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| Your Baby's Name Is Gay-denTop 14 Most Popular Male Baby Names of 2007, according to BabyNames.com:
1 AIDAN
2 BRADEN
3 KADEN
4 ETHAN
5 CALEB
6 NOAH
7 JADEN
8 CONNOR
9 LANDON
10 JACOB
11 JACKSON/JAXON
12 ELIJAH
13 GAVIN/GAVAN
14 DYLAN
Seriously...THESE names are the MOST popular names? When I was a kid, there were like six Christophers in my grade, since Christopher was one of the most popular names the year I was born. That mean that in about 10 years, some poor bastard's (not literal) fifth grade class will be filled with six Aidans, four Bradens, three Kadens and a couple of Jadens. Well, not exactly in those numbers. There will be some Aydins, some Braidyns, some Caydins and some Jhaidons. Because apparently you can spell your baby's name any way you like. I blame this on Bush.
My daughter's name will be Maiden. My son's name will be Baden Baden. And my dog's name will be John.
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| 2008 Season PreviewI needed something fun and easy to read so I picked up "Now I Can Die in Peace" by Bill Simmons, a writer for ESPN.com. Now, I have always enjoyed Simmons' columns, I'll admit that. I would describe him sort of as like the average joe fan who turns out to be an above average writer. Not a great writer; it's a bit harder to read in book form and he definitely pales in comparison to other some-time ESPN contributers like Klosterman and Easterbrook. Those guys are on a whole different level.
Regardless, the focus of the book is about the journey of the 2004 Red Sox and all their long-suffering fans. 86 years between world championships for them, 1918 to 2004 (quickly followed by 2007, of course). And though Simmons' refuses to use the word "curse" to describe the plight of Red Sox fans, he incessantly harps about how "this always happens to us", saying how they're so unlucky or this is so terrible, or it's so hard to root for this team, blah blah blah.
What a bunch of whiny crap.
Look, unless you're actually like 86 years old, I don't buy any of this garbage about how long you've been suffering. This guy is like 10 years older than me, so I'll give him like 10 more years of following his team, so that takes him to around 1976 or 1977. That's like 30 seasons of baseball, out of which the Red Sox have only posted 5 seasons with losing records. The most they lost in a single season in that span was 89 games. They went to the playoffs 7 times from 1976 to 2003. So why are you crying so much you gigantic baby.
The Tigers last won a World Series in 1984. I was 5 at the time and had lived in Michigan for all of two months at that point, so I had no idea what was going on. I started to follow baseball in 1986 and was heartbroken when they lost in the playoffs in 1987. Now. Since 1986, the Tigers have posted 16 seasons with losing records, including four 100+ loss seasons. I almost feel like that 119 loss monstrosity in 2003 should count double. Even if a "Red Sox fan" could love their team as much as I love mine, you really think you've had it harder? You think you're that freaking important? Just shut up.
In my lifetime, we've had two playoff appearances (1987 and 2006). Both times we fielded excellent teams, and yet somehow ended up losing to, by any objective measure, the TWO WORST WORLD SERIES "CHAMPIONS" OF ALL TIME ('87 Twins, '06 Cards). You can't know what this feels like. It's like having your girlfriend stolen from you by Screech from Saved By the Bell. Twice.
And enough with the whole "Red Sox - Yankees is the best rivalry in sports" garbage. It's a great rivalry, no doubt, and for the time being, it's the best rivalry in baseball. But the best rivalry in the history of sports, past present or future, is Michigan - Ohio State. End of story.
My team has been terrible for most of my life. And if I were like a Red Sox fan, I would be crying and peeing all over myself, saying "Oh no....what if I grow old and die before my team wins a World Series?" Such a fan would use that as an excuse to expect the worst, to bail on their team when times get rough. Rough times? Try living through a 119 loss season. Seriously.
But even in 2003, I wasn't bemoaning my fate of rooting for a doomed team. Hell no. I believed that things would be better. Maybe not right away, but I didn't jump ship, I loved them with all their faults, maybe even because of their faults. And whether it was 1987, 2003 or 2006, I knew I would someday see the Tigers win the World Series. And not later on, like on my death bed. I knew I would see it in the foreseeable future. I knew it then. I know it now. I will see it happen.
