I was not a child that grew up having her picture taken. Don't get me wrong, there are a number of photos of me as a baby and the obligatory school pictures and a dance recital or two. That's about it. There aren't even any senior pictures. It never occurred to anyone to take any. Not just of me, but of anyone. I don't think we even owned a camera the entire time I was growing up. Those were luxuries. It's just not something I am used to.
Which throws me straight into the ninth circle of hell in the digital age.
I love cameras. I have a great one and have my eye on another one and a snazzy camcorder. I've gotten used to them. I've gotten used to being behind them. And most of my subjects have no trouble being in front of it (heck, the dump practically thrives on it!), but then, they grew up with their every move recorded. I pull out the camera where ever I am, and everyone turns, shifts into position and smiles (this does not include my own children for some reason) then goes back to whatever they were doing. They have practiced smiles and poses-which is fine.
The problem is, I don't.
I don't have a pretty practiced smile and I don't have a good side and I don't have a good pose. It's not that I haven't worked on this, it's just I really don't have a good side.
This puts me in a quandary because for some bloody reason editors have suddenly started wanting pictures and God forbid, videos of their writers! What the hell are they thinking?? One of the reasons being a writer always appealed to me was because of the great, fabulous ability to be anonymous. They didn't ask Hemingway for that! Can you imagine Papa going for that? (actually, I can and it would of been hilarious, but that's not the point.)
So I'm asking you dear readers for help. Give me tips. Give me pointers. Give me advice. Give me some idea how to get over this phobia I have.
And if you're so inclined, I would love to see pictures of you. Show me how you do it. In fact, I will even up the ante-send me your picture (please do wear clothes) and I will be brave and post a picture of myself using your tips and techniques. I won't even make you wait while I lose 20 lbs, grow 6 inches and get a face lift.
You have no idea how horrified I am by the thought, but I really gotta learn how to do this.
I promise, unless you say it's ok, I won't post your pics here or show them to anyone else. You may send them to my email.
farmgirlkate@gmail.com.
Help me!
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