im backkkkk!

ugh. im back ! i hope i stay here for good, coming here means me actually dieting, i love the comments from all the girls it helps me stay strong and go through with it, life has been hell, all ive done is eat pizza every day it is awful i gained 5lbs from the last time i was here and i hadnt gained weight for the past 2 years because i was on birth control but now that im off it and eating and eating all day ive gained. i work a full time job 8am to 5:30pm and go to school mondays and thursdays from 5:40-8:10pm i also just payed my gym for a 3 month membership so i shall go, i need strength ! the strength to get me started on this healthier way of eaating and staying on it, so far so good, i had special k cereal with 2% milk. and a whole water bottle, BUT my head is now starting to hurt and im starting to get hungry i spend the whole day sitting down in front of a computer so i get bored :\ sucks !

today i dont have school since its martin luther king day, so haha ! gym perhaps ? ughh i hope ! good day !

horrible

i am so sad and depressed i just wanna go to sleep and forget eveything thats going on.

i havent updated, i havent had time and i completely broke all the rules and broke the damn diet really bad, i hate myself right now ive been non stop eating all these bad foods. i fucking hate myself, the thing is i started this new job and i dont have time to come home and eat, and everything out there is unhealthy so go figure, besides the fact that i have a pizza place right next door to my job so ive been drinking soda, eatin pizza, kill me ! whatever i hope to get back on track next week wish me luck.

♥

i havent updated for the past two or three days i think. sorry !

BUT i have kept strong and been healthy except yesterday.

Friday, i think i ate like hard boiled egg, with enlgihs muffin and strawberry for breakfast. then snack my little 100 calorie pack snacks, then lunch, chicken soup with half a banana, 100 cal. snack, and a few peanuts, and no dinner :) lots of water.

Yesterday saturday was horrible. I went with my girlfriends to the Buzz bake sale concert, i walked and sweat alot, i was there from 11am till 10;45pm so i was pretty much walking around the whole day and jumping up and down i had lots of water.

B-cereal with 2% milk

S- 100 calorie snacks and water

L-probably some chips or smthing or some other snack.

D- hotdog, just the inside no bread, arepa, which is the latin sweet corn with cheese type of thing, only half though and soda ! yeah i know, shoot me but i had to, but not alot i promise.

 and that was it for yesterday, lots of walking though. got home around 12;30am super tired, dead, showered and knocked out.

so far today

B- cereal with 2% milk, + 80 cal. waffle.

L- (very small portions) like fist/knuckle smaller lol. white rice, beans, and meat.

water intake 3 glasses so far. lets see how the rest of the day progresses im sure ill do fine. i am dying my hair red im excited but kinda nervous at the same time lol. lets see how it goes.

today . .

ugh, today math class was good, i have a test that i should be studying for on friday but ill study tomorrow.

B- hard boiled egg, english muffin, little oj, and water !

S- ham and cheese and banana :(

L- chicken soup with banana

S- oreo cookies mini pack - 150 cal. im an idiot !

D- cooked chicken .

water intake about 7 cups i'd say.

lets hope tomorrow i do better ! ggrrr.

So today is my first real diet day. but i cant starve myself i figured out that much; i just gotta change the way i eat and the things i eat so that was my attempt.

B- Cereal, skim milk, water = 150 cal.

S-Little pieces of ham and cheese some crackers and water

L- salad with cooked ham, boiled egg, and little pieces of bacon, i didnt eat alot though it was my first time eating salad. lots of water.

S- chips 150calories

S- weight watchers little ice cream 60 cal. :) it was awesome !

D- still undecided :( tuna or smthing maybe not sure; maybe a tuna salad god knows. !

im so mad ! i got into an argument with my dad cus he's all freaked out about not dieting right and blah blah blah, and hes scared that im not being healthy and i wnated to go buy some healthy foods like low calories stuff and hes being all stupid.

well i had my psychology project today we did great we got an A now i have to do homework for my math class so good bye. Hope everyone is doing gggooood :)