So listen. I could give an exhaustive player-by-player breakdown about how I think the season will go. I could do that. I could give a Peter Gammons-esque list of things that need to break right for something to maybe happen, i.e. "if player X stays healthy, if player Y breaks out, then maybe Team Z has a shot at making noise in the playoffs." I did this last year. I said, "if the Tigers stay healthy, they could win 90 to 105 games." But what good is that? It's useless. It's gutless.
What is objectivity? What is factual truth? Can we ever truly know if the "facts" we hold to be true really are true? Is foresight any different from memory? Perhaps; knowledge of past is more than mere scienter; it's memory corroborated by extrinsic evidence. Maybe knowledge of the future seems less substantial; belief corroborated by nothing more than hope. But if that belief and that hope are strong and virtuous enough, maybe that foundation is no less shaky than that of the "facts" we take for granted.
Maybe that seems tangential, but the point is this: THE DETROIT TIGERS WILL WIN THE 2008 WORLD SERIES. And that's a fact.
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| Bad BreakupI'm so tired of hack writers comparing everything to relationships or girls. Especially with respect to sports. It's always something like "Drafting Plaxico Burress on your fantasy football team is like dating a really hot but crazy chick; yeah she's super hot, but most of the time you're scared to death she's going to screw you over," or "Being a Knicks fan is like having an anorexic girlfriend," or "Matt Millen is a dirty whore." Blah blah blah. It's tired. But I guess this is my fair warning, because here comes another analogy. And I guess I'm hoping that by acknowledging that my approach may be trite and hackneyed, that my post will somehow become un-trite and un-hackneyed. Unlikely, but at least I tried.
But look. On many levels, following a sports team passionately is a lot like having a relationship. You give a lot of your time and effort to it, you start a lot of sentences with the words "I love...", you get mad for irrational reasons and you see the best in your team even though nobody else does. Maybe it's delusional, mostly the part where we feel like the team ever gives anything back to us, but then hey, maybe love is too.
But the thing that I think is different between real relationships and the love affairs people have with their teams is the serious commitment people put into their teams. In love, people break up, get divorced, or run away with their secretary all the time. In sports, you rarely see a fan abandon his team for another team (and if they do, they are disparaged as horrible people who don't deserve to live).
I have, within the framework of each major sport (MLB, NBA, NHL, NFL,
college football, college basketball), been devoutly monogamous to each
of my hometown teams (Tigers, Pistons, Red Wings, Lions, Wolverines)
for over 20 years. Okay, yeah, maybe I flirted a bit with Spartan
basketball, but U-M basketball and I are "on a break"...and that's
something that U-M basketball wanted, not me. And bottom line, U-M
basketball is still first in my heart, no matter how many other guys
she sleeps with. But I'm writing now because I've decided that after
all this time, it's time for a break-up, a real, permanent break-up.
It's time to break up with the Detroit Lions.
Just to be clear, this isn't one of those amicable break-ups, where both people realize that they don't love each other anymore, or that it's time to move on. This isn't something where lovers remain friends. No. This is one of those nasty breakups. This is one of those breakups where you absolutely loathe the other person. This is one of those breakups where you yell and scream and cry and yell and fight and bite and punch and defecate on the other persons porch. This is one of those breakups when you want them to die.
I hate the Lions. I hate them. I want them to lose next week. I want them to lose the week after. I want them to get a top draft pick in the 2008 draft and use their #1 pick to acquire another wide receiver who then gets injured and never plays football again. I want Jon Kitna to guarantee 10 wins again next year and then lose 16. I want Ford Field to burn to the ground. I want every Lions ticket holder to boycott every single game. I want the Lions to be the butt of every bad joke, every easy punchline, of every sportscaster on all the tv sets in all the world. I want them to live miserably and die miserably. I want them to suffer as much as I have suffered, then a thousand times more.
I was extremely apathetic about the Lions' hot start this year (see my post below). But a couple of weeks ago, something in me just snapped. This is the end of the road. We're done. We're through. Die a painful death. Die. Die. Die.
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| HOT HOT HOT STOVEGO TIGERS!
