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| I haven't been blogging. Lazy, tired, sleepy, stress, blank mind, routine life...
Random things...
Just back from 3 nights trip from KL. Working today... Don't feel like going to but still have to, to earn my living... If not, I have to depend on others to survive. I have been told by alot people, that in MSIA, even if you don't earn big money everyday, you still can survive with simple life. You may not have to spend daily expenses like you need in SG... Pay rent, pay bills, pay tax... You can grow your own veggie, own food outside your own home. You can even own your own car, without worrying too much bills to pay... Of cos there are cons... you get bored. There is nothing much u can do around there. Not like in SG, 99% sure safe to travel at night, go out at night, walk in quiet path at night.
When I got home... is that home? Seems my family now consists of only 3 members. My father, mother and brother... I am more like a outside at my own home. I do not know what is happening daily of their life, nor do they care what or where I am. Why has it become like this? I have no clue... I admit I am a private person. As long as I am comfortable to share, I will. My home now is like a place I rent. Work, home, bath, go own room. Repeat daily.
It is tiring to be giving in and giving in and get results back. I don't mind giving in, but is it worth it? It is saddening and tiring to be kept giving in and all I get back is selfish response. I am not totally a selfless. I do not always 100% willing to be the only one giving in. Sometimes I give in because situations needed. I expect something in return and same type of giving in. I don't mean everytime. At least out of 10 times, u try giving in once or twice. I can't be the selfless person all the time. I am not that good. I have my own selfish thinking. I have my own desires. I have my own motives. Who doesn't? I try my best to keep promise to my words. | | |
| Below are the dialogue of what I told my friend on msn... same stories I had been repeating to people I am close to in the company.. as the title above.. I am really getting tired of such rubbish..
Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: today i kenna got angry at the office again
9:34:24 PM |-).:이본.: y what happened
9:34:27 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: my production manager passed message, or gentle warning to my supervisor to me
9:34:42 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: i got complain that I last few months very free
9:34:45 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: nothing to do at work
9:35:08 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: then always alot ppl come find me at work, personal or work related watever
9:36:27 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: ask me to watch my back... cos the informations he received are from sales ppl and MY PRODUCTION SUPERVISOR, not my DI supervisor lah, that I am very free at work, unlike other ppl so busy.
9:37:14 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: my production supervisor is the one who log in job sheet no. that goes to DI department (ppl like me do artwork) and log out the job when it is done.
9:37:35 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: She should know when she logged out, i busy or not...
9:37:49 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: cos we got signed each time we do a job.
9:38:34 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: Maybe I could say.. I alot of times, nv had a jobsheet when i do certain jobs, cos sales always waited till job done, printed, out long ago liao, then open jobsheet
9:38:55 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: only what i handle, the brands, are messy, troublesome, no jobsheets and urgent most
9:39:35 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: what I am angry most is i the one who log in log out jobs, can said to my manager I AM FREE FOR THE PAST BLOODY FEW MONTHS.
9:41:00 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: and from what my DI supervisor said, maybe she only meant it in a leisure chit chat with my manager... but u say lah, she worked in the company so many years, and she is an adult who has 2 grown up kids... 40plus liao.. doesn't she knw what she should said and wat shouldn't? and the person she told this to is my direct manager
9:41:13 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: those words can be as a chithcat topic ah
9:41:19 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: fucking woman
9:42:09 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: what she meant as harmless doesn't mean the person heard it is treating it as harmless
9:42:15 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: kns..
9:42:22 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: I was so bloody angry
9:43:01 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: my DI supervisor said it is not a big deal, just that my manager wants me to keep a lookout abt what ppl think of my work performance
9:43:15 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: and dun let ppl think i am free
9:43:24 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: bloody hell did I?
9:43:34 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: I am not human ah, i cannot take a breathe ah
9:43:48 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: i must from 9am to 6pm sit there always do do do, and do
9:44:05 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: if I dun eat lunch, always work OT till midnight
9:44:08 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: like that is busy ah
9:44:32 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: I stay quiet, dun mix alot ard, say me loner, shouldn't do taht
9:44:54 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: when i got used to the environment, i don't shy away liao, now said i free
9:45:10 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: the sales ppl always the liar so i dun care abt what they said
9:45:31 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: cos big boss favors sales ppl more.. all these years the company is like that... so i dun care
9:46:13 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: but the PRODUCTION SUPERVISOR who handles our incoming jobs in to DI and logs out the jobs from the production, said such irresponsible things
9:46:20 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: bloody angry...
