| :The one time when hate is beautiful:
Ok, I should make a disclaimer right away before God strikes me down...or even worse, my beloved Wolverines.
Hate is never beautiful and no one should hate anyone.
Well now that's done.
On to the important topic at hand...yes folks, its that time of year again when your beloved Wolverines take on the hated effing Buckeyes.
Fine, I'll say it.
I love Michigan..... Michigan. Michigan. Michigan.
I'm so excited about the game this Saturday.
I will be sporting a brand new awesome teeshirt that my dear friends, Sukwon and Jeanie Chang sent over. The shirt will be revealed to all on game day.
Anyways, just so this entry isn't completely pointless, here are a few factual Q&As for y'all (first two courtesy of Mr. Ken Lee. Thanks Ken!).
Question #1: How do you get an OSU fan off your front porch?
Answer #1: You pay him for the pizza.
Question #2: There are two third graders...one is a Michigan fan and the other, an OSU fan. Who's bigger?
Answer #2: The OSU fan....because he's 18.
Question #3: What do you say to an OSU grad in a 3-piece suit?
Answer #3: Will the defendent please rise?
Question #4: What's the difference between the Horseshoe (OSU's stadium) and a porcupine?
Answer #4: The Horseshoe has 100,000+ pricks on the inside.
Question #5: Why did Michigan change their home field from grass to artificial turf?
Question #5: To keep their cheerleaders from grazing at halftime. (Ouch. This one hurt to write, but my mom taught me never to lie.)
And to finish the entry, here are two mini-stories for y'all (I copped one off a fellow Michigan fan's xanga.).
Story #1
Lloyd
Carr and Jim Tressell are talking one day on the Michigan practice
field, and Tressell says to Carr "Lloyd, what's the secret to having a really successful football program?"
Lloyd is feeling generous, so he tells him. "Jim, you have to have a
smart quarterback. Here, watch this". Lloyd calls Chad Henne over to
where they are standing and he says "Chad, who is your sister's
father's son?"
Henne answers immediately, with a smile: "Easy, coach. That's me."
"See what I mean?" says Lloyd.
So Tressell goes back to his team, and immediately calls for Troy Smith
to come see him. "Troy, who is your sister's father's son?"
Smith is confused, so he tells Tressell he will answer later. He
immediately seeks out Ted Ginn and asks him the question. Ginn mulls it
over and says "I think that's me."
So Troy Smith goes back to Tressell and says "Coach, I've got the answer. My sister's father's son is Ted Ginn."
"No, you idiot!!!", says Tressell. "It's Chad Henne!"
Story #2
There was
once a Michigan fan that liked to amuse himself by scaring every Ohio
State fan he saw walking down the street. He would serve his car as if
to hit them and then swerve back just missing them. One day,
while driving along, he saw a priest walking alongside of the road. He
thought he would do a good deed so he pulled over and asked the
clergyman, "Where are you going, Father?" "I'm going to give mass at St. Francis Church, about 2 miles down the road," replied the priest. "Climb in, Father! I'll give you a lift!" The priest climbed into the rear passenger seat, and they continued down the road. Suddenly,
the man saw a Buckeye fan walking down the road wearing one of those
atrocious scarlet and gray sweatshirts with the big “O” on them.
Instinctively, the Michigan man swerved as if to hit him. But, as
usual, he swerved back into the road just in time. Even though he was
certain that he had missed the guy, he still heard a loud "THUD." Not
understanding where the noise came from, he glanced in his mirrors, but
still didn't see anything. He then remembered the priest and sheepishly
turned to him and said, "Sorry, Father, I almost hit that Buckeye fan."
"That's OK," replied the priest, "I got him with the door."
That is all folks.
Hope Coach Carr can walk off the field this Saturday one last time a victor.
Signing off, this is Justin "It's great to be a Michigan Wolverine" Cho.
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