okay so in class one day..we were talking about how journals are the best way to relive feelings and thoughts. and i figured since i don't keep diaries or secret journals ..xanga is a good way when im bored to "speak out" haha i dunno. im crazy. im insane. wow okay im so emo haha like not depressing emo..im just emotional & sensitive. ahahaa okay weird. hrm. so so so many things been going on lately. its not that great. church is kinda my escape from everything in a way...but lately God has been testing mee. its like sometimes WHAT ARE YOU DOiNG TO ME GOD? ahaha i don't even know man. so if church is the onlee place u noe i can vent and pray...why do you?? ahah im not even going to finish that. but yeh. weird...things have just be soo wack! it seems nothing is going right. i mean im not complaining im just wondering why things are the way they are. cuz usually things aren't like this. eh dats been happening a lot this year....its not even cool. but yeaaaahhhhh im tryna be patient and waiting for things to look brighter cuz as for now its just so hard to take. but im strong i know i'll be okay.

what year 2004 has been. i've had my ups and my hella downs. the beg. of the year was fun and exciting. the middle of the year was HAPPY but towards the end it was hell. but don't trip i'm strong. now i've learned from all of these downs and outs to be much more wiser and to  have faith that things will be better no matter what the case..family, friends, school, boyfriends..name it i can handle it ! & my ups were most definitely the best feelings i have ever had. they gave me that nice warm feeling inside. i mean i got my license this year, i was confirmed, i experienced many firsts and trust me some of those manys will never be forgotten..i mean wat a year. wOoW. i just hope that 2005 brings me much more happiness and experiences. i hope to grow and mature this upcoming new year. and a note to God please don't put me through hell this year cuz it really sucked. crying urself to sleep at night isn't a pretty feeling. but yeh now i admit that know what to do and not to do and i'd be crazy to think there won't be anymore downs in life cuz then how would i ever learn. but yeh i just hope this year will be a great one. so goodbye 2004 with its funfilled and disappointing memories. i'm sure this year will be the year i'll never forget. so yeh this is julia signing out of 2004 ! see you kids in 2005 for a better and more positive year !

hopefully

deng hOmie. u don't even know...u don't even gotta clue

...that i don't

okay so this morning..i wake up. got ready. went to church then ate out. went christmas shopping for the homegirls 'nd familiy. went home...went back to the mall did more christmas shopping. headed over to a different mall, found ashley. bought a present then headed over to downtown disney cuz i didn't wanna go alone and luckily the rents let her loose. great. downtown disney with the homegirl. perfect date.  haha jk i luv ash. but u noe it would be nice to go with someone else..like perhaps a significant other. (haha i can picture ashley reading this going hell no.) haha but yeah went to build a bear to buy my niece a bear. made it. bought it. headed over to sephora cuz ms.piggie wanted to play with make-up. got there looked around and came across a dude well a gay dude who talked to me about urban decay (a brand of make-up for those who don't know) then next thing u noe i'm gettin a free make over ..haha well kinda. after took a bunch of pictures cuz downtown disney was looking mighty pretty this time of year. asked random people to take pictures of us. hahah wat losers . oh well i don't care. so yeh that was my awesome night date with ashley..haha oh gawd.

whatz she got? ...