kmorganp's Xanga

Friday, June 08, 2007

Fri, 08 Jun 2007 15:55:27 GMT

I am taking Dakota to get rims for his car today. I am so happy and excited that I get to spend the day with him and he will be going with me to my dads. Dad loves him and Dakota really likes my dad. They are goofy, Dakota thought my dad didnt like him and my dad said that he really does like him, better than any of my other boyfriends, and that if he had to give him a big hug and kiss(on the cheek) to prove it he would. Dakota told him he was still waiting for the hug and kiss and dad just said not to tempt him!

They are so funny.
Im eating this really good soup...its that Campbell's Vegetable soup and its very good! I am not big on soup but this is awesome. lol I am random today and I feel a lot better than I did yesterday.

I was watching Celebrity Fit Club and Dustin Diamond (aka: Screech from Saved by the Bell) is so annoying. He is just out for everyone! He is always starting trouble and I was so suprised to see that poor geeky Screech was an like that. Well he was acting

Well I am gonna go finish eating my soup! Tis very good!

Thursday, June 07, 2007

Thu, 07 Jun 2007 23:55:05 GMT

Im back from the beach...
I wrote a big long entry but I set it to private. Sorry...I really expressed myself in it and it deals with issues I would rather remain secret. I just needed to relieve myself of it and I have done so. So much is going on that noone else knows about and its just personal thoughts and feelings and has nothing todo with thoughts or inputs of anyone else. Just myself and how I feel right now...
And I hate it.

Saturday, June 02, 2007

Sat, 02 Jun 2007 19:24:24 GMT

I leave for the beach trip in the morning...

It has not kicked in yet that I have actually graduated from high school but I know it will come July 2nd and even August when PHHS goes back to school.
But everyone has to move on to the next stage in life even though they may wish they could stay in that particular moment for the rest of their life. No worries other than having your homework done and not being late to class. Im going to miss it a lot.

6 days...

Mon, 21 May 2007 22:35:52 GMT

until i graduate...I don't know if I am excited or if I am dreading it.
Its coming on way to fast.

Sunday, April 08, 2007

Sun, 08 Apr 2007 14:28:27 GMT

Life is not going to well for me right now. I am so confused about everything and it just seems like all my walls have been torn down and everything around me is falling apart. I went walking yesterday and I was thinking about some stupid things that I know is not anything good to think about. For example; I wonder how people would react if I were to die today and who it would effect. We all know that when someone dies even their worst enemies stoop down and say they were best friends and they loved them and they wish they were still here. I don't want to die just yet but I was just thinking of who all would even care and what they would say and do. I am breaking down little by little and I have done nothing but sit in my room and feel sorry for myself all weekend. I have not gotten to talk to Dakota ever since school let out Thursday for spring break and here it is easter and I still cant talk to him. My heart is breaking. Its like apart of me is missing and I just don't feel like I can be happy.

I may start posting more in here because writing it down takes to long and I have so much that needs to go out at once its just impossible. I will continue this more later, maybe.

I Love You!

Sat, 24 Feb 2007 14:33:43 GMT

If I was given the chance
to say how I feel
I would say...
I love the way you say my name
and the way you hold me so close.
You make me feel alive inside
and I love your handsome smile.
Just seeing you sparks a flame
and makes my heart race.
You have made the scars on my heart disappear
with just one touch.
I never believe one could love so much.
I would do anything to keep you by my side.
Just to hear you breathing
as we lay on the couch.
And to feel you there with me.
I love being with you.
I love your bad hair days!
I love your goofy smile.
I love your baby blue eyes.
I love everything about you.
I love to wrestle with you in the living room.
I love how I can just be myself.
You love me for who I am.
And I love you for that also.
If I didn't get my message across by now
here it is...

I love you Dakota!

----------------------
I wrote that out of nowhere. Im no poet but its how I feel.

Friday, September 01, 2006

Fri, 01 Sep 2006 00:52:27 GMT

Today was a very bad day...its just to much to list so I won't.
I think I'm getting sick, plus my stomach is killing me and I think I may be getting like I was before. I was always sick to my stomach which made me lose my appetite which made me not eat. When I would eat I would get sick and throw-up. I just hope I don't get like that again. I couldn't handle it, I think it may be stress causing me to be sick but what do I know-- I'm no doctor.

I didn't get to go walking today--Mom and Jerry needed the car. Mom has to drive me to school tomorrow because they need the car to go to the doctor. I wish I had my own car. One that was completely mine.