9:47:11 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: i told my DI supervisor.. always such kind of things, goes meeting with me... to me it is not an encouragement to make worker to improve
9:47:17 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: it is demoralising me
9:47:34 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: maybe other ppl will try to keep prove they are not like that and stay on
9:47:47 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: my character, it will only push me further away, and wanting to quit
9:48:01 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: I also said to my supervisor in a gentle way
9:48:09 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: dun try to penalise me using such things
9:48:27 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: cos in the end, i will quit
9:48:50 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: i already cant stand such nonsense liao
9:50:37 PM |-).:이본.: wah u like that tell your supervisor ah
9:50:46 PM |-).:이본.: is this supervisor fren fren with u?
9:50:50 PM |-).:이본.: or 2 headed one
9:50:54 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: used to be
9:51:05 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: but after i par tor with wg
9:51:23 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: i find her starting to be prejudice with me
9:51:34 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: put judgement on me b4 understanding
9:52:00 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: and worse ever since i got into the arguement with my manager last time..
9:52:04 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: did i tell u that?
9:52:14 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: she didn't stand up for me
9:52:27 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: i don't mix with her too much liao
9:52:54 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: i tell her in a way, not what i am typing here
9:54:49 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: i just tell her.. personally, dun u tink our manager focus too much on what I am doing, picking needles in the bones? she said yesh lah, maybe cos i am still young, must tied in tighter rein, if not my wings hard liao, will fly away.
9:56:45 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: then i tell her, telling me such things to remind me to him maybe not big deal, but to doubt my working attitude and my performance.. with such gossip, is not encouraging me.. and I heard these gossips things so many times, and always after such here here ppl said this ppl said that, and so lucky u saw it like what u heard just one time, he asked supervisor to come talk to me.. is making me feeling working in here is more and more depressing
9:57:32 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: i also asked her.. does she finds these a kind of way to encourage a worker? I don't feel so, it is just making me want to leave
10:01:43 PM |-).:이본.: then wat she said
10:02:35 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: she kept emphasising dun treat it as a big deal... just be aware of what people are saying to my manager and put up a show infront of him...
10:03:49 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: she knows i hate being hypocrite.. but she asked me try not to think it that way, anywhere we worked, we have to put up a show, to let others bored with gossiping because there is nothing new to...
10:06:10 PM |-).:이본.:ya work anywhere also have to act abit one
10:06:17 PM |-).:이본.:in order to survive
10:09:23 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: i knw
10:09:38 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: but last few months i was free, nothing to do?
10:09:50 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: then what i have been so busy with last few months
10:10:06 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: those work i did.. all is i imagine one?
10:10:35 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: what i angry is, one the Production supervisor senseless words
10:10:57 PM Spilling Gossips.. want me to quit is it?!?!?!?!: 2nd is... what was accused of me, is false
Bloody hell!
*&%%#!!@# | | |
| There is a displeasure issue between my boy and my colleague yesterday. From what I known, both are in fault. One doesn't know how to explain clearly to avoid misunderstanding. One doesn't understand the situation she is in. Then this morning, I tried to figure how her problem with her iphone and overheard she mentioned to my other colleague about getting a new PC. This male colleague owns a iPhone too. So therefore I asked him if he able to use his iPhone to connect to the mac with any problem anot? Instead of answering me, he replied me he doesn't dare to download, cos my boy said cannot download anything personal that is not related to work. What makes me more pissed off is, he even asked me back who hasn't download personal stuff on office mac or PC before? My boy didn't meh? Said my boy is stubborn on his points. Why do u need to say that? It is true almost everyone does. I did too, folder icons at most, the rest is just surfing website. I know how to control myself and I know what kind of harm it will does to my work station if I download anything may harm and interferes with my work. Basically, I know how to maintain my working mac. What I feel my boy is correct in a way, she used another colleague's mac to try her iPhone with and it caused the other male colleague's mac internet down... email can't be read... internet can't connect... there is always an error message pop up. She can't fix it, the owner of the mac can't fix it. So who fix it? My boy! Yes, he is the IT man in the company. But is it because of work, the mac is spoiled? No because she tried to do personal stuff, not on her own working mac, but others and doesn't know how to fix the problem in that mac. I didn't see she knows or care about whether the other colleague's mac got problem. I don't even think she knows!
What I am angry about is, don't they understand that because of my boy, they able to access to internet now? From what I know, they only have one mac to access internet last time. My department don't have the right to have internet access... My boy proposed and fights for them to get it. My boy closed one eyes when we surf internet on working time.. cos it doesn't need to be so tight rule if they knows how to discipline themselves. My boy is in wrong cos he doesn't know how to express himself clearly to avoid misunderstanding. She is in wrong cos she doesn't see she is in wrong in the 1st place. The male colleague who said that is in wrong because he is siding without knowing the whole truth and situation.. only with what he heard yesterday. I am in wrong because I too close to all of them, and I interfere and caused myself to be so pissed!!
