jewjewbee234's Xanga

Sunday, September 25, 2005

Sun, 25 Sep 2005 22:05:26 GMT

Alright who is the bastard talking about UD! On second thought i dont care. Ill Fucking Kill You! So yea how come when it like raining and the waetherman says ther is a 30 percent chance of rain. Look the fuck outside! Its raining. Tell me there is a fucking 200 percent chance of rain, i dont care! IT STILL IS RAINING!

How come these people are so hell bent on not being a conformist. By being a non conformist as you call it you are becoming a conformist. Get it douchebags? Stop wearing your all black clothes and moping around and trying to be different and weird because you think its cool. The other day i was in target and these group of beat ass "non conformist" girls walk up to me randomly and ask me for my screen name and my blood type. Right there thats when i felt like i would have to start busting some heads with jewish prayer but i withheld. Instead i told them to fuck off. Then they siad they like being weird and they are "sugar high". Come on wasnt that like third grade? Sugar doesnt really have that kind of effect on you that much. Stop trying to blame sugar because your a fag. And being weird isnt funny and cool. Your just the weird kid that no one really wants to be around except for other weird kids. You talk about how much you dont care what you look like and stuff yet you spend three hours in the morning applying your makeup and stratigically putting holes and sewing your clothes together. When you read this graham you might be dissapointed because i already used that. But any way to the "non conformists"...FUCK THE HELL OFF!!!

God my crabs itch

Shalom bitches!

Monday, August 22, 2005

Mon, 22 Aug 2005 21:09:44 GMT

Hey everybody. Or should I say hey graham because your the only one who still reads this shit. Something has been bothering me. I was eating my chinese food awaiting the moment that I crack open the magical treat that tells me my future. The moment had come and I took out the little slip of paper that can change your fate only to read "Things are impossible until they are not." I thought about this seeing how deep it was. Then i came to one conclusion: WHAT THE FUCK!!!! That has no meaning what so ever. That doesnt tell me anything. Thats like saying "My hair is brown until it isnt" "My balls itch until I scratch them". These People are paid money to sit there and type little things on these papers. Yiou think they could put some thought into them. Instead they sit there and probably smoke theyre oriental weed. "Dude Chang, listen man. This is deep shit. Things are impossible until they are not. Woah thats goin in!" Yea Im done for now. Theres other stuff but I cant remember. Im still thinking about the skeleton key. If I remember Ill be back. And tell me some ideas if you want.

Shalom Bitches!

Monday, June 27, 2005

Mon, 27 Jun 2005 05:08:51 GMT

Its been a long time since I wrote on here. Many things have been running through my head that I want to question. A topic came up the other day about, is it popular for japanese kids to wear english words on their clothes? Someone told that yes it was. So I decided I want to become a fashion designer in japan! I will make shitty shirts that say things like "vagina" on them. They wont know for a little bit. Then they will find out and try to get Godzilla on me. Ill smoke that son of a bitch like a...cigarette? Not very creative

I always hear "I lost my something in Nam" but I never hear "I found my something in Nam". There must be little vietnamese running around finding all this shit in Nam and keeping it. Greedy Bastards!

Michael Jackson is a free man. This has no effect on me whatsoever except that it gives Conan O'Brien a lot of new material!

Southern people suck. Go fuck your cousins! I watched Delieverance the other day and it fucked me up for life. I never want to hear piggy squeal again! I think those to inbred hillbillies were probably two guys they found in Georgia. They were probably like do you want to be in a movie? Then told them to act as they would normally. Hicks suck.

Groche because I can!

Peace because my back hurts and I need to lay down.

Shalom Bitches!

