I am having such a bad day its not even funny... not the littlest bit funny....
I slept at 6am.....
I had a horrible dream this morning... I had never dreamt of something like this before in my life. I actually dreamt of the end of the world.
The dream started where my parents bought a new house and I had a new room. From my room window I could watch the sun from midday to sunset. My clock at home crys the azan (prayer calling) every time its time to pray and so, as midday came for Zuhur, the sun was clearly visible from my room.
Suddenly though everything went weird. The sun moved in a speed only seen in movies where they fasten the speed of the camera. From being high up in the sky, in sank into the horizon in a matter of seconds.
I realised something was wrong and I immediately started saying every prayer I know. And I knew it was the end. All I could think of was I hope that my sins can be forgiven...
And when it became really dark, a spectacular lightning hit the horizon and everything around me started to crumble. I was standing on a prayer mat, looking down around me where everything had disolved and I could see the sparks of larva from the pits of the earth...
I could tell you the feeling was absolutely horrible.... I was terrified....
I can tell you that this imageries are not at all what Islam nor Christianity explains how the world would end. I kinda feel that a lot of the images were influenced by the whole lot of TV I watch... but Oh God....I have never felt so terrified...
All I could think of was... please take me out of this dream...
My phone chimed next to me indicating an sms and I was so thankful I woke up from that dream. BUT I was so terrified that my whole body was frozen. I could not move.... It took me almost a whole minute to be able to move again... I looked at the time it was 10.16am....
When I finally answered the sms... all I could think of was perhaps I should start changing myself for the better... be a better person...
No drastic changes... cos I know that would not last...but small and steady changes....
When I slept at 6am, I was supposed to take only a ten minute nap to wake up and continue doing audit assignment. But I overslept and now... my part is still not done and Ping is depending on it to start her part...
I think this is my punishment for procrastinating and doing last minute work.
I have been grumpy the whole day. And despite trying to explain to my parents that I need to do assignment... I was sent out to do errands that could easily be done tomorrow or any other time... they weren't that urgent to be honest... but nooooooooo they want it done today....
arrrrrrggggghhhhhhhhh
I am sooooo pissed and upset and bad tempered at the moment that I'm actually hoping that I would get into an accident or something... that way... I could stop everything for a while... what kind of a sick thought is that.... but yeah... I guess I'm desparate...
errrrrrrghhhhhh and yeah... errrrrrrrggggggggghhhhhhhhh
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