| time well spentWhen I haven't posted for over a year, you know it has to be something important that gets me to write something; that's how important this is :)
Happy one year darling.
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| so since it's been over three months since i last posted, i figure it
might be time to start showing people where on earth i've been:
i've been in red telephone boxes
i've been near big clocks
i've been close to too many flowers for my own good
i've been in cool markets
i've stood in the theatre of dreams
and i've seen amazing churches (sideways of course) the point is, of course, i haven't been here. |
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| immanuel on immanuel:
Immanuel Tan (pronounced Tahn) is quite obnoxious
in a Dave Chappelle type of way. Sometimes his unskilled guitar playing during
meetings contributes only to the Backstreet Boys mantra of our company, hence
our high priority on pretty-boy-ness. We
like our members to dress in pink collared shirts, a trend started by Mr. Tan
himself. Not only is the shirt pink and collared, it is also checkered, perfect
to draw simple economical graphs on. We
prize multiuse attire because of the usefulness of Mr. Tan’s dress shirts, and
have now implemented a uniform of pink checkered shirts and pinstripe pants
with ruler increments on them to aid measurement. His mind is also filled with very
useful facts about pop-culture and the like (i.e. Ludacris lyrics and the latest gossip on Yao Ming). He prides himself on his
extensive Wellesley
facebook contingent, as well as his ability to turn soy sauce cap red.
Mr. Tan is also very skilled in percussion: the songs he creates
on his laptop may sound at first like random pounding on the keys, but
after a
few seconds, you realize the intricacies of the pounding. He is able to both write up reports on the
marketing and economics of Backstreet Boys merchandise while exhibiting musical
creativity. His musical abilities extend
beyond the normal; his DJing skills are displayed on his weekly radio show
“Scratchy Speakers” which ironically includes NO scratching, but does include
scratching up your speakers and a lot of dead air time. When he sings it just
looks awkward because the frequency of his voice is so low that people hear
nothing coming out of his mouth but just see him moving of his mouth.
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| sorry, i just think this is hilarious. mostly because i know a lot of smokers, and not because i think 75 year old ladies being stuck in bathtubs is hilarious.
"After she was lifted to safety and donned a warm robe, Fromal didn’t ask for food. She wanted one of her Parliament 100s and a Coke."
click here |
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| a few lessons i learned from watching lone wolf mcquade on the bus:
- nothing
beats texas justice
- the
best way to pick up hot european chicks is to let child/loved one be in
harm's way due to angry animal
- that
being said, any such fling will inevitably end in hot european chick dying
- never
use karate when a hand grenade will do
- computer
hacking in the 80's was done with only one finger
- american
muscle always beats euro flash (which explains why every movie chase with
a firebird/camaro going up against a maserati ends the same way)
- when a
white man, a black man, and a latino work together, anything is possible.
- last
but not least, a real texas man never lets anything get in the way of
being a hero
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