Currently Listening Bad Day Pt.2 By Daniel Powter yep, i keep having them see related

i need freedom

i need freedom! i need to feel like i'm allowed to be human. to be able to be in a bad mood. to be able to sad or angry. i don't want to apologize for my feelings or my need for space. and, i have a right to change. i have a right to be normal and not a perfectist. why is that when i "mess up" the whole world ends and i get treated like i'm five. but, others who make life-changing choices that are bad, it's ok and they're 'only human.' well, fuckers--so am i. i never promised you a perfect time with me or that i was mary fuckin' sunshine. and yes. i'm going through some things right now and you're going to have to deal it. god, i need to be able to move out. i need to be 21 year old and enjoy myself. i need to stop feel bad for who i am. i need all of that. man, this is stupid and unneccessary. and if people really want an apology, it's going to be a fake one because i'm not sorry. if you can talk down to me like i'm 5, then i'm not sorry.

i'm not really doing anything wrong. i'm not having  a baby. i don't make bad grades, if anything i make awesome grades. i have a job. i work hard at everything i do. i don't ask for money. i'm not out every night with a different guy having random sex. i'm not an alcoholic. and although, i may be changing, it's because i'm growing up and i need some damn independence.

well, crap it's 12:30 and i have a test tomorrow. wonderful and now that i'm pissed and upset, i won't be able to sleep. i hate my life.

jessica

Currently Listening Bad Day Pt.2 By Daniel Powter (this was for haley) see related

so, like i said my bday was amazing. lindsey, nate, haley, joy, chiz and matt met me at my house. then our badass driver, corey drove us to PF Changs on the Plaza. Where we met Maryjun and her lovely boyfriend, Ben there. Then we saw Ashley and Lance. what a cute couple. then after waiting forever to get a table, we were sitted. but, our server was awesome and she gave me a few free drinks. what a doll, we really hooked her up. then off to westport. First, we went to dark horse, where the group met up with jenny wells, robby dove, megan and joel!!!! yay!!!! i was so happy to see my friends. then, i had some more drinks and some shots. after that we headed to Cactus and got our dance on. then, i saw miller, trader, christy, her boyfriend, lauren, and stephanie. it was crazy! and everyone told matt, that i looked beautiful and he was a stupid for breaking up with me. :) yay, i rock! so that was good. then, we went back to dark horse for a little bit and then we headed home. matt and i stayed at lindsey and nate's house. it was a good evening. i have awesome friends.

however, life right now sucks. if you want more details you'll have to call me or something because i'm not putting them on xanga.

best birthday ever!

i had the best birthday ever! it's was awesome. and i'm so glad that i got to share it with my friends! :) i hope everyone had a great time, i know i did. i'll give more details about everything later on. also, everyone can go to facebook site and look at pictures if they want to.

http://umkc.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2010951&id=66805837

love ya, Jessica

happy bday to me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! the big 2-1!!!!!!!!!!! yay.