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| Musings from a Mother's MindThis is actually my third time to start writing this post. I just now found the 'save' button on here. That will be helpful. So the first thing I'll say I've noticed about being a mother is that it's hard to get much uninterrupted computer time. I'm not complaining though. Who needs much time on a computer when such wonderful real life is unfolding so beautifully right before my eyes?
Thanksgiving was wonderful. I read Deuteronomy 26 today, which is a chapter of thanksgiving. It inspired me to write my own chapter of thanksgiving. I started but never finished. I think I could write til next Tuesday and still not be finished! I have been so richly blessed in every way. Thank You, Lord!!
We bought a car on Wednesday - a 2008 platinum Dodge Magnum. It was a rental car so it's pretty much brand new without the new car price, and still under warranty for a good while. We'll be selling both of our other cars -which were about ready to go anyway- and becoming a one-car family. We actually have been using only one car anyway so I think it'll work out fine. There may be some days when Morgan has the car that I'll wish I could go somewhere but, in reality, there's always plenty for me to do here at home without running off to other fun places. I have many, many more thoughts so that this topic could be a post by itself, but I'll move on for now.
What I really mean to write about now is the collection of thoughts pertaining to motherhood that I've been treasuring up and pondering since beginning the adventure of motherhood.
1) Since becoming a mother, my tolerance for violence in movies or the news has gone way down. It disturbs me much more now. I am also more fearful now. I used to be mostly fearless, figuring that God was in control and writing my life story and I thought it would turn out as a great story no matter what He decided to do with it. I still feel that way, yet I am also aware of how deeply intertwined Morgan's, Logan's, and my lives are and the impact harm to one of us would have for all of us. I know this is largely a matter of keeping my imagination in check and my thoughts in submission to Christ, but it's a greater struggle than ever before.
2) On a lighter note, I also have a low tolerance now for people who drive noisy rigs and idle, rev, or race right outside my window. Perhaps they have never known the peaceful contentment of getting the baby down for the night; nor the frustration when an obnoxious outside noise wakens the baby a moment later.
3) Naps with Logan are among my favorite things. Early on, when he was brand new, we'd sleep with the window open, the sun shining in, and the summer breeze blowing over us. There's just something so calming about having a little bitty human nestled by my side, snoozing away. On sleep-in days, after he's slept his regular 11 nighttime hours, I'll bring him into our bed until we're ready to get up. Even if he's not asleep when we climb in, he'll nestle down and hold real still. He loves to be in Mom and Dad's bed and knows he can only stay if he's good. So sweet!
4) I'm glad God made baby ears so flexible! Sometimes they get awfully wrinkled up.
5) I've said before that I think they should reserve expectant/ new mother parking spots like they do for handicapped people. Then, lo and behold, we pull into the mall parking lot and there are two reserved new mommy spots! I was so excited that I just stood there in the pouring rain and babbled to Morgan about what a wonderful idea that was. They were painted with a big blue square, just like the handicapped spots, but with a white stork instead of the white wheelchair. I love it!
6) My little man is so cute when he sleeps. After I put him down, I look at him for awhile.  Then, on days when he strikes me as especially cute, I run to get the camera and snap a couple pictures.  The thing is, he evidently strikes me as especially cute every day, thus I take nap pictures every day without realizing it.  Then Morgan tries to organize our pictures for the month and says he thinks we have enough nap pictures.   I just can't help myself. 
7) It is such a joy to have Logan as my constant companion and such a sweet little friend. Sure, he adds work to my life but it does not begin to compare with the joy he brings me. Most days, he begins dinner prep with me but then falls asleep for a quick nap until Dad gets home. One day he fell asleep before I began my dinner prep and I missed him so much while I worked in the kitchen alone. During our vacation time, Morgan offered to keep Logan at home while I did my shopping for the week. I thought it was a great idea - help me go faster and all. But as I thought about it more, I couldn't bear the thought of going alone. So I waited til vacation was over and took my little friend with me as usual. He just makes all of life more fun!
