Currently Iron Sky [Blu-ray] By Julia Dietze, Götz Otto, Christopher Kirby, Peta Sergeant, Udo Kier see related

It has become something of a tradition with my family that we all get together near the end of the year and travel down to Orlando, FL to take in the theme parks. We usually do the whole Disney thing, but this time we decided to shake it up and go to Universal Studios. This was helped mostly by an unanimous vote by the children (myself included) to visit Harry Potter Land. Needless to say, I took some pictures and I’ll post them here. Not like I have anything better to write about.

It’s a sign, man…

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Fig 12.23 – “…”

Harvest Moon: A New Beginning (3DS)
At long last, we have a Harvest Moon game worthy of standing on the same pedestal as Magical Melody and Friends of Mineral Town. It does so many things right that I’ll have a hard time fitting them into a paragraph. The big thing for me was how it sets goals that are both challenging and reasonable. Most of the new Harvest Moon games I end up quitting shortly after getting married, but this one actually makes me want to keep going in order to complete all of the challenges. It also does a great deal to simplify the tedious chores that would normally take absurd amounts of time. With this game, you can water multiple fields at once (it eventually opens an area where the fields are watered for you), chop down trees with one strike of an ax, and complete an entire day’s worth of mining in a few in-game minutes. This one truly feels like one of the greats in the series.

XCOM: Enemy Unknown (PC)
I hesitated at first when hearing about this game. I never got into turn-based strategy outside of the Civilization franchise, but when I heard XCOM had a base-building mechanic, I was intrigued. In spite of myself, I ended up having a lot of fun. The game may be hard at times, but it hurts because it loves.

Katawa Shoujo (PC)
I can almost guarantee that this will be the only time a visual novel will appear on one of my Top 5 lists. Don’t judge it too harshly because it was made by a bunch of 4channers. This game is totally legit and definitely tugs on the heartstrings at times. I can’t think of a way to describe the premise without sounding like a total creeper, so I won’t even try. Trust me; it’s good. Did I mention it’s free? It’s a free game.

Mass Effect 3 (PC)
Yeah, yeah. I’m one of the people that complained about the game’s ending. In spite of that, I had a great time playing the game itself. It had that same character driven feel to it as the other games and tied together several of your previous decisions. Also, I finally got to see Tali, my love’s face. That’s worth a crappy ending any day.

Giana Sisters: Twisted Dreams (PC)
What’s this? Two hipster indie games on Jimbo’s list? Yes. Yes there are. If you don’t like it, then you should play them and like it. This game was something I happened to stumble upon when browsing GOG.com. It looked like a simple, old school, gem-collecting platformer. And you know what? That’s exactly what it was. And I loved it for that. One word of advice: if you’re going to play it, play it with a control pad. All the jumping, spinning, body-swapping shenanigans are just insane on a keyboard.

Honourable Mentions

Dishonored (Xbox 360)
Reason for not making the list: Liked Mass Effect 3 better

Spec Ops: The Line (PC)
Reason for not making the list: Only recently purchased it and haven’t given it enough time

Lollipop Chainsaw (Xbox 360)
Reason for not making the list: Low replay value

Mario Tennis Open (3DS)
Reason for not making the list: Less of a difficulty curve, more of a difficulty fjord.

Team Fortress 2 (PC)
Reason for not making the list: Despite the fact that I probably played this game more this year than any of the above games combined, this game came out in 2008.

Currently Workingman’s Dead By Grateful Dead see related

After months of anticipation and excitement, I finally had the chance to see the long awaited Wreck-It Ralph. Now I get to embark on the difficult journey of reviewing the film without dropping any spoilers. Also, “rosebud” was the sled.

Fig 11-3: The true hero of Wreck-It Ralph

But before I go and review the actual movie, let me stop and talk about the short film that appeared before it, Pixar-style. It involved an absolutely adorable, black-and-white-styled romance between two office-bound desk workers. The reason I bring it up is because it seems almost as if Disney knew what a bulk of the audience would be: lonely 20-something gamers with office-bound desk jobs. It’s as if they’re trying to offer us a little bit of hope before the remainder of our lonely lives snuff it out completely.

