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| Darkness, Everybody...Darkness Is Spreading.
Well, this is how it goes. It's past 5AM, and I'm working on two papers that were due last week. So, of course, it's the perfect opportunity to write another update in the ol' Xanga. Nothing about the East Coast trip just yet, as I'm too out of it to recollect properly, but random stuff for now.
Sometime this year, aka 2004, I was talking with my friend's friend, and he mentioned how much he hated those animated dancing babies. At first I thought he couldn't be talking about the Ally McBeal popularized baby, but, sadly, yes he was. Then I thought, 'where the hell have you been buddy?' It's 2004, and you are about seven, eight (has it been that long, or am I just overshooting) years behind. I'm mean, he really sounded peeved, and serious, and also tried to make it seem contemporarily pertinent. Finally, I thought, 'Man, if this person can associate back to me within two degrees of separation, I gotta be careful on who I choose to interact with.' I mean, honestly. Come on. That's a bit reaching. Guh.
Okay. So I have this retard friend. His name is Danny. Danny McManus. Yes you, you retard. He is the guy with the AIM screenname with 'wifebeater' in it, of course in a positive light, consistent with his glorious retardedcy. And is the same guy that jokes about turning this short, Chinese guy at the Davis arcade gay. And is the same guy who had an even shorter Chinese guy hitting on him at said arcade. Anyways, this retard friend was drinking at my apartment, in my room, when he opens another forty. Because he's a retard, he promptly drops the forty less than a foot off the ground, on its base. A full forty. So, this causes it to foam like his rabid stupidity, and geyser all over my room. Retardus Maximus then claims the bottle was 'too slippery'. Now my bathroom smells like beer, since that's where he took the geysering bottle. Man, where's euthanasia when you really need it. (No, you aren't going to live this one down, combined with your other antics. Ass.)
This weekend was all about video games (entered the Davis Monthly tourney, and got my 3rd place, meaning a $1 profit. HOT SHIT.) and Texas Hold Em'. Both are good. And both don't involve me doing my papers that were due last week.
Being more mature than anybody reading this line, I find it amazing that at least three times in the past week a conversion around people's whose first name is 'Dick' arose. I mean, WOW, how inconsistent with me, considering how so utterly mature I am, right? Haha. Ha. Ha? Well, this part isn't true, but I never started these conversations, but I will make a canonical list of such people, right here:
Dick Pole, former baseball player and current baseball coach.
Dick Butkus (pronounced BUTT-KISS), former football player.
Dick Trickle, NASCAR driver.
Dick Pound, head of the World Anti-Doping Agency
Dick Assman, that guy that David Letterman called a few years ago.
Private Dick, term for a private detective.
Oh...wait, do you hear that? That's me digging my head out of the gutter. Yea, it's been excavated. Whew. (One thing of note...World Anti-Doping Agency? Are you serious about that name? Is it me, or does it sound funny? WADA? Like, "WA DA fuck did you take this name for?" Come on...seriously...ugh.
The Shield on FX. Best TV show. I swear, it's great. I guess you could call it "Training Day: The Series", but there isn't really much training, I suppose. But it does take place in Los Angeles, and is pretty raw and gritty. But it's a damn good show. #1 for right now. I could blah-blah why it's so good, but my train of though derailed right now, and I really don't want to make a commercial/review about it. Anyways, I suppose my top five shows of all time, in no particular order are: The Shield, 24, ER, The Practice, and The Simpsons. So, chances are, if your show has two characters in it or two words, with the first one being 'The', I'll really like it. Although I watched a TON of television when I was little, almost any prime-time show, since my bedtime was 10-11PM when I was in elementary school, I really can't count those shows, because the memory of those shows are a bit fuzzy. I don't watch as much TV nowadays, but I guess others in the top 10 include OZ (two characters), The Sopranos (hey, the rule sticks), and...well, Duck Tales (damn, rule failed). Honestly. I watched a few episodes lately, and the quality still sticks today. Unlike other shows I have watched recently because I liked them when I was little, and they suck now (like Garfield and Friends...what the hell man, this show really sucks if you watch it now), it's damn good. Maybe even top 10 good.
