Where to Start?

I went in for my gastro checkup last Friday and after waiting around for blood work and various other tests, my doc came back and said he was admitting me.  Oh no you're not, I told him.  I have stuff to do.  Grandpa is on his way here, it's my daughter's birthday in three days ... can't I come back on Monday?  He told me that he didn't know what would happen to me between then and Monday.

I knew it too.  The walk to his office was hell.  I felt like I was 80 years old and about to fall over at any second.

At any rate, I DID leave, but only to come home and pack a bag, explain to poor Grandpa (who luckily was here to take over daughter and Daisy care while Husband was at work) and wait for my daughter to get home from school so I could explain to her what was going on and that I'd be missing her birthday party and I really didn't know what to do about that.  She took it with a grain of salt and gave me a hug and told me to come home better.  Little shit, but at least she's resilient.

Husband drove me back later that evening and we spent about three hours waiting for a bed, which eventually turned out to be a 'cubicle' which was really weird.  Felt like I was in solitary confinement.  Four small walls, a really tiny bed and this weird kind of bubble in the door for people to look into.  Good thing I'm a good sleeper.  I spent a little over 24 hours there before I got a room.  A room with a hacking, crying, gagging woman.  At that same time I felt bad for her, I wanted to shout 'will ya shut the fuck up?'  I'm mean.

And I swear Jennifer, if I'd have had your number or an internet connection, I would've been blatently begging you for some banana bread.

And not only that!  This freakin' place has NO TV.  NONE.  Not even in the family rooms.  OMG.  Husband brought me my laptop and a crapload of movies so it wasn't too bad, but still! What's up with that???

Anyways, the highlights (I guess):

IV for rehydration
2 blood transfusions
various IV packs containing vitamins and nutrients
bone marrow extract (if anybody ever asks for your permission for that shit, run away screaming because that HURT)
drugs, drugs, drugs
talk of a liver byopsy but that has yet to happen as they're waiting for my 'levels' to flatten out and apparently things are looking good (cross your fingers)

And I guess that's about it.  I've been sent home on 22 pills a day (including vitamins).  I am no longer allowed to take my Crohn's meds (they screw with the liver) nor am I no longer able to have one single sip of alchol (same deal).  (and that hurts)

I feel stronger, which is good.  I think that's the blood transfusion.  Apparently I wasn't producing enough to make marrow, if that makes any sense.  I've spoken to so many doctors, it's all a jumble in my head.  But it does make sense to me in the way I was shuffling along like an old woman and basically having to pull myself up the stairs with the railing.

Anyways, the past few months have been hell, and all I want is my life back.  I actually puttered around the house yesterday, doing this and that and it felt good.  Sat outside for awhile.

On a final note, here's what NOT to do when hooked up to an IV and woken up in the middle of the night with the mad urge to pee from all of the fluids they're pumping into you:

• Do NOT flail out of bed in a mad rush for the bathroom, get yourself caught up in the wires of your IV, fall flat on your face and smash your forehead off of the floor and proceed to just lie there and piss yourself on the floor.  Not cool.
• Do NOT actually make it out of your bed, halfway across the room, before you realize you're going to take a dump any second, so you speed it up and in the process rip your IV line out without even realizing it, spraying blood all over your ward and freaking out the nurse.  Not cool either.

Fun times.

I have another appointment in two weeks

Yes, I'm Alive

I'm home from a hellish hospital stay and hopefully on the mend.

I'll write more later when I have more time to myself.  Promise.

Thank you for all of your well wishes

So Here's The Scoop

Apparently I have chirrhosis of the liver.
Go Figure.
I started crying in the doctor's office because I just feel so stupid.  Chirroses of the the liver???  Are you shitting me?

I told him I worked in a bar for about 15 years and probably drank more than the average person.

I'm supposed to stop drinking, stop smoking and eat more healthy.

Goodbye my beloved tequila, I shall miss you.

Yesterday, he called and said my pottasium level was very low and stuck me on 6 pills a day.  I don't know what that's about but I looked it up on the internet and it wasn't all that good.  It does explain a lot though.   A ton of my symptons were there so I'm hopeful  that this stuff will work.

At any rate, things are being taken care of, so I'm hopeful.  Cross your fingers.  This stuff is depressing me.

My birthmom came down here and drove me to the Hospital.  I was pretty impressed with that.  The fact that she's worried about me is kind of cool.  And it was kind of funny that the doc seemed to speak more to her than to me.  I'm 38 years old and he felt the need to speak to her - more or less, tell your daughter all of this stuff.

Too funny.

Anyways ... I'm sorry that I'm not around too much.  There's been issues.

But I still think about you all

Worried

So I've been having a few problems.  I haven't shared, but that's pretty much the reason I haven't blogged much.

I have no energy.
I sleep too much.
I wake up in the mornings gagging and shaking and usually puke.
I have no appetite.
My hair is falling out more so than normal.
My skin is dry, more so than normal.
I have no desire for my usual activities.
Basically, I just suck lately.

I went to my gastro specialist last week.  He was immediately all over me.  I've been to the hospital at least four times in the past week for one test or another.  The last time was Wednesday when I had a complete abdominal ultrasound.  I go back for the test results today at 1pm.  My gastro guy has been very fast with all of this, and talking to me rather gruffly, which he does when he's being all serious and stuff.

So basically I'm worried.

Keep your fingers crossed, okay?

Thanks

I Suck At This Blogging Thing Lately

Not like anybody comes around here anymore anyways.  I shouldn't feel the guilt. 

I just really have nothing to say of much importance.  Or of any sort of comedic value.  I'm kinda boring lately.  Nothing's going on.  And I have nothing to write about.

That I know of. 

If you want the daily blahs, here they are ...

• daughter is gone on a school trip for three days.
• she asked me NOT to get out of the car when I dropped her off at school for the bus.
• that's nice, eh?  funny though.
• the poor DaisyPuppy waits for the bus everyday since she's arrived at our house, and now K isn't getting off the bus and the dog is freaking out.
• Husband was supposed to be travelling to Vancouver at the same time, which would mean I'd have the house to myself for almost three whole days.
• He cancelled his trip for some stupid meetings.
• that sucks.
• I spend too much time on crackbook playing scrabble and texas hold'em
• I'm totally lazy lately
• and that's about it.

Carry on!  I've nothing left to say really.