Currently Listening If You Say Go see related

sinful woman + jesus

now one of the pharisees invited jesus to have dinner with him, so he went to the pharisees house and reclined at the table.  when a woman who had lead a sinful life in that town learned that jesus was eating at the pharisee's house, she brought an alabaster jar of perfume, and as she stood behind him at his feet weeping, she began to wet his feet with her tears. then she wiped them with her hair, kissed them and poured perfume on them.

luke 7:36-38

what would you do if you heard that jesus was coming to your city?

go with your gut

since living in downtown minneapolis during my college years (all six of them) i have longed to return to the urban environment.  i remember walking everywhere or using public transport, overhearing conversations outside of my window while people waited for the bus to come, and being in a place that doesn't shut down.  but you know how memories generally are: much better (or worse) than they actually were.  so i had some reservations about living in a city and questions on how to raise two kids in a small space that, again, never shuts down.  i've heard about how bad the urban public schools are with their lack of funding, scary drunkards or homeless people harassing you on the sidewalks, traffic, etc.  i could see the fear in people eyes as we told them what we were thinking about doing.  but let me tell you, i love our new apartment and my new community.  this is where we are meant to be and the people we are to be around. 

i was worried about how the kids would sleep together in the same room but they've adjusted wonderfully and haven't even awakened in the middle of the night to come and get us.  i wondered how we would continue recording and writing music in an apartment but as i write this paul is doing exactly that right now.

our complex is on a fairly quiet tree-lined street on the very edge of the downtown district.  there are students, young professionals, and older retired people who live on my floor.  this morning another family and ours walked up a few blocks to the farmer's market, bought some fresh produce and lunch, and then had some coffee before the kids were ready to go back "to the new house". 

a long time ago, my gut was telling me that we were made for a progressive city and were meant to work with young adults.  it's been quite a process to get to this place, and i am grateful for it, but in looking back and thinking about the future i have only one thought: go with my gut, or in spiritual terms, follow the still, small voice of the holy spirit. 

i see how fear and doubt and obsession with control keeps us fenced in an area that becomes all too familiar and comfortable.  the voice of fear from those around us accented by our news and entertainment media, doubt that as a believer we really hear the voice of god, and the need to know the next step (and the one after that and the one after that) lulls us. 

for me, being in the city is like a shot of caffeine.  i'm awake and aware.  i'm inspired.  it's bold and not afraid to be in your face.  it's invigorating.  it's a place of constant motion - where i am challenged to carry the peace of christ with me at all times, so that even if there is chaos around me, i have a stillness and space within that i can invite others' to.  it's a place that desperately needs to be loved - where needs are immediate and not always hidden by outward appearances.

as i write this i find myself with nothing to prove, but a desire to be transformed - to love more deeply and deliberately. 

as i begin to connect with my inner thoughts, i am once again reminded of my close quarters as the kiddos use the christmas tree box as a slide.  i think it's time to join them (and woody and jessi).

later.

wow.  i can't believe it's been a month since my last post.  yikes.

if you haven't heard yet, we are finally moving downtown!!  woohooo!!  our new place is close to everything - we will be true urbanites.  i am looking forward to figuring out the public transportation and walking to the farmer's market every saturday morning.  i can already taste the fresh fruit and veggies.  AND the gorgeous flower bouquets will look great in our new place.

we'll be in a 2bd/2ba apartment and i'm still trying to figure out how to put two kids under age five to bed in the same room.  if anyone has any tips i am ready to listen!

i mentioned public transport earlier...

i destroyed my jetta today.  put water in the place where oil goes.  yep.  big mistake.  it'll make a great story/illustration some day.  paul extended immense mercy and grace in my direction.  =)  the good news is that we no longer need tandem parking spots downtown.

Currently Reading God of the Possible: A Biblical Introduction to the Open View of God By Gregory A. Boyd see related

uptown girl

i'm sitting at "the beat" in uptown in minneapolis finishing up the french press i ordered about three hours ago.  my brother and his wife are at a meeting and i am surfing/waiting until they return.

i really miss being in portland.  i miss the kids, paul, my friends.  distance makes the heart grow fonder, for sure.  i realize how much i've come to love and appreciate all that i have - not much tangibly, but incredibly rich in friendships and relationships.

i have been thinking today about how we, as humans, need companionship, but because of our upbringing, hurts, or simply societal influences, we will exchange the rewards of deep relationship for things.  (seemingly lower risk.)  i have seen and experienced a poverty in love and friendship while maintaining measurable wealth.  it's a lonely place. 

on a side note, i've written a few more songs.  hopefully recording will take place in july and new songs will be available via itunes this summer!  woohoo!

democrats, rev. wright, i know you're already bored

this is more for me than for you.  so if anyone actually makes it through this, thank you.

i watch/read/discuss politics on a fairly regular basis.  as mccain continues to do what he does with little coverage (for good or for bad), i am annoyed with the rev. wright story taking up all the election news headlines.  so i have a couple random thoughts about this.  (maybe mixed in with some ranting.)

1 - anyone else notice how the media plays into fear? i especially hate it when you get a 10 sec intro to the local news headline that says something like, "babies are dying every year from a common household product.  are you in danger of killing your child?  watch news 6 at 10!"  so five hours later you can get the information on the incredibly dangerous child killing item in your home.  if this product is so dangerous and threatening, why wait to tell me?  oh, i know, you want me to watch your news tonight.  no more - i'm not getting sucked in to those methods.  my example seems small, but it contributes to an overall method of television media to keep our eyes glued to their stations.  from threatening household items to severe weather to feeding our own prejudices - media often plays into our fears. 

2 - i also see how cable news, in their attempt to keep viewers, brings polarizing individuals to spout their opinions.  the result is the perception, that as a nation, we are deeply split and irreconcilable.  i believe this is one reason that the rev. wright clips and conversation continues.  it drives me crazy.  anyone ever watch that show "30 days" where the guy who ate mcdonalds for a month (morgan spurlock, "supersize me") had people live with or change places with people with opposing views for 30 days.  i remember one where a pro-choice woman went to live and work in a pro-life house for women.  the end result?  not fighting or anger, but mutual realization that they fundamentally wanted the same thing (healthy, informed women) and that the opposite sides were filled with real people (not just faceless enemies trying to destroy each others' values or rights).  the lesson? we are not so far away from each other.

3 - anyone remember the issues?  how about we get back to those?  i disagree with pat buchanan who thinks that the rev. wright story is weighing heavily on all voters.  i guess i can only speak for myself and the perspective from where i sit.  but here's a little break down of why i want to move on. 

growing up in a religious movement that was shaken by the fall of it's leaders put me as a young leader (in the faith profession) in the shadow of men who failed.  it's been a decade of working through hypocricy, forgiveness, and recognition that if we'd stop judging, we'd stop being judged.  so how about we stop?  how many people have to weigh in?  also, i am surrounded by young adults/voters who haven't had to deal with all that crap and have a positive, idealistic worldview.  they actually believe that they can make a difference and are ready to talk issues.  by their very nature, they refuse to be defined by anyone (true or not) and reject the idea, for example, that rev. wright defines obama in any way.  so, this story doesn't impact them as i see it affecting boomers.  which, btw, seems to be the make-up of most news organizations - white boomers.  just a note.

anyhow, can we move on?  next story please.