Man, I rambled on about the tv. Cool. Whatever. More Duck Tales please, DVD now. If I could be a television network producer for one day, to get a big payoff, my one move would be: put MacGyver on TV, prime-time, against any other show on the network. Ratings? Yup. Advertising would sell on that show like hotcakes with diamonds in the batter. Plus, Richard Dean Anderson, aka MacGyver, has a mullet on that show. Mullets in the '00 decade sell. Oh yea.
Garfield and Friends. MAN. WHAT THE HELL. Really is not good. Don't you hate when that happens? Being around 20, having something 5, 10, or 15 years removed from viewing/listening something you really had fond memories of, only to recollect it now, and realizing how much it sucks? That perhaps is the worst feeling in the world. Ever since that time when 'waiting-for-the-next-episode/song/whathaveyou' turns into 'reminiscing-about-that-episode/song/whathaveyou', you place that thing on a pedestal, reliving the same feelings you had when you were little. Then you get excited for rediscovering it sometime later, often out of the blue. Then it sucks. That is absolutely crushing.
Oh man, gotta stop talking about TV. Gotta work on my papers. Well, maybe a 'quick' nap first. | | |
| Isn't A John Stockton When You Do Someone Up The Butt?
This wonderful quote appeared in one of the comics in the Daily UC Davis newspaper, the California Aggie. It was supposed to mark how out of touch most Davis students are with general things...I guess...whatever. I mean...well, I think the quote speaks more for the comic (based on the premise) more than I can, so I shut up now.
Um...again, long drought of updates...so...that means random shizzle. Off to the races!
Okay, I am a culinary genie-us. So, I've been drinking soy milk lately, instead of regular milk. Soy milk tastes really sweet for me now, and normal milk just tastes odd. Funny, because soy milk started out tasting like crap, but I guess it's an acquired taste undermined by whatever additives, or lack thereof. Or it could because my parents let me take a whole box load of the stuff for free (Costco bought), as you can store it without refrigeration. Anyways, I loves me some New England clam chowder, and I bought some condensed versions of it, unbeknowknestenst to me. No normal milk being in the house, I figure I'd give soy milk a shot. I AM THE SMARTEST MAN, IN ALL THE LAND. It was like really, watery, sweet, and most importantly, CRAPTASTIC TO THE X-TREME (lack of e, capitaliztion, AND hyphenation baby). HOLY CRAP. WHAT THE HELL. NO. Worst thing ever, I swear. Sweet clam chowder. Boo. Kick me.
I never watched the show, but you know that Queer Eye for the Straight Guy show? I heard you can sign up people for it, or whatever. But what if they came to said straight guy, and simply said "perfect", then just left to actually find someone worthwhile to produce a show on?
If you know me, you know what I think are the greatest inventions of all time. Number One Overall: Flushable Toilet. Number One Offensive Weapon: THE CANNON. Now, I must reiterate this next one, but the invention most capable of making us humanas bow down; Number One Human-Bow-Downer-Thingie: Orange Cone. Fat Elvis on the Throne, is there nothing a person can do about an orange cone? We all drive this huge ass vehicles, with 98234186421 horsepower, weighing 398217 pounds and travelling at 193287 mph (what hyperbole?) and these things just pimpslap us. Everybody obeys the cone. There might be a comrade cone that got inadvertently ran over, but you know that driver was thinking "Oh Shit, I hope the police don't find out." Yea, you know what's up. Orange Cone, baby. On city streets, when they are there on the road, one gets all worried, and tries to avoid it if possible. If the orange cone wants you in a single file line, you will obey. I could go on, but I am not worthy to sing the praises of The Cone. There you have it...The Triumverate Of Power: Toilet, Cannon, Cone.
