chou to himself. He placed his phone right back in his left pocket and as soon as he was about to go back inside, someone called him from afar.

“Chou!” said the same perky girl Jiro encountered the night before. Her name was Naoko and she paid close attention to Jiro ever since the first day of classes.

“Naoko-san.” Said Chou with a smile.

“How rude can he get???” said Naoko, slightly fuming with anger. Her fists were hardening and she was stomping her feet like a little girl.

“Nani?” asked Chou

“Jiro-san! I dunno what to do with him! I’m crazy in love with him but he’s shutting me off!” said Naoko. She was hoping that Chou would give a good explanation as to why Jiro was doing those things to her. Chou scratched his head.

“Well you see, I have no business telling people what to do. I’ve got other things to settle, so I suggest…” said Chou. He wanted to let Naoko know that he was ending a statement and he didn’t want to talk about it anymore.

“Please. I know that Jiro’s a friend of yours. Just tell me what I need to know…” said Naoko almost begging.