On a happier note, I am pleased to report that Wreck-It Ralph was actually a good movie. If Disney can still make good movies like this, it makes me think they might not completely screw up the new, inevitable Star Wars sequels (I’m looking forward to seeing Mara Jade!).

As I mentioned in my Battle of the Smithsonian review (way back in the dark ages of 2009), certain movies can be considered “cameo flicks”. However, while Smithsonian screwed it up by just throwing characters onto the film reel willy-nilly, Wreck-It Ralph made its cameos feel more organic. The cameo characters played a part in the overall story without overwhelming the actual characters and feeling forced.

The main characters were also well done. The titular character (Wreck-It Ralph‘s Wreck-It Ralph) was impressively nuanced with his own dreams, desires, and grudges. The way others reacted to his bad-guy stereotype added to his feelings of frustration.

The character that impressed me most, however, was the little brat Vanellope von Schweetz, Her appearances in the trailers simply did not do her justice. I thought she would be an annoying little girl that would leave me with my head in my hands wondering what I did to deserve this punishment. Instead, we learn throughout the story that she is, in fact, a broken individual lashing out at a world that rejects her existence and who fights to find her place, to a degree that puts Ralph to shame. I somewhat hope Disney decides to make her one of their official princesses, but I know that’ll never happen since she has too much of a personality. Also, she had striped stockings, which is awesome. Though, much of the effect is lost on such a little girl.

Wreck-It Ralph had lots of funny moments. I was literally LOL’ing at certain times, to use modern parlance. I did notice that the two audience demographics (hopeless geeks and young children) were laughing at completely different things, but I’ve come to expect that from these sorts of movies. Another little thing that made me giggle was during the credits. It started off with what sounded like Owl City, and this song played as most of the little kids and their families shuffled out. After this song, it switched over to, no joke, a J-Pop theme song for Sugar Rush from AKB48. I thought, “okay, they’re catering to the geeks now.”

To sum things up, Wreck-It Ralph is an awesome movie and everybody who has played a video game at some point in his or her life should go out and see it. I give it a solid 9.8577768/10.23. I’m already looking forward to Wreck-It Ralph 2: The Wreckoning.

It’s Midna from The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess! This year I tried to go for something a bit more detailed. I goofed up a bit with the eye and some of the pointy details, but I’m otherwise pleased with the way it turned out. I based the carving on this image: http://itsmikuru.deviantart.com/#/d4tg16k

It was recently requested of me that I post some pictures of the things I collect. Since it’s the weekend, and I don’t have much else going on, I figured now would be as good a time as any to post some photos of the crap I have.

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Dear Hotel Pillows,

Thanks for always being there when I needed a place to rest my head away from home. I can always count on you to cradle my head in your soft, bleach-scented embrace. I think, however, that we need to have a little talk. You are just a bit too large and fluffy.

I am sure you have realized that I sleep on my stomach. When you are big and bulky all around, that makes for some very uncomfortable neck configurations when trying to sleep. The body doesn’t really work when one’s head is looking to the side and the neck is cricked backwards 45 to 70 degrees.

Look, when there are six or seven of you on the bed at any given time, I think you can afford to give a little more in this relationship. I understand that you probably have to cater to a lot of customers, but how about giving a little variety? Here are some suggestions: big, poofy ones for people who sleep on their back, soft, flat ones for people who sleep on their stomach, those weird, tubular ones for people who sleep on their sides, anime-themed love pillows for the hopelessly lonely, wooden blocks for geisha, etcetera.

I believe that if you cater to a wider variety of sleepers in this way, you can appease more customers and ensure more repeat business for your hotel. Thank you for taking the time to read this. I intend to write to your old friend, the mattress, pretty soon about spring count.

Yours truly,
Jimbo

Well, the day finally arrived. For reasons that can be best described as a weird inside joke, a friend and I have been hyping up for this movie for months. The reason was simple: the absolutely adorable vampire goth girl with striped stockings. Despite all of the warning lights flashing above our head (dopey-sounding human protagonist, modern soundtrack, Adam Sandler), the need to see this film was overpowering. Never underestimate the power of striped stockings on the male psyche. Also, being directed by Genndy Tartakovsky helps.