Well, I haven't received this many calls / emails at once about the Tigers since Magglio hit that walk-off in October 2006. (Pause. Sigh. Tear. Okay.) What a trade! Earlier in the day, I was actually angered by potential talk of making Miller and Maybin available. Specifically, the rumor I heard first was Miller and Maybin for Erik Bedard of the Orioles. I thought that was too much to give up. But when I heard of the deal that did go through, Miller and Maybin and a grab bag of players for Miguel Cabrera and Dontrelle Willis, my first reaction was shock. I had, over the past couple of years, grown seriously attached to our high-ceiling prospects. But as this deal grew on me, I am thinking that mere potential pales in comparison to potential that has already been realized. Especially when that potential has been manifested in a player like Cabrera, who is already considered one of the top 5 hitters in the game, and is only 24 years old. Twenty-four!
Dontrelle I am not so psyched about; he is a big risk. Only 25, but it appears his best years are behind him already. Maybe he can become rejuvenated, but even during his near-Cy Young season (2005), I thought he was severely overrated. But as the secondary acquisition in this trade, I'll take him, and he gives us more depth in our rotation.
But seriously, what is the deal with all of the Marlins that Tigers GM (former Marlins GM) Dave Dombrowski is collecting on the team? Sheffield, Renteria and, of course, Leyland were all on the 1997 World Series "champion" Marlins team. Willis, Cabrera and Pudge were on the 2003 World Series "champion" Marlins team. Not to mention, Todd Jones and Nate Robertson came to us from the Marlins as well. Ridikkulus!
Now the Tigers gave up a TON in this deal, but I think most people are agreed that hey, you have to give up a lot to get alot. I can't believe this is the same team that lost 119 games in 2003. Well, it's not the same team...if the Tigers now trade Brandon Inge, there will be no remaining position players from that terrible '03 squad...
Let's take a look at this formidable lineup and how it was built by Dombrowski (and of course, a big hand goes to owner Mike Ilitch, who again is showing that he will spend what it takes to build a winner, just as he did for the Wings. Fans who doubted Mr. Ilitch's commitment to winning in the late 90's and up until 2004 should be ashamed of themselves; there's just no trust anymore. Mr. Ilitch made the mistake of making some very poor personnel decisions, particularly at the GM positions, but once he hired DD, I didn't doubt at all that Ilitch would start spending again once we had a shot at winning, even though the payroll was drastically reduced in 2003. Have some faith people! Anyone who bashed Ilitch should not be allowed to be a Tigers or Wings fan. And seriously, in a town that has to put up with the Fords and a country that has to put up with the Bushes, you'd think that people would realize what a GOOD owner / manager looks like? Alas...that's not how it works...):
1. Curtis Granderson - Center Field
Credentials: 2007 - .302/.361/.552, 122 R (3rd in AL), 38 2B, 23 3B (1st in MLB), 23 HR, 26 SB, Third player in history with 20/20/20/20, Finished 10th in AL MVP voting.
Acquired: Drafted by Tigers in 2002 draft, 3rd round.
2. Placido Polanco - Second Base
Credentials: 2007 - .341 BA (3rd in AL), 105 R, AL All-Star Game Starter, AL Silver Slugger Award, AL Gold Glove Award, Finished 19th in AL MVP voting. 2006 - ALCS MVP.
Acquired: Traded from Phillies mid-season 2005 for Ugueth Urbina.
3. Gary Sheffield - Designated Hitter
Credentials: 2007 - .307/.410/.560, 21 HR, 78 R, 52 RBI in 1st half last year before slowed by shoulder injury in 2nd half; still finished with 107 R, 22 SB, and 84 walks against only 71 strikeouts.
Acquired: Traded from Yankees in 2006/2007 offseason for Humberto Sanchez, Kevin Whelan, Anthony Claggett
4. Magglio Ordonez - Right Field
Credentials: 2007 - AL Batting Champion (.363), 1.029 OPS, 54 2B (1st in MLB), 28 HR, 139 RBI (2nd in MLB), AL Silver Slugger, Finished 2nd in AL MVP voting.
Acquired: Signed as free agent from White Sox in 2004/2005 offseason.
5. Miguel Cabrera - Third Base
Credentials: 2007 - .320/.401/.565, 91 R, 34 HR, 119 RBI, Finished 15th in NL MVP voting. 2006 - 5th in NL MVP voting.
Acquired: Traded along with Dontrelle Willis from Marlins yesterday for Andrew Miller, Cameron Maybin, four others.