 
8) There's more, but that's all I'm sharing for today.
 
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| Quick NoteTomorrow is back to regular life after 8 days of vacation. It's been sweet. I've enjoyed having such long, uninterrupted time with my two men. I got sick for a bit in the middle, but Morgan took excellent care of me. Logan even helped out in his own special way - taking longer naps than usual beside me while I slept or just lying there quietly and playing with his toes. We took both cars to the shop on one of the days and found out today that the Jeep engine needs to be replaced.  Not what we were hoping to hear. Still, I feel so peaceful, rested, rejuvenated, and happy and these are all only light and momentary troubles.
I have lots more to share and pics to post so I'll try to be back soon!
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| Remember The MilkI make task lists. I have for as long as I can remember. In addition, I like to put a time estimate next to each task on my list, then add them up and see how many more hours of work I have than hours in the day or week. Do you think that's weird? People tell me it is.
I guess I write things down on my list because I'm likely to forget them otherwise, or just put them off another day or two. Then, suddenly, 6 months will have gone by and I still haven't gotten around to it. Some could argue that, if I can't remember it, it must not be that big of a deal. But see, my brain works differently. I'll notice a misspelled billboard, the name of my grocery store checker, whether the people I encounter are wearing wedding rings or not - but I won't notice when my carpet needs to be vacuumed or my car needs to be washed. I'll remember your birthday, middle name, and all the words to every verse of a song - but I won't remember the last time my oil was changed or I watered my plant. I'm a procrastinator too, and that has never helped anything.
When I got married, I was especially eager to have an exhaustive list of all my duties so that I wouldn't forget to clean, shop, make dinner... do all those wifely things and basically look like I have it all together. Each week, I would find a piece of scratch paper, write down all my tasks for the week, add up the hours, divide by the days, then attack each day with the determination to accomplish everything on the list. A few months into our marriage, Morgan came across a website called Remember The Milk, into which I can enter all my tasks as well as how often I want to be reminded to do each one. The program then generates a daily task list for me and I save the time of writing it out for myself each week. I love it!
Here's the thing I don't get though: I often hear about women in my stage of life getting bored or trying to find extra activities to fill the day. Sometimes I even hear this from women who work full-time outside the home! So I try to decide... do I do more extra-curricular things than other women? Is is just that I do everything so slowly that I always run out of time? Do I let more time than I realize fall through the cracks as I move from task to task?
For awhile after Logan was born, I'd get really stressed out and frustrated over how little I was able to accomplish. With help from God and Morgan I've relaxed about it all a bit, and now it's mysterious to me rather than frustrating.
Just for fun, here's a copy of my task list. These are, by the way, my goals. I'm not saying everything gets done exactly as is laid out here. There's more in my everyday life too, of course, but I don't put them on my list because they're more just like living than actual tasks - eating, sleeping, showering, feeding and changing and playing with Logan, going to church, cuddling and studying and talking and playing with Morgan, etc...
Daily Every 4 days
Exercise Quiet time Websites (Xanga, Facebook, email,
Make Dinner Read to Logan check other blogs)
Every 5 days Every 6 days
Trash/ recycling Laundry
Weekly Every 10 days
Get Birthday cards/gifts Clean bathroom Make bread
Paint nails/ pluck eyebrows Water plant Shop/ spending tracker
Bible study Clean wedding ring Plan menu
Logan's log (where I enter Logan's Call B, E
growth and development for Story of us (recording our
each week) love story)
Bi-weekly Every 3 weeks
Make hummus Call A Call J, K
Make dip Write B
Wash shower curtain/ sheets/ towels Clean house
Monthly Every 6 months
Weigh/ measure Wash comforter
Send rent check Have ring checked
Logan email (sending updates with pictures
friends and family)
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| Happy Birthday to me!