UC Davis student council/senate/jerk election time. Does anybody really care? Seriously, what the fuck. All schools have these jerks, nobody cares. NOBODY CARES. No one knows the 'platform' these fools be running on, nor do they have any real power besides lower the price of coffee by 2 cents at the student center for one week. These people get 99.9bar% of their votes from their direct friends, and subsequent degrees of separation. We had an insert in today's paper about, and guess what? Most of them were Political Science majors. That means getting elected to a friggin college "student jerk council" will be the pinnacle of their working careers. Yes, at around 20 years old, these people are peaking. They are peaking with a 'job' that will grant them power to do whatever they collectively want to do with $500. And they will argue what to do with that $500, and will be in my stupid paper arguing about that $500. oOoOoOooOOooOooo, now that's some real POWER, SON! No offense to anybody that's reading this that is a poli sci major. No, check that. BWAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAAHA
AAAAAAAHAHAHAHHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAAH*tear*AHHAHAHAHAHA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAA*choke*HAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAA
AAAAAAAAA. AND I DO WANT FRIES WITH THAT.
Oh yea, I went to Boston/New York this past weekend.
But I suppose I should write on that a bit later, so I have some material, so I don't have to wait 3 months to write another entry. (Can the three people that read this actually believe people (i.e. three) pester me to update? Anything to perpetuate the procrastination of actual work. You know how we do.) | | |
| ULTRA VARIETY PRIVATE MEMORIES!!!!!!!!!1
Wheeeeee...long ass time between journal entries again. Mostly because I've been really lazy. And Gunbound. Anyhoo...last entry of 2003.
Thanksgiving break was interesting. Food was good. But the important thing that will be remembered is the T.K.O. from To-Ky-O...Tea. Yes, the Tokyo Tea knockout, felt in Los Gatos. It was one of them wake up not recalling to previous night, with a really empty wallet type of nights. Along with puking off the porch. FUN! The best thing about those nights, as I've probably said a few times before, is having your friends piece together the night for you, as well as the next time you see those people. Wheeeeeee.
Otherwise, since then, sleep, sleep, sleep, X-Mas Break....hell ya. Onto the randomness!
Peanut butter and jelly/jam sammiches. We all can make them. But how come there are still people out there who spread the jelly/jam with a knife? HONESTLY! Why would you go and do that, when there is a spoon to be used? Do people not understand it is like 3098721% easier with a spoon? And don't talk to me about PB&J skills, dammit. I think the same people that make such sandwiches with a knife for the jelly/jam do not comprehend the fact the back side of a spoon can be used to spread stuff. And I bet those people use the same knife, without wiping for both the PB and the J. Dammit.
My hair is weighty. I put goops of hair mousse in it, enough so that when one branch of hair goes out of place, it pulls the rest of my scalp with it. So, to remedy this I go to the bathroom (at BJs, that time), when a guy says to me "It looks fine," when I hadn't spent more than 1 second fixing the scalp puller. I'm not homophobic or anything, but that's just odd to me. It's one of those "Uhh"-type of moments. I hadn't even done much to fix my hair. Doesn't sound like much...but the situation was awkward. Maybe the guy just really hated the narcissistic-type, but jeez. Oh well.
After Christmas sales are wiggy. They fun, but they annoying. It sucks to be in a department store, but you feel better after you get your loot. I'm just happy the registers brokedown when I was gonna buy something, and when I returned a few days later, it was like 40% off. Wheeee. Burning money on my once-every-two-years clothes buying. Honestly, that's about how long it takes me to buy clothes. I still have many a thing from high school....even pajama/workout stuff from middle school...hahaha.
Gunbound is good. gunbound.net Go play dammit. It's like Worms, and if you don't know what that is, it's like Scorched Earth, and if you don't know what that is, it's like fun, in multi-player mode. Go play. My screenname on that is: YourHero. Because it's true. It's DAMN true.
Ahh...well....no more writing for this year. Have a happy new years celebration, one and all. And, no, I do not give refunds on brain cells for you having wasted your time reading my Xanga. You knew what you were getting into. | | |
| Good Luck On The Test Everyone! I'm Gonna Go And Smoke Some Weed.
