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| doin it welli feel as though i need to be single, theres just times that i dont know if i should be doing what i love, being with someone i love. the person says this but they do another. They say they love you but to their friends its nothing, you feel as though you dont exist to them, and they dont notice that either. i know they make fun of you behind your back and everything..maybe its just me. ive noticed taht i tend to push away people that i love, thinking i might just get hurt. aHH more of this later, to aggrivated to type | | |
| I dont feel like i could go out into the world. This might seem like im over reacting, but its been said by one person that i care about. maybe thats why people stare at me because im ugly, i know that now. god, this totally makes me think twice about myself now. This is going to make me so paranoid more than ever. | | |
| controlso J was supposed to call me back but its been like five hours already, and still no sign of any calls. The past few days, i ve been feeling as though J is doing something behind my back again. Though J says i love you and everything, i just dont feel that its genuine. at times i feel so stupid, i feel like so underappreciated. I really do feel like there is someone else..i cant help but feel that way. i need to learn to control my emotions..god i just hate feeling like this everytime...everytime!! | | |
| crackerwow, its been almost 4 months since the last time i posted on here. i am coming back because that period of time that i havent been on here had many shit and other things that went on, and i just need some place to vent out things, and i dont write in my poem book no more, so i guess this is a good place to do so too. all my life, i was surrounded by people who cheated or was cheated on in a relationship, and i told myself that i would never let myself be one of that, yet it did happen to me, someone that i truly beleive i could spend my life with (i know im still young, but i think im ready), the one i truly gave my trust and my heart to once again, the same heart that i have kept in a box for such a long time, the same heart that i kept telling to stop beating, the same heart that was stepped on, pushed around and was totally ignored, but yet i gave this love thing a try again. But to my dissapointment, i was cheated on, and i still cant beleive it happened to me, it was the most hurtful thing to me...mentally, emotionally and i could say physically. But we are trying to work things out for the better i guess. | | |
| TORNinBETWEENtheTWOTORN IN BETWEEN THE TWO
' c a u s e i r e a l l y w a n t t o b e w i t h y o u
But something is telling me I should leave
L E A V E Y O U A L O N E
what.hurts.the.most.is.when.we.started.out
It was cool, it was everything that love's about
BUT s o m e t h i n g HAPPENED
' c a u s e I ’ m f e e l i n g s o b u r n e d o u t
' C a u s e I c a n ' t u n d e r s t a n d y o u n o w
A PART OF ME WANTS TO LEAVE
But a part of me wants to be here with you
And everytime I think that it's over and done
YOU MAKE ME FALL BACK IN LOVE
Y O U G O T M E J U S T T O R N  ♥
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