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| hey everybody im at a new xanga site. its hateking so if you want to talk just go there. |
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| well i guess i have calmed down a little. but the good thing is that i dont have to work tonight so i dont have to work around some retarded people. the only person that i enjoy working with is amanda k. she awsome to work with. if anybody ever gets a chance to work with her do it.
well i dont know what im doing tonight. we are (me and my feince) are supposed to go to her mothers but i dont know when. but at least im spending time with her.
i half expected to get kicked out last night. my father locked me out of my house. because hes "tired of my shit" and i think that is bull because all i ever do anymore is school, work, or at amandas. how am i trying to pull anything. i get all my chores done on time and he still wants to bitch at me. im getting tired of him yelling at me every night of the damn week every week of the month... i will be so happy that i will be moving out. he thinks that i will be crawing back to him saying "im sorry and you were right." thats not gong to happen bcause he says that everything that happen to my sister is going to happen to me and that im going to flush my life down the shitter. (shows you how much confidence he has in my life) lately he knows nothing about me and the way i have changed. he still thinks that im the little fuck up that he had to control. im sorry to tell him, im getting my life in order and its not gonna turn out nothing like my sisters. he can go fuck himself.
im sorry about that, he just pisses me off to no end. and he is the only person that gets me as pissed as i ever had.
i love you amanda and i hope you know how much.
jeremy |
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| im tired of people, im tired of them acting stupid and some of them need to grow up. damn there in high school. some of them are seniors. cant any of them think for themselves. im sorry i am really annoyed today. i was in a good mood but i dont know what happen. in the middle of english it just went down. my hole mood and temper was just like i dont want to talk to anybody. like in last period (choir) i was sleeping on the floor because i was tired and didnt want to deal with anybody and this kid turned around and woke me up to say that they were standing up to sing. i woke up and said FUCK, DONT FUCKIN BOTHER ME ANYMORE. he turned around then i snapped at the teacher because she woke me up. (i had just fallen asleep. that truely sucked.
later
jeremy |
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| for the one person that i love i tend to screw it up. im constantly making her feel bad. and today i made her question why are we engaged. and that hurt, because it was the same with ashli. it got to a point where she was wondering why we are together. and im afraid that the same thing that happen with her is going to happen with amanda. and im really scared because i dont, seriously dont want to be without her. dont ever want to leave her. but i cant help the way i am. and i dont know how to fix it.
jeremy |
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