| friends. hello. I fear writing this entry because I haven't checked the xanga in so long. but when I have more time..i'll update in what's been going on... i promise. i'm coming home in like a weekk...i'm excited to see you all... i miss my chicago family..how are all of you?? |
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| I love my brother! If he ever pulls himself together, he'll be coming to New York, and I will be excited about that... |
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| Hello friends. I'm in Chicago. I've been here for a few days now..I got
in on thursday night ...we left on a family vacation to Wisconsin
friday morning. Lake Geneva was fun. We stayed at this amazing boat
house place with like a hot tub and stuff..it was called the Lake House
Serenity or something weird like that. Friday we went Jet skiing and
Saturday was 8 hours of boating, tubeing, water skiing, wakeboarding.
We really had so much fun but, Holy cow--I am so burned. It is not even
funny. And don't even get me started cause I did put sunblock on. It
hurts to move.
It's really fun to be with my family and spend
time with them, but I think, I realize the more and more I return home, the more I know,
I am meant to live on Long Island. I've been talking to my mom and dad
about going to design school in New York and spending more time working
on my own craft. I have been feeling for a while now that I need to go
back to school and get better at art design and drawing in order to give to my ministry even more. I realize, if I
did do this, it wouldn't happen for another year, but I know that it is
in the distant future. It is a hard thing to tell your parents, that
you potentially, could never be coming back home to where you are originally from. Well, it is particularly
harder to tell one parent over the other in my case.
I also have come to the realization that I would have to leave ywam to
do this as well. I wish, obviously, that I could do this online and
still be able to give all of me to my ministry. I know that is not
possible either. It has been my life for 3 years and to think
about leaving the reason I came to New York is unsettling. But it is
exciting at the same time, to see what is behind a door I have never
really explored before.
I would obviously return to missions whenever God would call me back
because that is where my heart is at...without a doubt. I know I am
especially called to New York and what my base is doing. It fits my
calling exactly. That is why I am there. There is no easy time to leave
and that is the reason I am hesitant. But I know this feeling of
passion within me that becons my soul to do something and I don't want
to ignore it.
I don't know..I guess some of the best advice I have ever gotten before
is from a friend of mine in switzerland. Brittany told me always to
follow my heart, because that is where my king lives. So, I will. Thank
God that it leads me to New York. Cause I cannot imagine leaving -ever.
Anyways, just a part of what's been going on within me. Thanks for reading or something.
If you are in Chicago, and you want to be my friend, you can call ..otherwise..you know I am around. Hope to see some of you.
I love each of you,
h.
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| I look to you even when I can't see the stars.
To you, before the day begins to fade..
I'll turn my eyes, to the one who holds the light
I'll give my heart to you.
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| Send your spirit.
So, as I've been told the world is awaiting my updates because people wanna know... what's going on with me I guess. So, sorry for not updating in a while. Life has been fun...
I got home a few weeks ago.. from chicago..drove home 13 hours alone..and it's been chaos ever since. Designed a camp tshirt..banner--worked like crazy... and said goodbye to a million of my friends within the past few days/weeks...that's been really hard..some for good, some I will see again soon. Thank God. But, yes.
My freaking birthday was a few days ago. It doesn't feel like I am 22..but it feels like I have been living 22 years--maybe more. Days are longer and longer..nights are shorter. My birthday we went to the city..for the vicio show..and they sung happy birthday to me and samira gave me flowers in the middle of their set. I felt so special. I love samira. I think she's amazing. We got home at like 5 in the morning and took the friday off and slept forever. Thank goodness.
Last night Holls, Sarah and myself went a sweet sixteen Disney birthday party for our friend on long island. Holly dressed up as Cruela Devil and Sarah and I were 2 puppies from 101 dalmations. Holy cow..we had so much fun! We laughed for like 3 hours as we were making our costumes... I will post pictures on here soon...they are soo funny!
and today is father's day and I just want to spend it with dad. I hope you guys are doing well. Thanks for all of the birthday phone calls and messages. I love you all. pace! h. |
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