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| another year of updatesso another year has passed by...what can i say?
let's just say it's more than what i expected or wanted to be...just feels like celebrating life itself...as u think of it, how long will u live on earth? these days, you may never know..in a blink of an eye, u can just disappear...u must cherish all of the times you've shared w/ family and friends and cherish wat you learned from all the years whether is bad or good...regardless of your mistakes, there's always a reason why you made that mistake...u should always have a positive attitude towards life and anything that passes your path...yea i've cried many tears, i've been angry, i've been happy at the smallest things and big things, i've been scared all of my life, and more...but at the end i realize all of these emotions I've experience is just part of life...God made my life so interesting...surprises comes to me left to right but i love it....
the biggest thing in my life this past year is that some of the Truth comes out...from my :boyfriend, my family, amd just w/ friends...Love just surrounds me and all, well that's what i think..hehehee:)
i love laughing and smiling and just be a kid sometimes...i may be the weirdest person around but hey, i am proud to be me...not to be too cocky, but hey i've gained mad pounds and short and just not the typical lady all people loves but I am contented...acceptance is in, and denial is out...i may make sense here or not..hahahaa....but i'm one weird ladieee.....so do u know me now....???it's just for u to find out....see ya whenever, whatever
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| running out of reasonsyou can try to be perfect but are you?
you can say so many excuses into not wanting to do something or try to get out of a problem, but how many can you think of?
you can blame others but how far can you blame them and how long?
you may need help but how long until then will you ask someone? is it pride that's in your way? is it fear? is it that you know it all?
there's reasons why i'm writing this blog...and there's reasons why it took me so long to get back into writing again...
so many months of unendless thoughts of realizing many things, i best believe to write down my thoughts here and share it w/ you all...
to update you, i've been searching for God in many different ways...i had a lot of questions for him and there were many things that confuses me overall...as i went on the journey in searching for God, i came to realize that he'd been there right in front of my face along the way..it surprises me now that whatever i do, he's there watching over me...there was never this separation that i just always assumed...assumption can get you in trouble, so if i was you, take my word, pls. don't assume anyone or anything..it will just come back to bother you...
well in my journey i came across darkness and light...darkness lead me to confusion, selfish, jealousy, envy, and stress...the light lead me to joy, happiness, fulfillment w/ love, refresh, and just an awe and wander..
my journey of darkness was not pleasant at all...my thoughts were scattered and my mind was playing games..i became so selfish that i didn't think what others think or feel anymore...i became this person that knows it all...i also became so envy and jealous of people that i tend to fight and argue more w/ people. and w/ all of that, it stressed me out...i couldn't do anything right...i was feeling depressed and overly sensitive. i exaggerated to the point people didn't believe me anymore and just needing that control..but my control was taken from me that, i became lost in the world and confused...who do i turn to? there was no more trust in anybody nor anything...i've lost all the gifts that i was blessed upon..my journey began to feel so exhausting and fatigue..Hope was falling, Faith was disappearing, and just Love was gone...this was such a disappointment to God..but as i was left w nothing, there was still a part of me telling me to get back up and do something about myself...i've searched through family and friends until one family had lead me to the light again...my jouney to the Light was the most inspiring moment of my life.
That life was with God...that is the life I have now. There's more joy, happiness, and love now that I feel...Yes there's still a downside to me b/c i am still human, but majority is the life i've been enjoying as we speak...that light had given me an opportunity to be a manager of Life Source, my confirmation, have my new condo in Hillside, IL, and just a better understanding w/ life and what God had in stored for me. I've opened a part of a gift that I still need to open fully. but first, i have to serve him and that's why i'm writing to you all to share my story. i want you all to know day by day what i learned along the way and how i can or may help you. maybe you will learn something but maybe you won't...this is my journey.........to be continued....
God Bless You All
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| CARINA BELLA MASCARINAS CIANGI WILL BE MISSED....I LOVE HER W/ ALL OF MY HEART
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| cousins reunite from VA BEACH, CHICAGO, NEW JERSEY | | |
| thanks for coming to carina bella's picnichey everybody,
hope everyone had a great weekend...first n foremost though, from me and shalom, we want to thank everyone for coming out this sunday and supporting carina and her family...the benefit picnic was a success...thanks for stoppin by on sunday...we all appreciate you guys and want to just say thank you again from the bottom of our hearts...just knowing we all can count on you is such a great feeling...just know we're both here for all of you too...we both love you guys...
always take care,
love,
ria n shalom | | |
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