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StrangerAtHome
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Name: Ed
Country: United States
State: California
Birthday: 10/3/1983
Gender: Male
Interests: Theatre, Piano, Thinking
Expertise: Just In Time Production
Occupation: Student
Industry: Legal
Message: message me
Member Since:
2/3/2003
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| I turned a quarter-century old yesterday. I thought a lot about the past, but I have decided to let it go. That include ending this Xanga. I will blog again in the near future. However, with my school years behind me, a new chapter of my life has to begin. I need a symbolic action to push toward the future, and ending this blog feels appropriate. Thank you dear readers from all these years. Ed | | |
| I am back in Berkeley.
It feels appropriate that, I, after all that has happened, am preparing for the California bar exam where it all began.
Summer 2004, I made a haste decision to take the LSAT and study for it at the Boalt Hall library. I did not know what the fuck I wanted to do with my life.
Summer 2008, I have made a last-minute choice to going to take my Bar prep course in the very same building so I can get my license to practice law. I am pretty damn sure I want to be a lawyer.
Summer 2004, I lived with a then loving girlfriend, but it was just puppy love.
Summer 2008, I am living with a loving girlfriend, only now I think I have a slightly better idea of what love is all about.
Summer 2004, I drank a lot of white mochas to keep me up while studying.
Summer 2008, I am still drinking a lot of white mochas, only now it cost a lot more than it use to be (inflation, I officially hate you).
Things have changed. Places have changed. People around me have changed. I have changed. Best friends no longer live down the street from my south side apartment. It is not the big changes, but the summation of inifitnismal small changes over time that forces one to realize the passage of time.
Yet, I still eat at the Asian Ghetto. I still write on xanga when I should be studying. Ah, such is me. Such is life.
Beautiful memories, however, will always remain with me as I walk past these dirty, ghetto streets of Berkeley everyday this summer and reminisce about the good times that once belonged to you and me.
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| In case you are wondering about the title, in ancient Chinese poetry, the water flowing east is a imagery for the passge of time because all rivers in China flows east towards the Chinese Sea. I AM DONE WITH LAW SCHOOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Long sentimental entry to capture the moment --- nah, my brain is too tired now. Party UP! | | |
| Here I am, 8 days away from my final set of law school finals, I should be cramming really hard because failure is not an option. Yet, here I sit paralyzed by the thoughts of what dreams may come. If I were to write a recipe to the mix of feelings that I have right now, it would consist of one tablespoon each of trepediation, fears, relief, regrets, joy, happiness, confusion, amazement, despair and hope. My state of mind spells oxymoron on its forehead. I need to put away these feelings and just sprint. Wish me luck. | | |
| I am turning 24 in less than a month. All the sudden it hit me that I am no longer "just out of college". I feel old.
The fact that I am still in school has distorted my sense of time. However, reality of life is slapping my face like a face-slapping b*tch.
See, the first two years after college, you can keep saying you are "just out of college". College, for better or worse, was 3 years ago. THREE freaking years.
My bank account is still as empty as ever. My future is still a cloud. I need to grow up. Mortgage payments. Feeding my family. Idealism and dreams giving way to praticality and attainable goals.
God, I hate being old.
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