I was afraid this morning I wasn't going to get to see Dakota. He had a doctors appointment and I didn't know so I thought he was sick and I was so worried until I seen him in the hallway when I was on my way to lunch. My day got better just by seeing him there. He gave me a big hug also which made it even better. Well I have to finish studying and get ready to go on to bed soon. Goodbye for now...

Wednesday, August 30, 2006

Wed, 30 Aug 2006 23:25:18 GMT

Today is our 1 year anniversary. And I am as much and maybe more in love with him now as I was then. Hopefully this will last forever, I love the feeling I get when I am with him. And when I look at him I smile and I just dont know why...maybe because he accepts me the way I am and he is the one person who really loves me? I hope he does, I know I love him more than anything in this world! I just hope he feels the same way. He motivates me to do my best and to think of what I want and not only for everyone else and to please myself as much as I please other people. I need to start doing things for myself, I always do things for other people and it turns out I would have been better off doing what I wanted to. I hate how I do that, I need to start doing things for myself instead of for other people. I am not getting anywhere with it. Only thing I am doing for myself is walking everyday where I have lost 15 pounds. I am very proud of that but I still need to lose 30-40 pounds. I will keep working at that. Well I really dont know what else to say so I will update tomorrow and maybe I will have something more interesting...

Wednesday, August 30, 2006

Wed, 30 Aug 2006 00:11:38 GMT

why is it the harder i try the worse things get, or is it just i cant please anyone and i need to just stop giving a living crap about anyone or anything. everytime i try to show that i care i get it shoved right back in my face like it was nothing and it just rips me all to pieces. do you even know how that feels?! and considering the last few nights i have been waking up crying for no reason is not helping me. First I woke up laughing for some odd reason and ever since then i have done nothing but cry and I dont know why. Everything is just falling apart and it is killing me. I just want to forget about everything and run away somewhere nobody can find me and maybe life will be better. I wont have to put up with all this crap and get myself all to pieces. I am a very emotional person and i can't hide it like everybody else can. I just want to disappear off the face of the earth for a while. I hate making myself feel like this but I just cant keep it all to myself I have to let it out someway or who knows what I would do...I dont know anymore. I just cant handle myself. time to go cry now...i hate this.

one other thing that really has me in knots right now is the fact some idiots get enjoyment out of this! why do people have to make things up and then run their mouths! its not entertainment it hurts and i cant take this crap anymore!!! if things turn out like i think they might then everyone can kiss my butt goodbye.

Monday, August 28, 2006

Mon, 28 Aug 2006 20:30:45 GMT

bonsoir!

You're dominant and powerful. You always need to be in charge.
While others respect your competence, you can be a bit of a dictator.
Hard working and serious, you never let yourself down.
You are exact and accurate - and you expect others to be the same way.

Your strength: You always get the job done

Your weakness: You're a perfectionist to a fault

Your power color: Gray

Your power symbol: Checkmark

Your power month: April

lol i took a wierd birthday thing and here is the results. I agree with it pretty much except i dont think i am much of a dictator....hmmmm oh well.

Today went pretty good considering its monday and mondays usually go horribly wrong. Nothing bad happened today and I think that I aced my Government test. French is starting to get a little interesting...

During webpage I had to go out in the halls and make the first part of the intro for the page. Mainly because I am the only one in webpage with permission to use the wonderful $300 camra from my digital video class. I feel very special. I decided to take a break from homework and update because I am sick of homework and I have a lot on my mind. I dont know if I should really say any of it but I will just save it for tomorrow and maybe I will spill it all. I really cant think of anything to say right now so I will just leave it at that. Maybe I will have more to say tomorrow.

***Your Five Variable Love Profile***

Propensity for Monogamy:

Your propensity for monogamy is high.
You find it easy to be devoted and loyal to one person.
And in return, you expect the same from who you love.
Any sign of straying, and you'll end things.

Experience Level:

Your experience level is high.
You've loved, lost, and loved again.
You have had a wide range of love experiences.
And when the real thing comes along, you know it!

Dominance:

Your dominance is low.
This doesn't mean you're a doormat, just balanced.
You know a relationship is not about getting your way.
And you love to give your sweetie a lot of freedom.

Cynicism:

Your cynicism is low.
You are an eternal optimist when it comes to love and romance.
No matter how many times you've been hurt - you're never bitter.
You believe in one true love, your perfect soulmate.
And if you haven't found true love yet, you know you will soon.

Independence:

Your independence is low.
This doesn't mean you're dependent in relationships..
It does mean that you don't have any problem sharing your life.
In your opinion, the best part of being in love is being together.

The Five Variable Love Test
http://www.blogthings.com/thefivevariablelovetest/