no one ever said it would be easy
they just promised it would be worth it
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| Thank you...for giving me confidence. The past few entries I've had I've received the best comments ever. Makes me want to keep going :) So thank you! 153 (-.5) YES! 3 lbs to go til my first 'goal'. Tomorrow will be the first complete week of my new diet regiment so I will probably do something special to celebrate that. So exciting! Intake:
1- 4" hoagie (ham, bacon, swiss, mayo, tomato)
2- apple with peanut butter (320)
Outtake: 15-20 minute walk outside w/ inclines and declines
Extra: 1 hour tanning outside I'm going to be on vacation this weekend so I'll be back on MONDAY! Think skinny | | |
| 153.5 (-.5)I definitely didn't space out my meals....EEEK! I can see the difference now in how puffy my stomach gets when I eat everything all at the same time! Anyways, not much to say today. I'm glad I keep losing weight. Rant: I hate when airline tickets are nonrefundable and nontransferable. I also hate how its limited to only one bag per person and all additionals are $25 a piece. Those airlines are so greedy! Tomorrow I have a dermatologist appointment, I'm basically going to go in there, and tell her I want to be flawless and see what she can do haha. Intake:
1- Smart start, skim, blueberries
2- Auntie anne's pretzel sticks
3- roasted chicken ceasar wrap (400), pineapple, pb m&ms
Outtake: 1 hour Cardio core class
Extra: 1 tanning salon sesh | | |
| 154 (-.5)So yesterday I felt totally ill..worst sinus headache in a really long time. I sat around all day and did nothing.  I also wanted to give in and eat eat eat...but I managed to space little meals out and used portion control. I'm feeling a little better today... Has anyone ever had the SlimFast Optima bars? My mom had some laying around so I tried one and it's huge on calories, but tastes good and supposedly curves hunger for 4 hours! I'm crossing my fingers that I can maintain my diet for a very long time, and of course see results! My goal is to be in the 145 range by August 29th. Intake:
1- Smart start cereal, skim, blueberries
2- Slim Fast bar (220)
3- Cobb salad w/ 1000 island (400)
4- Grapes and dark chocolate
5- 1 slice chicken & cheese quesadilla, a few walnuts (Eeeeek! didn't mean to eat all this :()
Outtake: 1 hour Pilates Thinspo: Marisa Miller (She's gorgeous and Maxim's #1 on top 100)
   
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| 154.5 (+.5)Today is a blah day. It's nasty outside, my allergies are terrible. I'll probably do some pilates. Intake:
1-2 eggs w/ cheese, yogurt w/ blueberries
2-tba
Outtake: tba
Extra: tba Good luck today to everyone! | | |
| 154 (-1)Not bad, not bad. Thanks for all the lovely comments, a lot of people are asking if the default picture is me....well yes, yes it is! I was definitely hesistant to put it up for privacy issues but I did it anyways cause it makes it more personal. So today at the gym during my class I almost blacked out, again. I was fine last week and for some reason today I just couldn't get my breathing right. I've blacked out (dizzy faint but not fall) before while exercising, and even just doing normal activities, but it's always random. Sooo embarassing to have to put all the equip away while everyone else is doing just fine.....Grr! Intake:
1-Smart start cereal, skim, blueberries
2-smart start cereal, skim, strawberries
3&4-roasted chicken caesar wrap, apple with peanut butter
5- tiny nugget of chicken, nonfat yogurt
Outtake: 40 minute walk outside, 1/2 hour Cardio core class, 5 minutes rowing
Extra: teeth whitened! Thinspo: Charlize Theron 
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& royal throne ;
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& goals ;
here it is
» so my story begins.
i was always the "big kid". taller, chubbier, than all my classmates and friends. years of teasing yet not really understanding why i was bigger or how i got that way, it just happened. i was an only child, and i was never pressured into playing sports or becoming a dancer, etc.
I started karate, which introduced me to a more active lifestyle, but it wasn't until 7th grade that I lost the weight. I joined the volleyball team. AND I developed a serious sinus infection that limited my ability to function. I was home schooled, having tremedous headaches, and most of all, loss my ability to smell.
Somehow the combination lead me from a near-200 pounds to shrink down to 115 pounds. Let's do the math, 85 pounds.
So I was skinny, finally, but the loose skin and stretch marks created insecurities that I never had before. I eventually got better, and I can just remember, shrinking, then being about 132, 145, 155, then reaching a high of 168. That's when I became conscious that I needed to lose weight. I'd be damned if I crept up to 200 again.
Calorie counting, extreme dieting and exercise helped me drop down to 155, then by prom senior year I reached 139. At that time I had worked so hard to lose weight, but I NEVER thought I was skinny enough.
College came around, and I averaged about 140-145 and then 10 lbs came after some drinking, but I was happy. With all this study of my weight and body, I know that my "body", eating how I want to eat, and exercising when I want to exercise, keeps me at about 155. But I look in pictures, and 155 isn't good enough.
After careful thought and consideration, I realize that my goal would be to weigh around 135-140.
But no matter that, I will still have that "fat girl" image in my head, people are always going to judge me because of my flabby, disproportional body, and it hurts. It is an everyday constant struggle. It will never end.
wisdom
» no one ever said
» it would be easy,
» they just promised
» it would be worth it .
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& <3 ;
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» measurements:
(begin of june)
thigh: 25 inches
calf: 15.5"
bust: 36"
waist: 30"
hips: 39"
» ugw: 135 .
» liveLAUGHlove .
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music:
©
citizen cope "if there's love"
seal "amazing (thin white duke edit)"
mc solaar "le belle et le bad boy"
basshunter "now you're gone"
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