6. Carlos Guillen - First Base
Credentials: 2007 - .296/.357/.502, 21 HR, 102 RBI, AL All-Star Team. 2006 - .318, 100 R, 19 HR, 85 RBI, 10th in AL MVP voting, Detroit Tigers Player of the Year.
Acquired: Traded from Seattle Mariners in 2003/2004 offseason for Ramon Santiago, Juan Gonzalez (pitcher).
7. Edgar Renteria - Shortstop
Credentials: Four-time All-Star, Two-time Gold Glove winner. 2007 - .332/.390/.470, 87 R, 12 HR, 57 RBI in 124 games.
Acquired: Traded from Braves in October for Jair Jurrjens and Gorkys Hernandez.
8. Ivan Rodriguez - Catcher
Credentials: First ballot Hall of Famer, 14-time All-Star, 13-time Gold Glove winner, 1999 AL MVP. 2007 - .281 average, 31 2B, 63 RBI.
Acquired: Signed as free agent from Marlins in 2003/2004 offseason.
9. Jacque Jones / Marcus Thames / Brandon Inge - Left Field / Utility
Credentials: Hit 27 HRs in 2006 / Hit 26 HRs in 2006 / Hit 27 HRs in 2006
Acquired: Traded from Cubs this offseason for Omar Infante / Signed as minor league free agent in 2003/2004 offseason / Drafted by Tigers in 1998, 2nd round.
That is one ridiculous lineup. The rotation is good too. Not as crazy scary as the lineup, but still pretty good:
1. Justin Verlander - RHP
Credentials: 2007 - 18-6, 3.66 ERA, 183 Ks, fifth in Cy Young voting (tie), no-hitter.
Acquired: Drafted by Tigers in 2004 draft, 1st round.
2. Kenny Rogers - LHP
Credentials: 210 career wins, 5 Gold Glove awards. Injured for much of 2007, went 3-4, 4.43 ERA. Fifth in Cy Young award voting in 2006, started 2006 All-Star game for AL, went 3-0, 0.00 ERA, 23 IP, 19 K in 2006 postseason.
Acquired: Signed as free agent from Rangers in 2005/2006 offseason.
3. Jeremy Bonderman - RHP
Credentials: 9-1, 3.48 ERA, 98 Ks in first half of 2007; appeared to be hampered by elbow injury during second half and pitched poorly. Full recovery expected by spring training. 14-8, 4.08, 202 Ks in 2006.
Acquired: Traded from Oakland, along with Carlos Pena and Franklyn German, in three team trade including Yankees, for Jeff Weaver.
4. Dontrelle Willis - LHP
Credentials: Started 2007 5-1 but struggled the entire year, still managing to pitch 200+ innings for third consecutive year. Cy Young award runner-up in 2005 after 22-10, 2.63 ERA season.
Acquired: Traded along with Miguel Cabrera from Marlins yesterday for Andrew Miller, Cameron Maybin, four others.
5. Nate Robertson - LHP
Credentials: Expected to break out in 2007 after lowering ERA in each of four previous seasons, but struggled for reasons unknown. Posted career-best 13 wins and 3.84 ERA in 2006.
Acquired: Traded from Florida in 2002/2003 offseason as part of Mark Redman deal.
The reason I list the "Acquired" section for each player listed above is to show that this team was built shrewdly. None of the players given away in trades have yet become a star player. The most successful player has been Jeff Weaver, and that's not a lot of success at all, especially considering the package we got for him.
If anything, the only questionable moves have been to let certain players just walk away, such as the 2007 comeback players of the year, Carlos Pena and Dmitri Young. Either of these players would have definitely contributed last year. There is talk now of letting Chris Shelton go, and I think it's a mistake at this point.
Oh my god, I love the Tigers. After all these years of suffering, after nineteen years of just pure misery, I can't believe that this is what I am being treated to. I mean, seriously...
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| The BCS Mess Part IINearly 4 years ago on this site, I wrote about how the BCS should be fixed (changing the BCS system to a simple average of the two polls, using computers only to break a tie). They didn't enact my exact plan, but close enough that the system works a lot better than it did then.
But after this season of ups and downs in college football, it's clear there is no way to isolate only two teams that should play for the national championship. And more and more, I'm getting on board with a playoff system. I always thought that a limited playoff would be best, like four teams, to preserve the prestige of the bowls and the integrity of regular season games.
