I surrender!

Due to a number of things going on right now that will be long-term, I am going out of the blog business. Thanks to all of you who stopped by and got an occasional laugh out of it.

Hello, yes I'm back. But I'm very cranky today. I'm a little stressed and I don't feel good. However, I will offer this brief editorial to keep up the appearance of being a good little blogger. Thanks to Leslie for the idea.

The Booda bone. Cleans your dogs' teeth while insulting an entire religion and its followers. I didn't think anything of it before, either. But as my friend pointed out , you would never find something in another country named "Christ" with a Y. Therefore, to appease insulted Buddhists and others, I give you Kryst Krispies. They talk to you when you add milk (or the blood of the son of God) and fills your stomach as well as your soul. Kryst Krispies. Start your day right.

Gone Friday and Monday

I will be gone Friday and Monday working my ass off. If I can pry myself away from my new flame this weekend, I may post something, but no guarantees. If you want to read about America's Worst Mother ™, you can do so over a TBogg. I'm sure he'll be covering it as usual. World O Crap and Jesus General are great places to go for snark.

Stupid is as Stupid Does

or Everything I learned About Sex I learned from a Redneck

Alabama has upheld its 1998 law restricting the sale of sex toys. The best line from the story is this:

The appeals court said it agreed with Alabama that the law exercised time-honored use of state police power to restrict the sale of sex.

Yes, that's right boys and girls. Selling a vibrator is just like being a pimp. I'll bet you didn't know that. Despite the fact that prostitution is dangerous, demeaning and spreads disease and sex toys are generally safe and fun, Alabama courts have decided that these are the same thing in the eyes of the law.

Fortunately, it appears to me that it is still legal to own these devices, you're just not allowed to make any money selling them. Any Alabamian with a computer and $30 can still purchase a vibrator and have it shipped to them. And anyone creative enough to sell lucite art in the shape of a penis would probably be able to avoid criminal prosecution. But you probably couldn't get away with forming a non-profit and selling vibrators because the sale would still generate funds, even if those funds weren't staying with an individual.

Hey, I'm just sayin'.

Wingnuts on Parade

I see Michelle Mangalang is back with her old photo. She had written earlier in the week on her own blog why she changed it there. For today's article, the secret password is "scandal".

The scandal is not that an anti-war propagandist has accused the U.S. of targeting journalists. That's par for the course. (Yes, hello again, Eason Jordan.)

The scandal is not that mainstream media sympathizers are blaming our military and dredging up every last shooting accident along the treacherous routes to Baghdad Airport. Again, no surprise here.

The scandal is that Italy -- our reputed ally in the global War on Terror -- negotiated with Sgrena's Islamist kidnappers and may have forked over a massive ransom to cutthroats for Sgrena's release.

Where is the uproar over this Islamist insurgency subsidy plan?

Maybe she's just jealous because so many people won't even pay $24.95 for her books.

Dr. Mike guest-hosts for Martha Stewart and teaches us the meaning between terrorists and feminist-fearing academics. He opens with a conservative classic, thus showing that he is too lazy to prove much of what he claims with any kind of verifiable facts.

Recently, I heard that animal rights activists had developed a strategy of going to plays and spotting women wearing fur. After identifying a target, they would hand comic books to their children under the guise of giving them something to read quietly during the performance. Unbeknownst to them, the comic books contained pictures of slaughtered animals with the words “Your mommy is a murderer” printed below. [emphasis mine, conservative tactics in the original]

Given your concern about animal pain, why do you intentionally inflict pain on innocent children? Do you consider animals to be superior to humans-a belief espoused by both Adolph Hitler and Charles Manson?

Finally, Antonio, why do animal rights activists get so mad when I refer to them as terrorists? Is it unfair for me to refer to PETA as a terrorist organization, given that they often destroy people’s property (e.g., spray-paint their minks) and traumatize their small children?

Ben Shapiro actually stumbles onto a tiny bit of truth, which he buries in conservative Christian propaganda hate-speech: 

The BGLTSA, as a wing of the radical homosexual movement, is looking to broaden the definition of normality to include deviant behavior. They're not looking for passive tolerance. They're looking for active acceptance. Now, ignoring homosexuality is no longer allowable; we must instead champion it, equating it with heterosexuality. In fact, homosexuality must be prized over heterosexuality; an open homosexual may proclaim to his heart's content that "dreams can come true -- you can find a same-sex partner," but an open heterosexual may not state that marriage constitutes "having it all."  [emphasis mine]

I keep comparing the "radical homosexual movement" to the civil rights movement. It used to be widely thought and accepted that black people and other non-whites were sub-human. It wasn't enough for them just to be free--now they wanted to be equal. They wanted to be educated and promoted in the workforce. What next--interracial marriages?

There are so many more at Clownhall and other divisions of Wingnutland, but I can only take so much hate, lies and propaganda in one sitting. Enjoy. And please remember to chew with your mouth wide open.