| - BLEEDfeeling enlighten at this very momentI'm going to UC Santa Cruz this Saturday for a Pentae' Conference for English class. Hope it won't be too hot/sunny down there, you know how I can burn up easily. At least I'll only have to work once this weekend! "yippe" sorry Lisa and the rest of the gang are on your own with "the boss" o.0 "ewwww"or more like "uh oh" or "boring!"
It was hella hot yesterday thank god I went straight home after class! I was kinda of pissed of at my friend on Tuesday b/c I waited for her at school from 5pm to 6:30pm. She invited me to have dinner with her but she already left school at 6pm and didn't even bother to call me. I know I should've called her earlier but I was doing some hw at the library and didn't leave until 6pm ,since I thought she was studying too. Then she calls me and is like so you still wanna go it's kinda late and we're downtown and gonna watch a movie. I felt that the tone in her voice told me she didn't really want me to go anyways because she would've remembered and called me earlier. I felt she just invited me out of pity because I'm like getting over my ex who happens to be her friend. Sometimes I feel like my friendships aren't very sturdy because throughout my years all my friends have out grown, forgotten, and moved on without me.
Like my ex for example, he made a big deal about wanting us to be friends after the break-up but he never even calls or asks how I'm doing. Plus he saw me the other day and thought it wasn't out of the ordinary to sit down next to me. while we were catching up he started looking at his transfer info he just print and ignored me. The nerve he came over to my table and sat down without asking and halfway during our conversation says..... "uh what was that" or something along those lines. That ticked me off but I kept it under control. he's always calling me mental and saying I'm having a break down or making a big deal out of something. His favorite saying " what's wrong with you, why you acting like a crazy bitch. I don't think he calls his other girl pals, bitches. I don't think I'm the one with the problem it's him so I guess thank goodness he dumped me or he would still be messing with my head and putting me down, calling me whore, bitch, cunt, etc. I'm starting to see maybe all along he was just using me first as a friend cause we were both lonely then as a gf and then finally he tired just have a sexually relationship with me. don't worry I didn't let him I stood up to him no matter what ugly names he called me I didn't let him have his way. You know he even tried to bribe me to do sexual favors for him. What am I to you a prostitute? The nerve, I feel sorry for his next gf because he's a ass and a womanizer. He'll probably blame it all on me b/c I was his first gf too but who cares. Hopefully he'll act mature and be responsible as he gets older.
Any ways enough about that, I just wanted to say I'm thankful for all my girlfriends out there that have been with me through thick and thin esp. Liz, Carmen, Lisa, Jenny, and the rest of you. I don't know what I 'd do without you guys and even though I'd have had hardships with each of you through out our friendship it still remain intact. So that means a lot, hopefully we will remain friends til the end of time no matter the distance and obstacles along the way!  love you guys |
