i stole this from a friend of a friend's site... he always posts these really deep blogs and i've been tempted for so long to steal one... i just read it, and i thought it'd be good if ppl saw this too because I agree with what C.S. Lewis describes in today's world too... and I think it sucks that so many ppl will turn towards divorce whenever they reach a hole in the ground. if you see this, I sincerely hope you don't mind.  ( I tried to source you too) I posted this two years ago when I first started this page, but it's a subject that has been on my mind lately so I thought I would post it again. It's a passage from "Mere Christianity" by C.S. Lewis. I think the person I marry has to share this same belief. "The idea that 'being in love' is the only reason for remaining married really leaves no room for marriage as a contract or promise at all. If love is the whole thing, then the promise can add nothing; and if it adds nothing, then it should not be made. The promise, made when I am in love and because I am in love, to be true to the beloved as long as I live, commits me to being true even if I cease to be in love. A promise must be about things that I can do, about actions: no one can promise to go on feeling in a certain way. He might as well promise never to have a headache or always to feel hungry. But what, it may be asked, is the use of keeping two people together if they are no longer in love? There are several sound, social reasons: to provide a home for their children, etc. But there is also another reason of which I am sure. What we call 'being in love' is a glorious state. But, as I said before, 'the most dangerous thing you can do is to take any one impulse of our own nature and set it up as the thing you ought to follow at all costs'. Being in love is a good thing, but it is not the best thing. There are many things below it, but there are also things above it. You cannot make it the basis of a whole life. It is a noble feeling, but it is still a feeling. Now, no feeling can be relied on to last in its full intensity, or even to last at all. Who could live in excitement for even five years? But, of course, ceasing to be 'in love' need not mean ceasing to love. Love in this second sense is not merely a feeling. It is a deep unity, mantained by the will and deliberately strengthened by habit. They can have this love for each other even at those moments when they do not like each other; as you love yourself even when you do not like yourself. They can retain this love even when each would easily, if they allowed themselves, be 'in love' with someone else. 'Being in love' first moved them to promise fidelity: this quieter love enables them to keep the promise. It is on this love that the engine of marriage is run: being in love was the explosion that started it. People get from books the idea that if you have married the right person you may expect to go on 'being in love' for ever. As a result, when they find they are not, they think this proves they have made a mistake and are entitled to a change - not realising that, when they have changed, the glamour will presently go out of the new love just as it went out of the old one." | 