Now, I think an eight team playoff would work, because it uses the system we already have in place, which are the four major bowls (Rose, Orange, Sugar, Fiesta). You use those four bowls as the first round matchups (on or around Jan. 1), then a week later, have the semi-final matchups (use two of the above four locations), then another week later, have the BCS Championship game (using one of the remaining locations).
Participants in the eight team playoff would be the champions of the six major conferences (Big Ten, Pac-10, Big East, Big 12, ACC, SEC) plus two at-large or "wildcard" teams. You could keep very similar rules to determining at-large participants to the BCS bowl games, but with less room to maneuver with only two at-large spots, as opposed to four.
- A non-BCS conference team (e.g. Boise State, Hawaii) would gain an at-large bid by finishing in the top 10 in the BCS rankings.
- No conference may have more than two schools in the playoff.
- Notre Dame gets an automatic bid if it finishes in the top 8.
- Applying the above rules first, you would then choose the teams who did not win their conference but are ranked highest in the polls.
- Seeding will be based on the BCS standings, and matchups will be determined by seeding except that conference affiliations with a specific bowl will take precedence. The Big Ten champ will always play the Pac-10 champ in the Rose Bowl, the SEC champ will always go to Sugar Bowl, the Big 12 champ to Fiesta bowl and ACC champ to Orange bowl.
I know the Notre Dame rule makes no sense, but that's how the rules are now. It's not ideal, but I'm just trying to appease the most people here. Most of the rules above are the same or slight modifications to existing BCS bowl selection rules, but the last rule is one I added and I think it's important. While the BCS bowls may lose a little luster by being only "quarterfinals" of the real championship, they gain I think by preserving their conference affiliations. Instead of the Rose Bowl going out of their way to choose Illinois this year (seriously, what???) they can have their Big Ten / Pac 10 matchup every single year, just like they want.
Using the above rules, this season's bowl season would look something like this:
Rose Bowl: #1 Ohio State vs. #7 USC
Sugar Bowl: #2 LSU vs. #10 Hawaii
Orange Bowl: #3 Virginia Tech vs. #9 West Virginia
Fiesta Bowl: #4 Oklahoma vs. #5 Georgia
Second round, you would reseed the matchups, highest remaining ranking against lowest remaining ranking and so forth.
Now is this not a few weeks of some fantastic football? Now even, with eight teams in the playoff, you're going to have a few teams complaining. Under this scenario, it would be primarily #6 Mizzou and #8 Kansas. But you know what? This is a playoff to determine the national champion! Mizzou lost TWICE to Oklahoma, so I'm pretty sure they're #2 at best. So forget them. And Kansas' schedule is a joke; if they didn't play such a sorry schedule then they wouldn't be ranked #8 in the first place; it's their own fault.
The problem, though, is that with so few at-large spots, I'm not sure it's fair to give automatic bids to every league champion. So I would also include another rule (I don't know if this would ever fly, but this is just my idea) that would prevent any conference champion ranked lower than #12 from competing in the playoff. We'll call this the "Big East Rule".
Of course, if people wanted to add more at-large teams to this down the line, we can have "play-in" games for the at-large spots, which would take place the second week in January. That could theoretically increase the number of teams in the playoff to ten. But that's just an option. And then you'd be adding too many games; with the above plan, you just add the two additional semifinal games, and that way, the other lesser bowls don't complain too much that no one is going to watch their games. By only adding two additional games, lesser bowl games won't become like the NIT, i.e. a ridiculous waste of time, but can remain nice rewards for solid but unspectacular seasons.
Bottom line, I think the format outlined above does the best job of balancing tradition, the interests of the conferences (major and mid-major), the schools, the major bowls, the minor bowls and producing some crazy entertaining games. Please copy and paste the above text and send in an email to your local sportswriter, football coach or celebrity spokesperson. Thanks.
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As a postscript, let's see what last year would have looked like under this system:
Rose Bowl: #1 Ohio State vs. #5 USC
Sugar Bowl: #2 Florida vs. #8 Boise State
Fiesta Bowl: #10 Oklahoma vs. #4 LSU
Orange Bowl: #3 Michigan vs. #6 Louisville
*ACC Champ Wake Forest (#14) did not qualify for the playoff under the Big East Rule.
Wow. That's crazy awesome entertaining too.
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