These words were uttered as a classmate of mine in Sociology turned in her test, and walked her way back down the aisle. Honestly. Everybody started busting out laughing at this loud declaration, then we all realized the prof wasn't even in the room. A lot of murmurs happened, and I supposed cheating occured. Guh. Hahaha.
Davis. Best damned bus system in college, I suppose. It's really good. We are also famous for the double-decker buses Davis employs, the exact style of the ones in ye olde Britain. Even has famous British stops on it. But you know the best thing about it is? Sitting on the upper deck, knowing the driver is going to purposely take turns fast, then watch as a girl goes flying from her seat, crashing in the aisle. Much willpower was instituted within me to not burst out laughing. My lips looked like ~ all struggling to stay closed. Mean-spirited? Naw...she laughed too, right? Nyuk nyuk nyuk.
Weather is odd. Real odd. it was like 90 degrees a few days ago and all of a sudden it's 50 degrees. Mother Nature needs to make her mind up. Punk ass.
Happy Halloween! Ah yes, All Hallow's Eve, where for me, candy consumption has turned to alcholic consumption. (I honestly need to stop writing about all these delves into drunken stupors. Somehow this is gonna come back and bite me in the ass. I'm not a wino, honestly. I don't drink every weekend, and it's only once a week. Well, I guess I drank Thursday and Friday this week, for a birthday and Halloween. But I'm not an alcoholic. Honestly! Okay, I did start drinking at 2PM last Friday...SHADDAP!) Not eating much that day, a little under 600 calories, and drinking a lil before 8PM. I got peaced out. Personified shit-faced, I did. Went to a house party, then for some dumb reason, decided to wander out. The only thing that saved me from being lost? A bright, red beacon of hope, enticing me with warm rays of hospitality. A Jack-in-the-Box sign. So sue me. I'm so lucky...right when I randomly walked out, and called my roommate, Tony, he had just got into Davis from visiting home. So, I was given a ride home, then decided to bother as many people as I could in my super powered state. And, as usual, I woke up the next day at 7AM totally refreshed. Me and my odd mutant powers.
Chief Concern Of The Moment: Going to stores to get candy, because of post-Halloween prices. Ahhhh yea~~~~ You know it, too. Pounce now. | | |
| What Strength! But Don't Forget There Are Guys Like You All Over The World.
Marlins over the Yankees. YES. One storied franchise over another. Seriously, this was the baseball World Series nobody wanted. I mean, Cubs v. Red Sox? That would have been the best. But it would have also been the end of the world, as one of them would have to win. Either that or like 40 days and nights of rain delays, leading to a 909-inning game. Whatever. Marlins are still undefeated in post season series, something like 6-0. And this was one of the teams I wanted MLB to contract, since they had a crappy history, with winning only one series, and a firesale afterwards. Whatever.
Last Friday...drank from 2PM-2AM. Yup. It was like some kind of constant flow. I was supposed to start at 10AM too...bad communications...that's supposed to happen only after drinking. One of the drinking buds, Vic, got all butthurt after another, Danny, ripped a hole in his pants pocket, and left. Whatta jerk. Huhuhuh, he got butthurt after a guy caused a hole in his pants, huhuhuh. Sadly, I was never drunk, only buzzed at one point. My roommate's prof said consuming 4000 calories in one day is hard to do. Showed his ass wrong, no problem...seriously, I'm pretty sure I consumed massive amounts of calories.
Speaking of 4000 calorie days, I love me some whole chickens from Safeway/Albertsons/Etc. No utensils though. Just tear into that shit, caveman style. All they need for it is some sort of accompanying sound effect of a bird in desperation and like some kinda sauce that looks like blood. That'd be cool. Savage-like. GRAWWWWR.
I read this week. Actually read. For class, I mean. Whoa. My brain went into all sortsa downward spirals for me introducing a new stimulus. My apologies cranial buddy. Anyways, for all my efforts, my midterm was moved until two days later. The moral is: Why Bother?
And now, I still have more work to do. Ah, yes, procrastination. Essay + Midterm tomorrow. Let's rock. | | |
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