So here's a funny story. I went to the dermatologist and got some medicines. A topical and an antibiotic pill. So I start following my prescriptions and a few days later my entire body started itching. A few days after that I end up soaking in the tub trying to get the demon out of my skin. Even the inside of my ear itches. I was struggling to figure out what was causing this, while it grew worse daily, and came to the remembrance of someone telling me he had poison ivy on his arm a while ago. Well that's great! I've figured out the problem. The unfortunate part is that it all could've simply been avoided had I realized the itching was poison ivy. Then I would've just stopped scratching it. But no... who follows that rule? I just kept scratching myself down a spiral of agonizing itchiness. And not just in the spots that had poison ivy. Remember how my ear itches? Yea... it was on my fingers. And yea... I touched everything like they weren't infected. So remember kids... wash your hands often, and when you know not to listen to that tempting siren sing, DON'T. And if you don't catch that analogy, take some time out of your busy life to learn some things. I'll give you a hint. Don't scratch.

1: If something good doesn't happen to me really soon, I'm gonna flip. A person can only take so much shit day after day.
2: I'm quite tired of people pushing me around/walking all over me/talking shit just because I'm small. No matter who's right or who's smarter, all it boils down to is who could kick who's ass. I find that retarded. Being a small guy, I've never cared to be a fighter. I always use what I can. That's why you don't fuck with me. I can hurt you in worse ways than physically. Though I only got pushed to that once, and ended up taking it back anyway. But I'm gonna step up and toughen up. If people fear me, they might respect me a little more. I'm pretty sure if I could kick Kerry's ass at the time, he wouldn't have done what he did. I may not get bigger, but look at bruce lee. Case in point.
3: I regret a lot of things in my life, but none more than my entire last year. All the time, effort, and pain put into Michaela... so not worth it. With her out the picture from the beginning, there are so many things I never would've done that I have (and regretted). People say you shouldn't regret anything because you always learn. That's true to a point. I passed that a long time ago. I'm sure glad I've learned what I have, about myself, relationships, and women, but I could've gone without the means to get there. If taking out what I've been through eliminates something I've learned, so be it. I'd prefer it that way.
4: People suck. Life sucks. Everyone has problems. Most people have a lot of them or some really big ones. Some people have both. You don't really have much control over it either. You can be absolutely perfect and not make mistakes and be nice to everyone, but you'll still have your shit tossed. I just heard of my uncle's friend going through a divorce after 30 YEARS of marriage. You think after that long, she'd want to TRY to save it? At least for the kids... but no. That just proves again you can't trust people or expect them to fulfill your hopes and needs. NEVER get your hopes up. Be positive/optimistic, but ALWAYS expect that the worst can happen, and plan for it. When a bag of shit and bricks hits you or your hopes fall through, it's great to just be able to not feel anything because you didn't INVEST yourself in your HOPES. Invest yourself in REALITY.
5: I'm moving on. Fuck Danny. Fuck Michaela. Fuck Kerry. Fuck relationships. Period.

Gr, I hate going psycho over Michaela. After I calm down I realize how stupid I was and how I took it too far. I disappoint myself so much when it comes to her. I take very very low blows, and I hate it. I would never do that to anyone else though. I try to figure out why I get that way. I think it's because I was WAY too crazy about her that it hurt me more than I could handle. I completely changed into a different person. I felt like the hulk, overwhelmed with anger. I refuse to be THAT wrapped up in a girl again. SO not good for me. I get so stupid I embarrass myself, and I hate it. Now a lot of people hate me, rightfully so. But they're all on Micheala and Kerry's end so I won't have to deal with it, I hope.