I’ll come right out and say that Hotel Mavis felt incredibly short. I don’t know if it was the several randomly interspersed song and dance routines, the ridiculously abrupt denouement, or the unforgivable shortage of scenes with Mavis. It just did not feel like it filled out the full 90 minutes of its runtime. Maybe it was just how all of the characters seemed to move at two-times normal speed in everything they did.

There was nothing to really complain about with the plot. It was essentially about a father trying to protect his only daughter in a world he increasingly does not relate with. What I can complain about is the dreadful choice of human they had pair up with our pure, goth-styled goddess. He was basically an amalgamation of every person I would’ve punched throughout high school if I wasn’t such a coward. The kind of person with no goals or motivation, and did nothing but try to chit-chat about nothing and mess around when you were trying to actually accomplish things. The fact that that kind of prick ended up getting together with Mavis, hallowed be Her name, does nothing but rub salt in the wounds.

Since I put so much importance on endings, let me take a paragraph to harp about Hotel Mavis’s conclusion. I really get the feeling that the writers ran up against a wall and said, “oh crap, we ran outta time. We better rush the ending if we want to fit anything in!” The modern townsfolk were way too understanding of Dracula and company, the bat physics were wacky, and, most damning of all, it ended with a mind-numbingly terrible song and dance. Seriously, a part of me died that day.

Mind, the movie was not terrible. Despite all of its faults, I still managed to get a significant number of “lulz”, as it were. I was especially fond of the banter with the wolfman (Wayne) and the invisible man (Griffin). The snappy animations of all of the characters were more entertaining than I would’ve thought, and they were so consistent that it practically became a shtick throughout the movie. All of the little hints they drop about vampire tropes made me giggle as well (Dracula does not go “bleh bleh bleh”, where does that even come from?). Lastly, and perhaps most importantly, it took about two seconds to take the piss out of Twilight. Always a noble effort.

To sum up my feelings about Hotel Mavis, I’m going to say it was remarkably average. I can’t really call it a good movie, but I don’t regret seeing it. I’d give it a wait-until-you-can-rent-it worthy 6.93422/10.23 stars. I truly think Hotel Mavis would’ve made a much better television show than a movie.

Now that the hype is over for Hotel Mavis, I can start getting hyped for what is going to be this year’s greatest movie: Wreck-It Ralph!

Lately, I’ve been thinking about cartoon theme songs. In particular, I’m wondering why anime theme songs are so bloody long, especially when compared to good, old-fashioned ‘Murican cartoon theme songs. While I usually skip theme songs anyway, I couldn’t help but notice this trend, and it truly solidified during this anime season.

This season you had series like Hyouka, KoiChoco, NakaImo, and more with theme songs all at a minute-and-a-half long. On the other side of the ocean, you have shows like My Little Pony and Gravity Falls with theme songs around forty seconds long. That’s roughly fifty seconds of time that an anime could’ve filled with, I dunno, content! (read: panty shots)

I can see why this is. Those crafty Japaners want to sell CDs to sweaty, mouth-breathing nerds who would happily pay full album price for a disc with maybe three songs on it if they can tie the songs to some anime series. And what better way to fill a CD’s content than by just slapping on the opening theme song and the credits music (plus one other song that they slap in the middle of the TV season for no other reason than to sell more CDs)?

It is time to stop this hideous feedback loop! It is time to fight back! Stop buying this anime music! Maybe if we can all come together and stop this, we can bring some meaningful change to the industry. We’ll finally have shorter, more reasonable theme songs. We’ll have anime series with more content! (read: jiggle physics) Let us all unite! And while we’re at it, let us also build a time machine powered by flying pigs and pixie dust!

(Full Disclaimer: I am a sweaty, mouth-breathing nerd who would happily pay full album price for a disc with maybe three songs on it if they can tie the songs to some anime series)