ghettoderric's Xanga

Saturday, April 01, 2006

Sat, 01 Apr 2006 21:54:19 GMT

Untitled

I'm bored. I'm hanging out in Buskirk computer lab with Tiffany. We aren't talking though. We are both doing our own thing on the computer. I started this week thinking all week that I got paid on Friday (yesterday.) When Friday finally rolled around, I asked my manager if she got a chance to see how much my check was for..she informed me that we get paid every two weeks. That sucked! There isn't much worse than expecting pay, only to find out you don't get it yet. I have so many things that I need money for. I need to pay my mom back immensly. I also need clothes and shoes. Angie and I are going to see Kathy Griffin in Columbus on the 27th of April, so I'll need the money for those tickets etc.

You know what is REALLY annoying? When you send someone a message on myspace and they ignore you. Hello people..there is a sent folder. I KNOW when you have read my messages and are just choosing not to answer me. Yes, everyone has a time when they are busy and can't reply..and there are even days when we just don't feel like it. But come on...not all the time. That's just being a bitch.

I hope I meet someone great soon. Don't get me wrong, I'm not someone who is MISERABLE being single..however, I do want a boyfriend so bad that I can taste it. I don't think it's too much to ask. I'm nice, I'm attractive, I'm funny, I'm intelligent, I'm sensitive...why can't I find the same? Oh well. It will happen eventually.

I am soooo glad that I am off of work tomorrow. It will be wonderful to get to relax at home and just chill out and watch movies all day. I love those days. That used to be my life..thank God I have a life now and I'm working and contributing to the world. Haha. I am laughing, but I'm serious at the same time. I was bored out of my mind before. Working now lets me truly appreciate it when I have a day off. Well..that's all for now.

Tuesday, March 28, 2006

Tue, 28 Mar 2006 11:04:05 GMT

I'm back! Yes, the people that have been obsessively checking for a month to see if I have posted a blog finally get their wish. I'm making one. So, enjoy.

I'm finally at a place where I am happy. I am working at Opinions Ltd. again. I'm loving it. I was stupid for leaving the first time. I'm so glad that Angie took me back. I've been there about two weeks. Yeah, you get yelled at all day by people who see that clipboard in your hand and turn into hateful bitches but the pay and people I work with are worth it. I love all of them. Angie is especially awesome because she too has OCD and we share a lot of the same symptoms.

I'm sitting at Drinko library bored on the internet. Surprise surprise.

I'm waiting on 2 oclock to roll around because Brandon and I are going to the mall. I may go a bit earlier though..because I'm bored. O.k..enough for now.

Friday, February 10, 2006

Fri, 10 Feb 2006 11:26:16 GMT

Guess what? I got a job at Ruby Tuesday at the Mall of America! I am so excited. I can't believe how quickly I got a job here. It amazes me. I hope I like this job. I'm sure that I will. I will be hosting and getting $8.50 an hour. It is part time so I will have to be looking for another part time job. Wish me luck.

Tuesday, February 07, 2006

Tue, 07 Feb 2006 08:24:24 GMT

I am in Minnesota! I got here Sunday afternoon. The drive was very long. I am LOVING it. Kim has been an excellent tour guide and is showing me places of interest and generally explaining the area. We drove through the uptown area and headed to the Mall of America. That place is awesome. It is so HUGE that it's unbelievable. I get the feeling that even if you have lived here forever and went to the mall every day it would still be confusing as to which stores are where. I can sometimes remember which floor a certain store is on but after that, I have no idea. I have decided that each floor is probably the size of a whole regular mall. I am so thrilled that I'm finally living in a place with an H&M. I love that store! Kim bought me the cutest shirt there for my birthday. Yesterday I got applications like crazy. I'm bound to find a job soon. Please send me good energy with this! On Sunday night we headed to The Gay 90s. It's one of the main gay clubs here. It was so much fun. It has 3 dance floors and 7 bars. Again, big. Haha. Then we walked a few blocks down to another one called The Saloon. I am really enjoying it here and can't wait to see more.

Sunday, January 29, 2006

Sun, 29 Jan 2006 11:46:01 GMT

I absolutely cannot wait. I am moving to Minneapolis, Minnesota. I am thrilled. My best friend Kim so generously invited me to come and stay with her. In return for rent, I will be cleaning house etc. until I can find a job and save up enough money to afford rent. I will only be like 10 minutes from the Mall of America, I will be in one of the largest gay populations in the US, there will be many things to do, there will be lots of job opportunities, AND I will be there with my best friend! We are constantly saying how much we have in common. It's so true. It is so hard to explain to anyone else HOW much we have in common. We never cease to be amazed when we find out something new. That is so great with our friendship because we can support each other when no one else can, because we actually know what is going on with the other. We also crack each other up. Deb! That's all I have to say regarding that. I can't wait to live there with her. I can't wait for her to show me all of the places where she grew up, and places that are of significance. No one else but us will get this but, we will finally be free from the guilt that certain people knowingly or unknowingly place on us. With us being there together in person, we won't allow the other one to feel that way. Kim, are you ready to go see those dancing shower boys? Haha! I am! I think "We are going to make it after all!"

