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| Waking Life
I
suppose having a steady job has given me more time to think these
days. There's my 9 to 5 shift, then afterwards, on a Monday,
Wednesday, and Friday in the evening, a little running and tennis with
my cousins and my brother. Granted, I've been sleeping better and I'm
more focused at work, but that's monotony playing the trick that
everything in my life should stay the way it is and not really change.
Perhaps that's why I find myself being a little more than competitive
when it comes to exercise or even video games. Seems to be my way of
telling myself that I have changed in some way, but it surmounts to
something very insignificant when you look at the bigger picture of my
life.
I'm 27 years old, not a scientist, some great speaker, or
legendary artist. Didn't graduate from college, but still trying to
get my education nonetheless. I'm not making that 6 figure income, but
I can pay my bills and eat well from time to time.
I've been
asked why I'm not finishing my degree by my peers. Suppose it's not
something they should assume or question even if they say they care
about my future and well being. And by no means am I the epitome of
success, wealth, or character, but by God's grace I'm someone treasured
and loved.
And this quote is at the heart of where I feel want to be if I'm not already.
"To
show great love for God and our neighbor we need not do great things.
It is how much love we put in the doing that makes our offering
something beautiful for God." - Mother Teresa | | |
| SIDEWAYS(this is a repost
from my myspace blog) If you enjoy this you can view others on
myspace at http://www.myspace.com/jedmorales .
I suppose we're all accustomed to seeing things a certain way. Some
see things from a broad perspective and aren't too concerned with
details. Others like to nit-pick at every little anomaly in their
life.
And while seeing from both perspectives would help us
understand each other and the world so much better, sometimes new ways
of seeing need to be taken into view. Perhaps if we all took a look at
the world sideways.
You're wondering what that means exactly, so perhaps I should explain.
If seeing the world in a broader sense means I should look at the whole
picture and seeing the details meant taking notice of the smaller
unoticed aspects of life. Then all I might really be doing is not
necessarily taking a look at the world in a different way, but just on
different scales--small and large.
So then how would
looking at the world sideways appear? Most of us, when we sleep, lay
down sideways. Physically we're sideways, but in that position, when
we sleep, we dream, we hope, we aspire for great things, we face our
fears, and embrace our fantasy.
But what does dreaming have
to do with seeing the world sideways? Seeing the world sideways is
giving your life a dynamic without relying on scale to tell you how
beautiful, how entertaining, or rich your life truly is. It is a
vision that sets no limits on how any one thing should be perceived.
Have you ever stretched out on a beach and turned your head to one
side? Because what was once viewed from top to bottom now is no
longer seen with finite curves but gains distance, range, depth and
infinite possibilities. | | |
| SOMETHING NEWWell, I didn't think I'd go out anywhere on Valentines Day, let alone
enjoy myself. There were no birds chirping or the expectancy of a
new flame entering my life. But I did manage to try something new.
My new found friend, Christine, took me to go see a band called
Mikoto. I've never seen a hardcore rock band live until tonight,
but to my surprise I really enjoyed it. Now, I know you're asking
yourself if they're Japanese and the answer is "no"--they're all
caucasian. By the end of the concert I was in deep admiration for
their lead vocalist, who tore it up with a continuous yelling volley,
and didn't even lose his voice at the end of his set. I got it
all on video, so one day I hope to share this experience with a few of
you.
The night followed with nice quaint conversation and fries. hehehe
I would otherwise write something deeper, but my mental gateway is now closed. :) G'night everybody!
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| I had a dream last night. Not the kind you wake up kicking and
screaming from. Not even the kind you end up breathless from or
wake up sweating to. It's probably better if I give you a
visual.
I'm in the midst of a choir. The band is playing and a few people
are singing off to the left of me. To the front of me is the
choir director. They're playing what I could only describe as
really great black gospel. And there's a keyboard near me, so I
start jamming with them. The only problem is that every couple of
note I hit, seems as though I'm in the wrong key.
The choir director turns to me while the band is still going and tells
me to stop playing. I stop for a while, then start playing a
little again. Again, the director stops me and I sit down and
wonder what I'm doing wrong.
What was so strange about that dream was that nothing seemed wrong in
it, but me. I knew for a fact that I could stay in the key the
song was being played in, but it wouldn't translate to my fingers no
matter how hard I tried. To love music so much and have someone
tell you to stop playing is like asking a baker to stop making tasty
pastries or a teacher to stop sharing knowledge.
When I woke up I realized that I'm not yet a master of my craft.
To a love a thing dearly, you'd think, there's time spent in study of
it. Without even practicing I could present myself as a scholar
to someone who knows little about what I love. But if I truly
spend time with what I love, then it becomes a natural part of
me. Even a scholar might ask me what it is I do.
Another day in my journey.... :)
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| A friend said to me today while we were talking about romantic
relationships, "Once you're their friend girls will never see you any
other way." I thought it was pretty rediculous because most of
the really good relationships I've seen had started off as
friendships. I'm sure the hardest part is finding out whether
that friend that you're making finds interest in you just the same.
As of late, a strong, yet delicate feeling has come over me. A
bubbling swell of happiness coupled with the satisfying knowledge that
I'm finally building deeper relationships. Friendships slowered
tempered in the flames of time. And with time and a lot of help
from the Lord I'm finding patience.
It's funny how I use to rush things most of the time whether it came to
relationships with friends, family, or even in decisions concerning
money. Yet, in realizing that God holds my life in his hands
tells me that there is a time and place for everything good and bad to
happen in my life. Not that I haven't known that before, but that
it's become a steadier belief in my own heart and something more
visible in my walk. So taking time out to listen to a friend or
spend time with family should never warrant the arrest of time from
them, God forbid. That even though I know tomorrow may not come,
taking time to be excellent and love people around me is well worth a
few moments.
As for romantic relationships, it will come when God feels I'm ready for them or vice versa.
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