| not in a good mood.. so heres a nice depressing story, read it tho, its good..
her whole life she tried to be strong. show others how happy she could be... she never showed emotions, even through the saddest of times, she managed to put on a fake smile, and try and lift others spirits. but little did everyone know she sat in her room everynight crying... not because she didnt have a great family or amazing friends, cause she did.. but because she felt so empty and couldnt understand why..she would look back on pictures and see those that were once in her life and cry, not being able to understand why things havta change and why friends had to leave her and why people had to die... she coudlnt understand why, if there was a god, people werent more happy..shouldnt he be helping? answering prayers?... throughout her whole life she always had close friends,and was always able to make herself the center of attention, with her happiness and seflessness...but things started to change.. she made friends that she thought were the greatest but she was no longer the best friend.. she was no longer the center of attention, and evem this seemed to bring her down. she realized she couldnt alwyas be the center of attention, but she atleats craved alittle more love.... still, she managed to try to make others laugh, cause she didnt want to show her pain... little did they know her laugh was secretly tears inside of her...even through a family death, she couldnt cry, she didnt wanna seem weak and get attention from her family onlybecause of her weakness..this completly shut her down, cause she knew that if there was a heaven , this man would be looking down on her, in awe, thinking she didnt care.. she felt so sad and alone..
than there was the day she met a boy..he seemed to understand her more than anyone she had ever known...and for a time, she felt almost whole....but than, once again, things had to change... he told her she never knew who he was, he told her he had lied... and that she wasnt the one who held the key to his heart, and than there was the day he went away.. she felt almost completly empty again.. she didnt know what to do.. she still had her friends, but they didnt seem to care anymore.. its like they had become these selfish people, who cared to much about themselves and those who cared about them , than to care about another friend in need...she felt alone, if she tried to tell her friends or family this she knew they wouldnt understand, and would just make her feel even more alone.. she just didnt know what to do anymore, she had given up, she decided to just put on this mask of who seh thought poeple wanted her to be..the happy, funny girl they all knew.. but she still, now, wears this mask, hoping, maybe one day.. someone will see right through her mask, and know her lonliness, and maybe they can help her to take this mask off, and be happy without it... |
this one is gonneeeeeeeeee