Sunday, January 22, 2006

Sun, 22 Jan 2006 09:06:17 GMT

What to say? I haven't been on here forever. Um..how is everyone? I've been o.k. I have decided to withdraw from Marshall and start back up in the Fall (or whenever I feel like it again. ) It would be a stupid mistake for me to continue attending this semester because my heart isn't in it. And everyone who knows me will know that if my heart isn't in it..I won't do it! Therefore..I will fail. I can't do that to myself, or to my mom since she's put so much money in it. So, I'm just going to go back when I'm feeling it again. I still have absolutely no idea what my major will be. One part of me says "Duh! Theatre!" because one of my biggest passions is acting..particularly soap opera acting and I feel that it would improve an acting resume to have that listed. However another part of me says, "No, you won't make money with that. Choose a major that you are guaranteed success with and do acting on the side and if you are successful then great and if not, then you have something else to fall back on." It bugs me because nothing really interests me other than acting..and if it does it's something that takes forever and is too difficult and I probably wouldn't stick around school long enough to do it.

Wednesday, December 14, 2005

Wed, 14 Dec 2005 09:05:29 GMT

Guess what? I can't sit still! Even though I just got a free trial of the internet back, I can't sit still. I've listened to everything from Trina to currently playing the To Wong Foo soundtrack. Right now I'm listening to Crystal Waters.

I am ECSTATIC to be out of the dorms! It really feels wonderful. I don't regret doing it. I am glad I did it because not only did I make some new aquaintances, but also just for the exerience. I won't ever have to wonder "Should I have done that?" All in all, it just wasn't for me. It definitely had it's pros and cons but I think I kept finding more cons. Student Security. Need I say more? I don't know where they find these people but they are absolutely vile.

Hmm...what else should I say on the dreaded third paragraph on my xanga. I say dreaded because I have a fear of certain odd numbers because of m OCD. It's always a hard decision what I can and can't say on this paragraph.

I am really excited about this break from school. It will hopefully be awesome.

Btw, if you want to talk to me my aim is theantidiva44

Thursday, December 08, 2005

Thu, 08 Dec 2005 09:47:26 GMT

I LOVE the fact that certain people from Yahoo groups CONTINUE to catch up on my friendship with Kim and read my blogs. That is truely pathetic. How completely obsessed with us can you be? For those of you who don't understand this post, it's obviously not referring to you. It's for the people that never cease to amaze me because they have to keep tabs on "The Kim and Derric Show." They get some kind of kick out of being voyeurs into our lives.

Tuesday, December 06, 2005

Tue, 06 Dec 2005 13:26:43 GMT

I had a breakdown today. I was completing my student loan entrance exam. It said that 6 months after I withdrawl from school that I have to start paying back my loan. I freaked out and went to see them. They told me the same thing. My original plan was to take part time classes next semester and work the rest of the time to save money to move to LA. I found out in order to receive any loan from them I have to go to school at least half time. That would not leave enough time to work to save money. I called my mom. That was a big mistake. I love my mom more than anything and she can really use guilt and emotional manipulation on me whether she realizes that she is doing it or not. She kept saying that I didn't have time to save money to move by Fall. She kept telling me that I needed to go to Marshall for four more years. I understand she doesn't want me to be far away. That drives me crazy too. I hate the thought of being away from her. However, it's not like we are out of each other's lives. I am just taking a step to improve my life. She will still be a very important part of it regardless if we live close together or not. I also understand that she wants me to continue going to school. She doesn't want me to end up like my dad with no college and a sucky job. I get it. I don't want that to happen either. Just because I am not going to be attending Marshall does not mean that I will not go to school in CA. I wanted to go to school there after I've been there for a least a year so I am considered a resident. That way I don't have to pay out of state tuition. Anyway, I had a break down on the phone with her. It turned into "You have no idea what it's like for me here." "I hate West Virginia." "Everyone talks about me because I'm gay." She told me it's not going to be much different anywhere else. I made sure to tell her YES it is. I mean please, West Hollywood, CA vs. Huntington, WV..hmm...I wonder which one is more gay-friendly? You decide. I think she does realize it's drastically different, she just doesn't want me to go. I hate leaving my family and friends here too but I MUST do this to make my life better. I want to act. I want to live by the beach. I want to be with diversity. I want to be in a CITY. Sure, it's going to be difficult but if I really want it then I can make it work. I also realize that it could be a mistake. I hope it's not, but it could. If that were the case then I would just come crawling back. I really hope I can mentally prepare myself for the guilt trips I will be taking and just brush them off my shoulder. I have never EVER felt like I belong here. Not that there is anything wrong with West Virginia. If this is the place that makes someone happy then by all means BE here. CA won't make everyone happy,but hopefully it will make me as happy as I believe that it will. If you pray, please pray that this works out for me. If you don't, then please just send some good thoughts my way. I would really appreciate it. Thank you.

*UPDATE* I have decided to stay at Marshall until I have graduated. Then, I am going to move. It makes me angry because I want to move now, but I know I need to graduate first. It just makes me mad because why couldn't I have been born in a huge city? Why did I have to be in West Virginia?

Saturday, December 03, 2005

Sat, 03 Dec 2005 21:46:32 GMT

I've decided that my next stop needs to be Adecco and Kelly Services. I need a job really bad. No more of this restaurant, retail stuff. I want to be a temp for a secretary somewhere. I may not be the most skilled at office equipment but I can learn. They would be stupid NOT to hire me because I type faster than almost anyone I know. I know after they saw the speed at which I type they would hopefully want to hire me.

By the way, Kim and I are moving to Los Angeles! We have said time and time again that we are. We mean it. We really are! We don't know when, I have to find a job and hold it and beat the anxiety and save lots of money. I have to do it though. If I want to be on a soap, I have to move to the soaps.

I really hope I hear something back from The Real World people. How awesome it would be to not have to go to school next semester because I got to go do the RW. Everyone send good thoughts my way with this please. I want it so much! (Even if I AM the person who fights with the rest of the people in the house.) Haha.