My theology teacher said that Moses came down Mount Sinai and found the Israelites "doing the funky chicken around the golden calf."

He also said the sarcasm of Jesus and the Prophets was "funnier than a rubber crutch."

And he regularly describes people in the Bible as getting themselves into a "meck of a hess."

I love Baylor's religion faculty. 

My dog won't eat out of plastic or styrofoam, or any container that's too small. I didn't know this, so she hasn't eaten the entire time she's been visiting me. Then my mom came today, and her food went into a normal bowl, and she's had three meals already. Silly dog.

My mom brought me a housewarming gift. It's an egg-separater. It looks like a face, and when the egg whites separate, they come out through his nose. And his name is Boogerboy Boris.

I watch a lot of television this summer. CSI Miami, Dirty Jobs, What Not to Wear, Miami Ink...Horatio, Delco, Mike, Stacy, Clinton, Garver, Ami--these people, I feel like I've gotten to know them so much better. Besides Jordan, they are the people I see the most of, so it makes sense. I also think my hand and the remote control have fused into one entity now--I can almost change the channel just by thinking about it. Almost. Still working on it though.

Right now, I'm watching A Baby Story on TLC. It's about a family who is adopting a little girl from China--the family's name is Bloodgood. That's a terrible name. But I want a little Chinese baby now. No, nevermind, not now. Someday, maybe, but I'm not ready for a baby of any nationality right now.

It's a sad, sad sad summer.  

Two gondolas to carry us,
Grand Via was hilarious,
St. Paul was there to marry us,
We lied, "We're already married!"

'Cuz here's proof: we have suntans,
And I spoke up with my new hands,
Listen to my car,
What is it telling us?
Start...please start..please start.

"I should be in a place like this. Get to wear slippers all day, friends come to visit you...plus, you get to do those word association tests. I love those--there's no wrong answer. Like, blanket...tuberculosis! See? It's great."

I love Seinfeld. I've been watching a lot. My summer has been very eventful.