hummm...well, i just got the sudden urge to update my xanga.....i dunno why...i dont really have anything exciting to say.....so yeah.....if you're looking to read something exciting my advice to you is to stop reading this....

i havent updated since december and now its february. im not gonna write about everything thats happened since then, so just use your imagination, haha. im in a wierd mood right now.... friday at school was pretty much the worst day ever, just thought id throw that one out there. it was like one of those bad "teen movie" days where you feel like everyone's staring at you. then miluska took me out after school and made me feel better with breakfast food at dunkin donuts, and analogies involving cupcakes. (brace yourself, this is the begining of my emo entry, im really a very happy person, and life's been good lately, i had alot of fun in new york and at superbowl parties tonight, im just in an emo mood right now, ill probably delete this by tomorrow anyways, so yeah...dont mind me) i hate boys. they're really horrible. i think it sucks so bad that all guys want out of relationships is physical stuff. its like the whole emotional aspect of it doesnt mean anything to them at all. and its like they dont even care when they hurt someone. fuck you. you're not cute. i dont even care anymore. and i dont want everyone to go away to college. that makes me really sad. and school stresses me out. and friendships stress me out. and i feel like everything exciting always happens when im not around. and im not really sure whats going on right now and i kinda wish i knew. but yeah, about the whole guys thing, i know you wont read this (if this is directed at you, you'll know) but you're a jerk. we were so wrong for eachother anyways. i know we've been over for like a month now, but i didnt realize what a jerk you were till recently. is it totally pathetic that after all that i might still wanna be friends with you? i at least want to talk to you to see if you can explain yourself for this whole situation. but i know you'll probably never talk to me again, cuz thats the kinda person you are, you just avoid people when they're mad at you instead of fixing it. douche fag. im rambling now, so im gonna stop, just in case you ever happen to read this. but if you do read this (yeah, right) i'd really like to talk to you. did i ever mean anything to you other than a possible hook up? do you even want to be my friend? ok, im really done now. goodnight.