Tonight it’s very clear and we’re both lying here

There’s so many things I wanna say

I will always love you, I will never leave you alone

Sometimes I just forget, say things I might regret

It breaks my heart to see you crying

I don’t wanna loose you, I could never make it alone

haih... actually, i'm really really really lazy having to update this page again... but then today is toooo good to be not updated here. spent the whole day with michelle at MV.  it was great and i've exceeded my total money spent -- 170 bucks approximately.  okay, i noe that's not much for an average teen, but for me, it's quite alot.  but it's worth it anyway

haha, let's see, what else, went to mph and did nothing there, met paige and jon who were evidently very much attached to the book store and never wanted to leave... so we had no choice but to leave those 2 there and went for lunch at a jap restaurant.  and they had the kneeling cushion and it was the first time Mich had that experience of sitting on the floor -- well, not exactly, but practically.

then went to shop for mich's couz's present (ok, 'banging truck") and we came across these keyboards which she started to play and it was beautiful. i dunno why but i kinda like hearing and watching her fingers dancing on the keys. and when it's my time to play i got so clumsy that my fingers stumble all over each other.  haha, guess coz i'm playing in the public my fingers aren't used to it.

ok, then, watched something's gotta give and i had mich leaning on my shoulders almost all the time throughout the movie.  haha, this is getting better and better. after that, went for a little shopping and went for dinner.  and though i dun like it, she insists on paying for dinner coz i've been paying for everything, so i ordered the simplest meal i can manage and, ya, that's about it...

haih... jealousy. why do people feel jealous? will it be better if there is no such thing in the world? and too bad i feel jealous ever so often. haha, i'd probably sound more like a sissy. but don't guys get jealous? i mean when there's this cool guy around your gal and u being the "not-so-cool" kinda person... haih, i oso dunno how to say.

sometime's i just feel that i'm not up to it. as if i'm not good enuff for mich or like, there may be someone else out there that's more suitable. probably i wasn't being caring enough? i didn't call her on monday, not even an sms. am i being very bad? i dun really noe coz i'm really really kinda inexperience in this (ya, i hate to admit it, but, oh well)

what she told me today about what eugene said was kinda bothering me and as i played my keyboard, i had this thoughts lingering in my head and i got all the notes wrong. urgh... it's soooo stupid.

but then, after speaking to her just a few moments ago in the phone (again, and yes, aud, it's our hse phone) i felt much better. i felt that being honest to each other is really really important. jeff and jeannie is a vv good example.  they weren't honest to each other and jeff will always tell me his problems with jean and jean will always tell her problems to kwai yee and what started as a two-people problem became a "quadruple" problem.

so... that's about it i guess. pouring everything out feels soo much better

wow! it's been some time since i last updated my journal. guess i'm just being lazy :P haha, actually i thought of updating it during the weekends but i spent too much time on the phone with michelle.  haha, my phone bill's gonna kill me for this month.  seriously, i've never spoken for more than ten minutes previously.  but i broke the record high time.  around one hr with michelle for three times.  woopsy-do!!!  so much for being not "phone-ey"

ok, so all the tests're finished. today's bio was not bad.  not too difficult, nothing i can't handle i guess.  oh, and today i got to drive to college and back. it's really boring.  some more i have to drive when i am most tired - early in the morning and right after class.  this is the time when i'm suppose to snooze in the bus...