What is honesty? It is the freedom to be true with yourself and the world around you. But more importantly, it is acceptance of what is real and the strength to be okay with that. Any ugly situation can be beautiful. I myself paint a prettier picture with humour. Looking back on my life and the ugliness in it, I no longer see what I used to. I see a funny story in place of each hideous scandal.
After all of my sorrows surrounding family life and my upbringing, one thing has become clear. Dwelling on the past is alright because it's impossible to completely let traumatizing events out of your memory. You may, however, lose the ugliness and keep the memory in a different form. If humour does not work for you perhaps you can replace sadness with action, picturing your past as a dramatic film. Then instead of being your shame, your past becomes your personal story of triumph. After all, you are still here and you did become a survivor of your own life. Don't ever be ashamed or dwell on what you cannot change; oppositely, embrace what is your personal history because it is what makes you uniquely yourself.
The fights my parents had were so shameful to me growing up but now i remmeber them as ridiculous, humorous events full of childish tactics and comical predictabilitiy.
Whether this all makes sense to you or not, the important part is that you face your life and be proud.
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