I AM SO BLOODY PISSED! | | |
| 从生日判断你是什么脾气
1， 帝雉 1/15~2/14出生
条理清晰、见解力强、诚实而坚毅型的人。虽然拥有老实又温和的外表，内心却隐藏着像梅花一般的坚强个性。重视自我实践、有效率地达成目标，你总希望能不断进步以完成更高的理想。你有向上的野心，更会不惜花费时间、金钱，力求完成。
2， 鹰 2/15~3/14出生
早熟善感，富有个性与创意，独特的思维模式让你显得神秘与吸引力。文艺方面具有相当的天份，希望在旅游中找寻人生的真谛与灵魂的意义，流动式的生存方式，也是你向往且擅长的，因此如果硬要把自已绑在一个固定的范围之内，你可能会感到有挫折感，「留在固定模式的框框」里，会埋没了你的才能！
3， 白鸽 3/15~4/14出生
心地善良总是把温暖欢乐带给别人，具有从事公益活动的精神。常常不顾自己，尽力完成别人的托付，要小心被心怀不轨的人利用。不过你却不会因此改变性格，但你却会升华这些教训，变得越来越坚强！
4， 蜂鸟 4/15~5/14出生
个性主观且执着，却是性情中人！不会沉溺于不切实际的空想当中，专心一志达成目标。能适时展现出勇敢果断的一面，口才佳，具谋略且反应快的你，有与生俱来的机智和过人的逻辑力，这样的你不论成为领导人物，还是人气活跃的角色，都会备受注目与拥戴。
5， 画眉鸟 5/14~6/14出生
天生具有神秘感与灵巧的变化性，但时常容易处于矛盾之中。隐藏着两种极端的个性，温柔与强势、可爱与妒嫉、浪费与小气，属于纤细敏感体质。在微笑背后，也有想象不到的超现实的另一面。你适合担任辅臣或谋臣，较能发挥力量。
6， 九官鸟 6/15~7/16出生
具好奇心，聪明且幽默风趣的人。想法一直在改变，虽然辩才无碍，但常不小心把重要的事说溜了嘴。对于耍宝、搞气氛方面也很擅长，人际关系手腕圆滑，如果能不把聪明表现得太过火的话，就能成为人气极旺的阳光人物喔！
7， 文鸟 7/17~8/16出生
容易觉得寂寞，很容易被感动，也很乐意感动别人。虽然很会照顾人，内心却有天真的一面，像彼得潘，是个长不大的顽皮小孩，不过，有时却令人意外地会展现出成熟的一面。
8， 孔雀 8/17~9/16出生
个性鲜明，超喜欢追求流行，永远在找寻自已能引人注目的方式。总是活在想象的世界里。拥有号召人群的能力，可以让大家都聚精会神听你说话；缺点是容易光说不练，若能培养行动力，就有本事让人都愿意跟随你。
9， 七色鸟 9/17~10/16出生
理智型的人，很懂得做事的方法，有时不免对他人的要求也高，如果过于苛求，最后可能会走向孤独，或许是因为带有悲观的性格，所以，你也会常常因为害怕失去，连可以得到的也将之拒绝的情形发生。
10，乌鸦 10/17~11/16出生
不笑的时候，显得冷酷与淡漠，其实内心隐藏热情，具长辈缘，也会得同辈与晚辈的喜爱与拥戴。不过，因为完美主义的倾向，而考虑太多难以下决定。对于讨厌的人，会毫不保留地加以唾弃，讨厌不公平的事情发生。
11，金丝雀 11/17~12/14出生
性情中人，容易冲动而行。不过正因为这股隐藏在内心的热诚，让你具有使不可能变成为可能的力量。遇到困难也会超越原本能力。你奉行「一次不忠百次不用」，不会背叛人，也决不原谅背叛的人。
12，鹦鹉 12/15~1/14出生
自由奔放的乐天派，但因为容易固执的结果，反而导致一些机会与你擦身而过。虽然拥有天份与才气，却过于沉溺在自我傲气中；个性反复无常、兴趣多，也很懂得玩乐，也会有外人意想不到的认真态度！因此要修正一下自己的毛或优柔寡断的个性，才会好相处。 | | |
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The year I was in design school and met a whole bunch of friends that I never get when I am in my school days... which I can still count on till now. And also I left him.
I just answered this Featured Question; you can answer it too!
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