I didn't really do shit today. I got up and showered and got dress and was planning on going to the mall, but I didn't go. I also went to Sora's house today, but he wasn't there. So I came back home. Then I changed and went to go play basketball. I got back and ate some food and got online and talked to Eunji. Then she left and I cleaned up my room and my computer. I deleted aim and some other shit. I am going to change all my shit to LiDoOlmUnKi. Cause I like that name. Kanashii Tei means sad Tei and I am not even sad. So the hell with the whole being depressed thing. I got better shit to do. Tommorrow is my first day of school. Again... I don't even know where my homeroom is. I am going to just walk around like La la la la.. Wee...=/ Umm NO. Going to just chill with the Hugs. Not thugs. Hugs... Cause them nigga's is soft ass bitches. So yea.. Right now I am washing clothes. Cause I didn't do it earlier. I played a little gunbound. Probably going to play some more. I should go to sleep soon. So yea this is my last post on this name. Then I am changing all my shit to LiDoOlmUnKi. Aite bitches. ONE...

Days and days go by. Tears and tears fall down. The constant change in my heart beat. The constant rise and fall. The constant thoughts that run through my head, day by day. My nights and days alone. I spend them with my heart. Spend them with the one who dwels deep inside my heart. Is that enough. To subdue my urge. To maintain my love. If this is all i want... all I need. Than why can't I have... Pains me to be without your love. Your physical love. Your visual love. Not this feeling. Not enough... or I just want. The kisses we share. Like snow falling on a hot summer day. Soothing my body. Calming my every nerve. Her hugs...

ok

u noe wut

fuk dis

i can't write poems

n right now im crying..

so fuck it

*deep beath...sigh* Today... I can't think of any word to explain it. As always it was bothering, but ok in a way. I woke up about 12pm. Played a little gunbound and talked to my heart. She said I seemed sad. Well, thats me...sad. She went to take a shower. I was going to go take one too, but I didn't feel like it. So I just waited for her to come back. Then I got off. I wanted to talk to her on the phone. I called, but cell was off. I was going to get up and get back on, but didn't really feel like it. So I just lay there and think. Then she called. I talked to her and then my mom had to use the phone. I Got mad and hung up and threw the phone on the floor. Took a shower and left for Sora's house. Walked in the hot sun, but I didn't care. I was mad. I feel like I can't ever do this in this fucking house. Can't play my games in peace. Can't use phone when I want to. Can't even talk to someone for more than like 10 fucking minutes unless it's real late a fucking night. When my mom finally gets off the fucking phone. I went to Sora's house and chilled with him for an hour or so. Are some cookies and drunk soda. Then I walked back home. I wanted to come back over with my computer, but yea. That didn't happen.=/ I got back home and my God momma,sister's friends and my cousin left. They went back to Louisiana. My cousin took a picture of me. I played gunbound. Then I had to get off to let my god moma use the phone. So then I got back on and my mom wanted to use phone. I tried not to get mad. Anyway it's more like me being sad and depressed more than being mad. Cause I am bored and can't do shit. It's not really madness. It's bitterness. Whatever I don't know how I feel. Just wish I can stay online all day and talk to her or play games with friends. Download anime or something. Can't do shit like I said. So then I Just lay down and watched tv. So boring, but I have nothing else to do. Not sleepy. Besides I want to talk to her. I miss her. When I first turn on computer to write this on notepad my eyes was watery. Im bored and sad. Not a good thing eh? I am sick of watching stupid shit on tv. So turn on my radio and listen to music and post this. I lifted weights today and drunk some protein shit. Good for stress to work out. I bust some moves every now and then. Trying to get better. I know I got plenty of things to do, but... all I want is to do things that invlove her. I just want to talk to her atleast. Since it is all that I can do. She's coming back tuesday, but I feel I still won't even see her. Sad for me to think about it. Life can't be any better.^^ Sometimes I just want to sleep all day. Like I did before. Just stop caring and sleep to forget about how I feel. Just that I can't sleep thinking about her. Thats like telling my heart not to beat. Like telling my mind not to think. Like attempting to breath out one side of my nose and not the other without holding my nose. Just can't be done. All I have is her. I am happy for that. So I guess I am going back to lay down. I wish my mom would get off the damn phone. I hate this shit so much...

O great. I wrote this at 11pm. Feel asleep now it's 4am. I just woke up. Called her, cell is off. Now I got on, she not on.