Currently Listening Eyes Open By Snow Patrol "I'm miles from where you are. I lay down on the cold ground and I pray that something picks me up and sets me down in your warm arms." see related

Huh, I'm still growing up....when will it end?

It's weird to me that growing up is a process that I am totally watching as it happens to me.  I am enjoying my life right now, don't get me wrong.  I like where I am going with my life.  I feel comfortable, even.  It freaks me out, though, that I am seeing myself grow up.  It's funny, because I have definitely talked about this before.  While it still scares me, I am more comfortable with the fact that I am growing up.  It's one of those things...it's like looking back at what I thought was "growing up" before was really nothing, and now it's for real, and now I am growing up.  I'm starting to see that this is a process that will not be ending anytime soon.  Today, I brought my work home with me.  Now, I have done this before, but never this hard core.  I brought home a manilla folder full of the paper work I needed and a DVD of the visit I need to rewatch to fully transcribe everything that happened.  WOW.  A manilla folder. Megan said it best when she said "Ya know who does that? Grown-ups".  Whoa. I didn't know I was one of those. This may seem minuscule to some people, which is definitely ok.  It's not a big deal.  I'm aware.  But, why is it such a big deal to me?

Things keep on changing.  My job has become important to me.  I feel bad about taking off....not because I am afraid to upset the boss, but because I know things won't get done that I would normally be doing.  (And doing well, might I add.) Even though it is not the most exciting all the time, I like my job.  I like it...and not just because of the people I work with.  I like it  because I enjoy it.

So, me and my girls have been watching Grey's Anatomy lately.  (If you haven't yet, do it.) Tonight we watched an episode where Meredith comes to the realization that she is growing up.  While I am not sure her exact age, she has to be in her late twenties....she is a doctor.  She still didn't consider herself a grown up.  This is something that is gonna be going on for a long time.  I am choosing to see this as a good thing.  I hope to be that accomplished in life but still feel like I am young and not one of those (you know, those grown ups).  (makes me think of peter pan...)

While it totally scares me, I am becoming ok with this growing up process.  I am really attempting to not worry about what will come, because, really, what good will that do?  I think I may even begin to enjoy this all, despite the moments of stress and worry that will inevitably come along.  I have people with me who are also growing up.  We get to talk about it and all the changes that it brings.  We get to "grow up" together.  I am realizing that change is gonna come and that even though I may not like it, change can definitely  lead to the better.  If I am enjoying my life this much right now, I can't imagine what the 'better' will be.

This was very thoughtful.  I got to thinking and couldn't stop.  If you got this far, thanks for listening (reading). 

I probably miss you....tons. 

so, i feel all grown up.  i feel like i have talked about this a lot lately, because i have.  right now i am working (a real job!) and going to school and still trying to have a life.  the life part is not working out as much as i would have hoped.  i could complain, actually, but i am choosing not to.  ya wanna know why?

i am not complaining because i really do feel like i am growing up.  i am learning what it means to have real responsibility and to really get things done.  i am having to appropriately budget my time in order to make everything fit.  (that's something i've done forever, but it feels more real now--i'm not organizing when i can hang out and go to events, i am organizing when i can work and when i can study, and then, with the rest of the time, i am figuring in when i can play).  i guess it just feels good to feel at least sorta grown up (i know i am no where near actually being fully grown) since i am so close to graduating.  (wow!)  it has it's downside too, though, and thats where the complaining (that isn't gonna happen) could come in. 

i actually really like my job.  it sounds scary to people (i supervise visits for children with divorced/seperated parents) but i am finding it to be fun sometimes, and just interesting the rest of the time.  not only that, but i am well-liked by management.  it makes me happy.  while this is definately not what i want to do forever, it is a very good organization (as a whole) for me to be working for, not only now but in the future as well. 

on another note, i am starting to try to not complain as much and to see the good side of things, even if they may suck on the outside.  it may not verbally come out as "good things" yet, but believe me, i am working on it in my head.  that in itself is a good thing. 

life is good.  i hope it is for you too. 

congrats to all the graduating seniors (high school and college alike)! good job, folks!  i'm bummed i can't make it down to baytown for the graduations, i'll miss you guys, but, know i am thinking of you guys!! congrats! have fun!!

lots of love peeps. 

Just a little update. Don't get too excited.

I had so much fun celebrating Jena's 21st in Austin!! Good good friends, good times.  I enjoyed it! I also enjoyed getting to see my good ole covecrest friend Chris! Woohoo!

Other news: I finished my internship today!! I have a job now! Yay for making money! I have missed having money, and, therefore, missed shopping.  But soooooon I will be shopping. Oh yes.

I cannot wait for this semester to end. I will go home for a few days, and then come back here to do a maymester class, and then be free for the summer.  (Except, of course, working and making money.)

ONE MORE SEMESTER! I cannot believe I am graduating in December. It is so crazy. I don't wanna be a grown up.  I know I'm technically not yet, but still.  I enjoy just being a college student.  But, still, yay for graduating!

LOVE YOU! (you know.) MISS YOU!

PS - I am actually watching an Astros game right now.  Be proud. I don't know what has gotten into me. I watched part of one the other day too. I'm alone. I can't blame this on anyone.

Go 'stros.

What a weekend!

Man, these are some HOTT girls!

Thank GOD for spring break!

NOLA....here i come.