My birthday was earlier this month. Lots earlier, actually. This post has been on my to-do list for some time now. Anyway... It was a wonderful day. It was the best birthday I could remember - though I remember feeling the same way last year. David was here for the Oregon portion of his leave from Iraq and we got in a dinner at Olive Garden and played The Farming Game until after midnight to usher in my big day.
My birthday included sleeping in, chocolate chip pancakes and caramel iced coffee for breakfast with my two favorite guys (as pictured above), a bluetooth headset from my thoughtful husband, dinner with the whole extended family, and...
Morgan set up a surprise for my birthday. We dropped Logan off with Grandma, then went for a couple's massage! Oh! So nice! I felt soooo good afterward. All the world was a happier place.
 Aunt Marilee got some helium balloons for me and Logan had quite a time with them. They entertained him for a good many days before he beat them to death.
I didn't really think I was getting that much older with this birthday but two things happened that seem at least somewhat age-related.
First, I've had to try to accept the idea that most people aren't either good or bad. In younger years, I think I usually put people in one box or another. "Good" people let me down sometimes, and sometimes I realize that I have quite a bit in common with "bad" people and begin to like them. Part of this came with the current politicians under consideration, but it's more than that too.
Second - it was kind of funny... I found myself in the presence of a small group of college-aged kids with whom I felt I had a few things in common: backgrounds, beliefs, experiences, etc. They were chatting and I decided to jump in and join them. Their response was less than enthusiastic and eventually I faded slowly back out of the group and realized - for the first time ever - I think maybe I'm seen as an older woman now. Not older, like OLD, but older like 'she probably can't relate to us with her husband and little baby and older woman life'. It was kind of weird cause I still feel like I'm in that stage of life, just that I've added more to it. 
And finally...
This picture really has nothing to do with my birthday, but if you had a son this cute wouldn't you post his pictures too?
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| Logan's Nursery Logan's nursery is actually just a corner of Dad and Mom's room. He likes it this way and so do I. He'll be moving into his own room in a few more months but for now it's working out to keep him in our room.
Here's a tour:
This is a (sideways) picture of the quilt made just for him by the nice ladies at church. His quilt hangs on the wall next to his bed.
This is his bed, covered with a beautiful quilt made by our friend, Margie Ferguson. It too was made just for him and is called "Quilt for a Quinnlet".
This is the foot end of his bed, with his soft teddy from Janet, Dad's co-worker, and the white blanket hand-woven by Nana and Granddad's neighbor, Sarah Burr, with a little help from Uncle Mitchell.
This portrait of me hangs on the wall over Logan's head. An incredibly
talented friend of ours, Emily Schultz, wants to use her talents to
help fight abortion by painting portraits of expectant women who are
truly joyful and looking forward to the arrival of their child as a
blessing from God. I was honored to model for her and she generously
made this copy of her painting for me. I am happy to have it displayed
where Logan (and our other children, should the Lord send more) can see
it and know I was happy and excited to be his mother even before he was
born. 
This poem by Great Aunt Mea hangs below the picture.
*Baby Quinn*
What will it's name be? What will it wear?
Will it have blue eyes? Will it have hair?
How much will it weigh? How long will it be?
Do you think I could get it to smile at me?
It might be a boy - or it may be a girl-
Its hair (when it grows) will possibly curl:
Its bound to inherit a beautiful grin
And an itty bitty cleft on its itty bitty chin;
Its booties will cover two small perfect feet
(bared, of course for walks on the beach)
Its teeny starfish hands will steer imaginary bikes -
Its waving macaroni legs strong-kneed for future hikes;
The heart that beats 'neath the warm fuzzy nighty
Will be divine work of our LORD God Almighty;
This fact alone gives enough cause for joy
whether freckled or female or brown-eyed or boy~
(and one last word on my great nephniece...
if it's bald, let me know~ I'll send a hairpiece.)
~With thanks to God, from Great Aunt Mea sometime in 2008.
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I love Logan's nursery because it reminds me of all the people who contributed something to it and the love each part represents.
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