Sunday, May 29, 2005

Sun, 29 May 2005 17:13:26 GMT

Here I am, rock you like a hurricane! SO yea my development pool opened yesterday and this little fat ass was "swimming". It was more of him floating and the pool would just carry him along. Now I was watching this kid through my gym window wondering why he even came to the pool. For one hour he didn't do anything. Then I saw papa Lurch. Now Me and Brian have a long history with the man called Lurch. He hates us for sledding in trashcans and giving him funny faces because everytime it happens we get in a fight and egg him on. The reason we call him Lurch is because he is like 6'4 and 300 lbs. He is a large dude that looks like a monster. But he is a fatty. Lurch's wife is the fattest woman on earth. So he takes his son down to the pool to sit in water so he can hit on the young lifeguards. Now yesterday I was in a mood for fucking around and this happened to be the hottest life guard we got. So Lurch is trying to mack it with her and I knock on the window and hide. Nothing. I do it again. He peeks his fat head in but couldnyt see me. Once more I do it. He comes to the front door and starts banging and yelling and I laugh at him. So five minutes later i was done pumping iron and went around back to the pool and gave Lurch a life lesson. I yelled "She is too young Frankenstein!" and went home.

Why do people not like bananas? They say they don't like the smell or something. What the fuck does a banana smell like? If you do not like bananas tell me so i can see how many of YOU people there are. Dirty smelling banana bitches.

EAT SHIT!

So yea this was a pretty straight foward entry because I felt like telling a story so it may be missing something. who knows? If it is im so sorry Mord and ill go cry.

Shalom BItches!

Tuesday, May 24, 2005

Tue, 24 May 2005 01:21:15 GMT

I'M BACK LIKE NOBODY ELSE BITCH!!!! That's right. My cvomputer was fixed and I can now access the internet. I know g-crack has been shitting his pants waiting for a new update. I'm just throwing out the word I'm back and hopefully Dave Chapelle will come back soon too bitches! Give me some ideas for entries and the shoiut out will come!

Shalom Bitches!!!

Monday, March 14, 2005

Mon, 14 Mar 2005 01:01:24 GMT

Damn it!

Tuesday, March 08, 2005

Tue, 08 Mar 2005 03:15:22 GMT

Im sure Mordechai is sitting on the edge of his seat waiting for this entry, but this is not the granddaddy. I'm am just bored out of my mind. So i wanted to talk about peanuts. That's right those little pieces of shit hiding in their shells. Now why do peanuts come two in a shell? Is it supposed to be a bargain? Some peanuts come one in a shell, then you get ripped off and that ruins your entire peanut experience. Has anyone been too lazy to crack the shell after a while so you stiuck it in whole and crunch the son of a bitch. That is an interesting experience. I f you havent you must try some time. So you finally break that shell and you are pumped, you're ready. Then the peanuts has some sort of thin layer of god know's what. Does ne one know what that is? A lot of times i am too lazy to do that thing with your fingers where you rub it off(because that's the only way to get it off. Don't lie i know im not the only one!) so i eat it. That isnt really a good experience. What about the like dark peanuts? When you eat it it taste like it was burnt in likje peanut world or something. They are like the african americans of peanuts. No one likes them. (That was harsh, I'm sorry but notice i am not going to delete it.) Peanuts are salty!

Yea i cant really think well right now i have a lot on my mind. So i leave you with food for thought.

If a bowl of icecream was your real father, how would that make you feel?

Shalom Bitches!

Saturday, March 05, 2005

Sat, 05 Mar 2005 02:35:15 GMT

Now i know a lot of my loyal fans (GCracka in the house!!!) are wondering where i have dissapeared to. Well the truth is i have devoted my life to judaism. I am becoming a rabbi so i will no longer write on my site.

BULLSHIT!! I lyed so sue me. Actually i have one of the best stories in ages coming up so don't get your panties in a bunch and hold your god damn horses cuz its a doozey!

Shalom till next time BItches!

Wednesday, March 02, 2005

Wed, 02 Mar 2005 03:37:01 GMT

So I watched jackass the movie the other day and I realized how much I miss jackass. I used to wait for that show every week and I wouldn't miss it for anything. They have all this other stuff that is similar to Jackass but it isn't the same! I want back my Johnny Knoxville and Wee-man and such. Allthough I would have to admit I am a lot safer now because when I look back at old movies me and brian made there were a lot more risky things that we picked up from wanting to be like them. I do miss rolling around in pipes though.(they didn't have a smiley to match my emotion so i picked a random one) Yea jackass. Lewis Black is still the best! (Random thought)

Shalom Bitches!

Thursday, February 24, 2005

Thu, 24 Feb 2005 01:23:40 GMT

I'm fucked