yeah, I never post here anymore. livejournal has stollen me. Sorry, kiddos. Maybe I'll post every now and then cause fewer people I actually know read this, but for now, here's a link to my livejournal. And it's not like xanga, so anyone and everyone can comment! (just leave your name, please)

The wonderful world of livejournal (and drama)

Some people are so mature. Seriously, if you obviously like someone else better just say it, I have no problem with that. I'd much rather hear that then "I like you too but..." cut the but. I can deal just fine, better actually. I don't like being led on. No one does, and you were leading me on.

So we might as well just move on.

I can't believe some morons think this is a choice. Can I beat them up?

FUCK YOU FOR THINKING YOU KNOW WHAT IT'S LIKE TO BE ME, AMERICA.

Fuck you, people of this US of A who think  lifestyle is fine and dandy, but being equal is bad. FUCK OFF.

If marriage were for procreation, why are sterile people allowed to marry? And why are women allowed to remarry after menopause? And why can heterosexuals get married and not have kids. RIGHT, I THOUGHT SO. "but that's how it's been for thousands of years! Do you want to challenge that?" No shit, dumbass, they had slavery for thousands of years before the emancipation proclamation...and I don't see you protesting that. Just say you're a pigheaded bastard, at least you're not a hypocrite that way.

SO FUCK OFF.

I'm still alive.

Burning.....burning.....

....should do homework.
                                 (the devil)

Fall in love?
            (okay....)                    (...though I should stay out of trouble)

...........But....(so tantalizing)

Today was wonderful. So was yesterday. My brain is full up on quantum physics theorizing and the theoretical differences between math, grammar, and physical science. I think I want to proffessionally talk. That'd be I philosopher or psychiotrist or something, but I'm not digging that. I love talking. I love talking about things I know and don't know and things I want to figure out. It baffles me how people can not like it, or be annoyed if people try to educate themselves outside of school? Since when is learning a bad thing you shouldn't aspire to do on your own? I learn in spite of school. I think it's silly to stay stupid despite it. ...but that was a random tangent.

I love the painters Courbet, Corot, and Manet. I'm not a fan of impressionism. Why? Because I feel like it captrues one aspect of a moment and not its layers. It doesn't capture the intrinsic beauty I want to see. As art, it's amazing, it just doesn't appeal to me. I'm also really respecting modern art after today. Suddenly I've come to the realization that making an aesthetically pleasing arrangement of colors or objects is enough to be art.  Realism takes talent, and I feel that it is necessary for all areas of art, just like you need basic addition for all math, but surrealism and abstractions take this crazy imagination and understanding of colors that baffles me. I don't have the aesthetic skill Polock had. And, I must add, he is amazing. I've also come to the realization that I don't like blue. I mean the type of cheary light blue that looks horrible on me. I just have some strange aversion to it. I like Picasso's "Guitarist" blue, but not Cezanne blue, if you know what I mean. On the other hand, I love all reds and pinks. they amaze me. Warhol's camoflaged self-portrait in red and pink is amazing! It has such appeal, because I love those colors. I never understood colors well...but now it's kind of like food, and light blue is a raw onion (ugh), while red is a pomegarante (mmmmm).

I'm off for the long weekend. Until Sunday, or whenever I feel like updating.

Happy Halloween!!

Sorry for the hiatus, but nothing has been going on my life at all, except that suddenly I'm talking to  a lot of people I haven't talked to recently. It's a very nice turn of events.

I'm Janis Joplin today, and I feel damned ratty, like mold should be finding a home in my hair. "Freedom's just another word for nothing left to lose!" I love songs like a madness. Oh man, I'm loving life and there's really nothing at all going on. It's just here, but why not love it? Being this woman, I mean how could she throw so much away? How could she just shove it off? I mean, I'm not her for any deep reasons, it's cause I have the hair and I already wanted to be a hippie, but man, how can anyone throw it away? It's so damned precious. ahh, fuck, I think I'll go dig my life somewhere nearby. Go do something, but first I have to get out of school. Mmmmmm free candy. I think I'm going to say hi. I love today cause everyone's walking around and talking to strangers like it used to be. Everyone's in a mad funk. Everyone's happy and it's so great. It's like Christmas, except with some peace in it. How ironic.