| It's time to grow up, darling.
Yes. I'm talking about myself. I've been such a baby all these while. It's time i should learn to be stronger. I should be relying on myself instead of others. I should be counting on myself for support. I should be stop thinking of the impossible. I ought to be more independent. I ought to be less demanding. I ought to be much stronger than i ever was.
Somehow, no one can ever be there for me always. I thought u would always be around when i needed you but i was wrong. You couldn't afford the time, you couldn't commit yourself. But all i wanted was someone to talk to. I wanted you to share happenings with.
As time passes, our conversations get shorter and we get busier. Perhaps one day we will no longer see the need to talk. Should i even be feeling this way? I have never liked to chat on the phone but i really just wanted someone to pour my thoughts out to.
I guess i should just keep my thoughts to myself and bring them to bed with me. |
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| it seems that things are improving. i don't really know how to feel. i'm happy yet nostalgiC. well it's time for bed! good nite sweetie |
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| well. i have finally gotten it off my chest. gone on to confide it in someone. ha ha. feels good. maybe i'm really learning to let go. i'm beginning to accept things the way they are. should i be glad? perhaps. i miss you.
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| I haven't gone out since the start of the hols. Been cooping myself up at home. I don't know what's wrong but lazing at home seemed more appealing.
The hols are over, it's back to school again. I'm not glad.
Loneliness engulfs me. Where's everyone when i need them? Maybe it's my problem. I'm afraid to ask.
Been spending alot of time with my mom. That's the only thing that's been keeping my spirits up.
But i'll still be needing sleeping pills to put me to bed. |
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| I'M tired.. it has been ages since i last got a good sleep. 24 hrs never seem to be enough to satisfy me. I need more time, more sleep, more fun & more money. HAHAH. I think i'm getting a little cynical.
I really should just shut off this stupid com and crawl into bed for some sleep but i'm waiting for dear kelly to call.  Ok.. so i'm desperate to talk to her. Big deal. Call me asap darling!
I've never really been entirely happy these days. It's that bugging feeling that sets me in a laughless mood. Someone tell me what to do. Talk to me.
Anyway.. was looking thru' some pics and came across this which i like alot. So here it is!
Say good nite. I'm heading off to bed. |
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