因為大家都看yahoo blog，所以就多加一個家了。
今天的touring很有意義。我們去了甘迺迪中心，是一間殘障加智障人士的學校，完show後有一個女孩認真地跟我說我做得好，演出時，我的眼淚流下來的時候，她的眼淚也跟著流。我問她喜不喜歡戲劇? 她說喜歡。喜不喜歡演戲? 不。為什麼? 怕醜。我看到她其實不喜歡被看，覺得自己不好看。我給了她一個擁抱，好好鼓勵她一下。離開時，我想其實她可以試試做編劇...我告訴了她的老師了~

昨晚曙曦和Julia跟我談了很久，就在上課的地方談到凌晨1點40分...我的眼淚就不斷流，這段日子覺得好像怎麼努力也沒有用。對，我該看得遠一點... 尋找自己的路，繼續自我磨練，有一天或許可以「創」。演員，不一定是被動的...成功的演員不是這樣決定的...謝謝他們。他們是真的愛藝術和明白藝術的。比起他們，我只是無知又自卑的演員，不是藝術家。他們說我們可愛(就是因為我們不覺得自己叻....唔...)，他們其實也很可愛，就是大家的不完美才演得可愛，人真是傻-傻人。
想到畢業到現在，慢慢的遇到更多性情、看法類似的前輩，有他們相知已感幸福。不過總的來說，都是傻的。哈。

my new blog: http://hk.myblog.yahoo.com/i_am_er/article?new=1&mid=3

recently, i always hear ppl told me,'u'r really positive.', then they laughed. cos they think i'm so ar Q spirit. ah! but i really think that wor. not for encouraging myself or tell a lie to comfort myself... then ...maybe... i'm really positive! haha. and i just discover that, i really can bear a lot~but i seldom say i'm painful...cos i find something to make myself happy. a clown?! maybe.

these two days, the students in the touring performance is damn bad! just totally not respect us! today, when my partner asked wht my character wanna do in the future... a student said,'prostitute'! in fact, i had opened the IGNORE RUDE mode in the early stage. i cant hear this during performance. i just focused on those who're really watching... but at the end, my partner reminded them this point and teached them a lesson. then i know. i'm shocked and cant speak. my tears are coming. but i still smiled. if it's the first time i met, i will feel so angry like my partners (like the last school, even the teachers didnt respect us as well! i'm fucking angry). but this time, i'm naked b4 them. just like ready to be raped without struggle. yes, i can stand for even more worse situation. i'm cheap but i still do sth good for u! u know?! but i really thx for them. it's a good lesson. the harder the stiuation, the better i will do to show u and the more i try to love MY audience. i'll use my real heart to draw ur sight. as Elton said, 'use acting（戲）to hold them'. thx for the HARSH audience. i learn a lot. and i just need to perform once there, but the teachers hv to face them ev' day. i'm only the little potato. thx Fattung's fire today. it's my first time to see his anger.

remember? in old Chinese society, actress is at the lowest ninth rank! yes... the cheapest...like melodrama in France. like ev' where...

Elton come to watch the touring today!!! he's soooooo good! give us useful comment~ and again, i can hv his lesson. i can understand my partner more after his words. i think Elton and i are the same type of person. i like he said, '傲骨', yes, we need to teach the audience. can't just please them. i think not many director will come to watch the touring after opening! he's soooo good to his job and to us. and he said, '有麝自然香', damn agree. and ar ching told him i think he's so good and i love him! i was embarassed! for sure, that love is not the love between lovers. but really! i really like him!  good teacher and director. and i think! ar ching just use my words to say her mind as well. she also thinks the same! hahahahahahahaha! bless him with all my heart, cos i think he deserves. and be greedy, i hope i can act with him one day. that will be fun! i'm sure!!!!!

i'm so lucky to involve. u know, THIS IS DRAMA! not only the comedy!!! and now, i hv direction again to focus on. as a touring, tragedy is a very difficult task. it's difficult to let the students go together, esp the first half is the comedy part! i just read Carol's blog. it moves me. so i know y she cares this touring so much. sorry to say again=i'm just too lucky to involve in the company that's full of theatre lovers!

at the end, the direction is--use my whole heart. to make it grow further.

today's touring performance, i think i can feel the "CHARACTER"... a bit strange. but, i feel she's living. she's pulling me thru'. i cant explain. i still can hv another eye to look at myself. she laugh and she cry that i cant hesitate... maybe the start point is... i use the students there...just think they're my dead classmates... i felt so sorry for them... then i felt LOVE... ha. just sudden. thx for MUSE!

at last, thx for the audience today. the quality of audience is the crucial point of the show, esp for the small venue.and by the way, i feel so comfortable to act in Putonghua. that's wht i wanna learn! when compare to my show case, i improve a lot!!! that's already enough. in fact, i give hope near the graduation: wanna do touring and use Putonghua to act one day~ thx! my wishes are seldom granted... already... enough.